The WORST episodes of The Untouchables
Every episode of The Untouchables ever, ranked from worst to best by thousands of votes from fans of the show. The worst episodes of The Untouchables!
The Untouchables chronicles the campaign of Eliot Ness (Robert Stack), the young U.S. Prohibition Bureau agent, to smash the beer and booze empire of Al Capone in 1920s Chicago.
#1 - The Charlie Argos Story
Season 4 - Episode 26 - Aired 4/16/1963
June 25, 1933. Ness and Lee Hobson are called to the Castle, a baronial estate just outside of Chicago, which is both the headquarters and home of the underworld's notorious ""King"" Frank Argos; he is one of Ness' old foes. Argos' attorney Eli Halstead explains that wealthy Frank Argos is about to die; he wants to leave his $5-million in bonds to his long-lost son. And he wants Eliot Ness to be the executor of the will, because he doesn't trust any of his crooked associates. When Halstead says that Argos' wife left him many years ago, the feisty Frank Argos interjects he kicked his wife out! But she took their 7-year-old son with her; all Frank Argos wants to do is see his son once again before he dies. The King offers Ness 100 grand for his services, but Ness turns him down; he figures it's dirty money, a pay-off for protecting his organization. As Ness is leaving, one of the King's hoods, Arno Beale, tells Ness that the son, Charlie Argos, died in WWI anyway. The King dies. An
#2 - An Eye for an Eye
Season 4 - Episode 19 - Aired 2/19/1963
Chicago, Spring 1931. That night, Ness and his men are in their car; it's an 80 mph chase to catch a guy running whiskey for Solly Girsch. The 19-year-old driver has a high-speed accident; his car overturns and explodes in flames. Solly Girsch is the king of bootleg whiskey; he has 500 ""mom & pop"" stores pushing his hooch-- all together, they form the biggest single outlet of whiskey in Chicago. Next night, top boss Harry Mastrogeorge-- along with Solly's crooked lawyer Billy Baron and about half a dozen of Mastrogeorge's lieutenants-- are throwing a party for Solly, celebrating his getting his 500th outlet. They bring in a 2-foot-high cake. Solly quips he wishes a blonde would jump out of the cake. (she'd be pretty short.) But Solly has an announcement; he's buying 1,000 gallons of whiskey a day from them, and he wants to cut the price he pays from $8 a gallon to $4. They all balk, and Pete Topchinski is vocal about it. Big bucks are involved-- it's a $2-million a year busine
#3 - Jake Dance
Season 4 - Episode 16 - Aired 1/22/1963
Late Summer 1930. It started in Wichita, Kansas: a staggering gait called the Jake Dance. (we see a man staggering along using a cane in each hand.) There are many different kinds of alcohol, but the only kind that is safe to drink is ethyl alcohol; many people had been drinking Ginger Jake, which is contaminated with methyl alcohol, also called ""wood alcky."" And people who drank a lot of it often suffered permanent loss of muscle coordination, and developed a staggering gait called the Jake Dance. Many died. In Wichita, 1% of the adult population was stricken. So the U.S. Health Department calls for its top guns: Associate Surgeon General Dr. Victor Garr (about age 50, with a lot of experience and a deep care for patients), and his assistant, Dr. Daniel Gifford (about age 30, inexperienced and has a habit of always doing things by the book). Right now, they are swamped with hundreds of patients in the hospital. Dr. Garr sees his sidekick going over some notes. Dr. Garr snaps
#4 - The Speculator
Season 4 - Episode 14 - Aired 1/8/1963
1929. Eliot Ness gets another anonymous phone tip: a big meet at a warehouse on Grover Street, Nitti and all the boys will be there. At the warehouse, about 20 hoods are putting their record books into a huge trunk. Since Al Capone got nailed because of bookkeeping, from now on nobody is to keep any written records; there will only be one central file, and the bookkeeper will be Leo Stazak. Leo tells the boys that records, with notes on accounts receivable, would tip the Feds as to how the speak owners do business. Leo will run the central file, everybody else is just to use the phone and deal in cash. Then Nitti gives a little talk: they all know what happened to Artie Graff, he ran a good speak-- but he got busted because Ness got a hold of his records. Nitti adds laconically, ""The Organization has voted to give his widow a few bucks in memory of her departed husband."" (and the guy's not even dead yet-- enough said.) Ness and his men use their cars to crash through the wareho
#5 - The Pea
Season 4 - Episode 5 - Aired 10/23/1962
Chicago, December 18, 1930. On the southside of town, Herbie Catcher is playing 8-ball for 50 cents a game, in a dilapidated pool joint. Herbie, not being much of a pool player, gets cleaned out by Cooker. Herbie's best friend is Josh, a nice black man who happens to be blind, who is the employee working in the pool hall. Josh tells him, ""You'd be surprised at the things I can see, I'm an owl in the dark."" (""Owl"" is his nickname.) Since Herbie can't make money shooting pool, and only has a job working as a busboy, he is in the habit of getting a few bucks by giving Eliot Ness tips. However, today his tips are all stale. Herbie tells Ness that Wally Marcos is back in town; Ness says he already left again. Herbie has info on Angel Podaris; Ness says he sold out to Martin Rawlings. Herbie relates that there's a new place on Maple Street making bottles for imported Scotch; Ness says, ""We knocked it over last week."" Even though all the ""hot tips"" are useless, Ness slips him a fin
#6 - Line of Fire
Season 4 - Episode 29 - Aired 5/14/1963
Chicago, January 1933. Danceland has a big sign, ""30 girls, open until 2 a.m."" Inside, customers mingle with the dime-a-dance girls. Hoofer Ellie Haskell says goodnight to the owner, Marty Pulaski; outside, she is immediately shot by a sniper on the roof of a building across the street-- the sniper is Herbie Pulaski, Marty's mentally disturbed brother. Lt. Roy Gunther is on the case, he questions Marty, who has 20% of the dancing racket. However, Marty is sure his main competitor, Vince Bogan who owns 80% of the dance racket, is responsible for the killing; Marty phones Bogan and threatens to rub him out. Back at Ness' office, Lt. Roy Gunther discusses the case with Eliot. Ness has to go to New York to testify before a grand jury, he'll be gone a week-- he puts Lee Hobson in charge. Marty has his brother Herbie drive him over to Bogan's place; inside, Marty shoots Bogan. Outside, when Herbie hears the shots, he reaches for his rifle in the trunk of the car-- and has a flashback
#7 - The Jazz Man
Season 4 - Episode 27 - Aired 4/30/1963
During the blistering summer of 1931, Ness and his men are working tirelessly against both the illicit whiskey and the narcotics that are flooding the city. One morning, a despondent Capt. Jim Johnson visits Ness in his office; Capt. Johnson had been on a raid that netted 50 dope addicts-- one of them was his son Buz. Ness talks to Buz behind bars. Buz cooperates, and says he got the powder from a pusher named Peepers (so-named because he always wears shades); Ness gets Buz released. Peepers, meanwhile, is awaiting a big shipment of narcotics from Sal Rudin, alias ""Mr. Big."" Later, Agent Lee Hobson traces Peepers to where he's staying, at the Viking Hotel. Ness and Lee see Peepers carrying a small case of dope-- Peepers fires his gun at them; Ness shoots back, killing him. Searching Peepers' apartment, they find out that Artie Tresh, a bass violin player working at the Club 88, also lives there. They go to the Club 88, and meet the owner, Sal Rudin. When Ness says he wants to t
#8 - Bird in the Hand
Season 4 - Episode 6 - Aired 10/30/1962
December 12, 1929. That night, gangster Arnie Kurtz is in a car, watching a hit he ordered. Another car, speeding along and with a chopper blasting, guns down a pedestrian; but the victim pulls a gun and fires back, his bullet goes through the windshield. The car crashes; the driver is dead, but the hitman escapes. Arnie Kurtz goes to establish his alibi; at 10:35, his wife Stella drops in on her brother Benno Fisk, who owns a pawn shop. Stella has a job for him: deliver a payment of 100 Gs to a gangster in Washington, DC, for her hubby Arnie. Benno will be gone for 3-4 days, so Stella takes his 2 pet birds with her; Stella and Arnie are permanent guests at the swanky Lakeview Hotel. A newspaper headline reads: ""Parrot Fever Kills 2 More."" Ness and his men investigate the shooting of the pedestrian; Rico finds the driver's license of the dead driver of the getaway car: he was a New York hood named McHuey. It seems the New York Syndicate figures into Arnie Kurtz's trying to take
#9 - Unhired Assassin (2)
Season 1 - Episode 21 - Aired 3/3/1960
Movie: ""The Gun of Zangara"" (continued) Nitti's plenty sore! Mayor Cermak's stepped-up law enforcement has cut deeply into Nitti's operations. In the Montmartre club, Nitti takes a newspaper with a big photo of Cermak on the front page, and tacks it to the wall-- then Nitti takes out his 6-shooter and blasts 7 bullets into the photo. Nitti talks to 4 of his lieutenants. Frank Diamond says they better rub the Mayor out when he's out of town, or Capone won't like it; Louis Campagna knows of a good hitman in Florida: Fred ""the Caddy"" Croner, so-named because he poses as a golfer and keeps his rifle in a golf bag. The Mayor will be in Miami on February 15, the same time President FDR will be visiting there. While Nitti is planning Cermak's hit, in Miami Joe Zangara is planning to shoot the president. In Chicago, as if the Mayor hasn't made Nitti mad enough, he is now having a meeting with some City Council members and Ness.
#10 - Unhired Assassin (1)
Season 1 - Episode 20 - Aired 2/25/1960
Movie: ""The Gun of Zangara"" Chicago. November 9, 1932. FDR has just been elected president, and the repeal of Prohibition is inevitable. But later that night, Ness and his men smash another of Capone's breweries. Agent Youngfellow asks Eliot, ""Are we going to be out of work?"" But Ness tells him no-- after all, bootleg booze was only a part of the Capone empire: there's still narcotics, gambling, prostitution, protection rackets, etc. Capone may start muscling in on legitimate businesses; in fact, Ness is having a meeting with Mayor Anton Cermak-- they want to ""clean up this town"" before the Chicago World's Fair in the spring of 1933. Miami. Giuseppe ""Joe"" Zangara, a man with homicidal tendencies, decides to kill the president. A newspaper vendor is hawking his papers; Zangara talks to him, and is surprised to learn that Hoover is no longer president. But Zangara sticks to his crazy idea to kill the president, no matter who he is.
#11 - The Noise of Death
Season 1 - Episode 14 - Aired 1/14/1960
Chicago, March 31, 1933. Giuseppe ""Joe"" Bucco is at home when he gets a visit from his wife's cousin, Barbara Vittorini-- she says her husband Arturo has been missing for 3 days, and accuses Bucco of killing him. Bucco has his flunkie Abe Garfinkel take her home. Bucco knows about rub-out attempts, Guzik's boys once shot him 4 times, but he lived; Bucco swears to his wife Anna that he doesn't know where Arturo is. That night Ness and Flaherty go to the Vittorini restaurant for a raid. Mrs. Vittorini won't tell Ness anything about her missing husband; Ness knows that's Omertà , the Mafia code of silence. Inside, Ness finds crates filled with bottles of cheap whiskey. When Ness walks into the freezer room, he finds Arturo's body, tied up and hung on a meat hook. Barbara Vittorini breaks the code of silence, and tells him Joseph Bucco did it. Ness and his men pay Bucco a visit at one of his places. Although Bucco, in his 50s, gives the outward appearance of being a family man, he i
#12 - The Underground Railway
Season 1 - Episode 12 - Aired 12/31/1959
The night of August 3, 1933, outside the Louisburg Federal Prison in Pennsylvania. After serving 2 years of a life sentence for his part in the holdup of a Federal Reserve bank shipment, Frank Halloway is busting out, climbing over the wall. When a fellow inmate breaks his leg from the jump from the high prison wall, ruthless Frank Halloway hops into the getaway car that was left there for him-- and runs over the hapless inmate. Halloway's share of the loot, which was never recovered by the police, comes to $250,000-- and it's being held by Ed Johnson in Los Angeles, who never got caught. At the Palace Ballroom, they are in hour 257 of a dance marathon; Mona just wants to win and collect her half of the $500 prize money, but gangster Daniel Oates has other plans for her-- he wants her to escort Frank Halloway to L.A., since a traveling couple would look less suspicious to the police than Halloway traveling by himself. Daniel fixes Halloway up with a car, driver's license, suits and
#13 - Syndicate Sanctuary
Season 1 - Episode 13 - Aired 1/7/1960
(No date given, but probably 1932 which was a presidential election year.) 30 miles from Chicago, the (fictitious) Calum City; population: 10,000. Judge Leon Zabo is running for mayor, to clean up the town. Working hard in his campaign headquarters is his lovely daughter, Rosetta Zabo. Judge Zabo tried to put an end to vice, graft and corruption; in the last 6 months, he had closed down 110 bars, clubs and gambling casinos in the notorious Barbary Coast district. Late at night, Judge Zabo takes a taxi home; driver Joe Donato makes it a point to tell him the right door is stuck, and he has to use the left door. In front of Zabo's house, Donato again tells him to use the left door, which opens to the street side. A car driven by gangster Harry Mauldin runs the judge over. Ness and his men are on the case. With Capone in prison, and a crime crackdown in Chicago, the Syndicate is looking for another city to make its headquarters for the nationwide narcotics racket: Ness knows they
#14 - The Frank Nitti Story
Season 1 - Episode 28 - Aired 4/28/1960
1934. Prohibition had been repealed (the Volstead Act ran from January 17, 1920 - April 7, 1933). The syndicate was looking for new sources of revenue. Frank Nitti expands his empire, and goes after small theatres-- with his extortion racket. Late one night, after theatre owner Harold Coldman had refused to pay, Nitti has his triggerman Louie Campagna throw some acid into Coldman's face, blinding him. Eliot Ness and his men are on the case-- this is only the latest in a series of muggings and beatings; even a theatre was burned down. Ness knows if he lets Nitti get away with extorting the small, independent theatre owners, in a few months Nitti will go after the big chains. Ness is determined to stop it now. Frank Nitti is throwing a private party, some of the guests are Sidney Rogers (the glib liaison man in the extortion racket), and his main squeeze Ellie Morley (former showgirl), and crooked lawyer Ramsey Lennox (who used to be the mouthpiece for Al Capone). Frank Nitti's h
#15 - Power Play
Season 3 - Episode 2 - Aired 10/19/1961
By the Summer of 1933, a new wave of crime has engulfed Chicago. Due to a public outcry for action, Willard Thornton is appointed as a new commissioner to clean up the town. At a press conference, Thornton arrogantly says his office does not publicly constitute criticism of any law enforcement agency-- while his tone of voice implies he privately does criticize them. Eliot Ness is standing right next to him, looking more dour than usual. Ness and his men go on a raid, they find a shipment of heroin in a hideout. Then small-time dope-pusher (and junkie himself) Joey Loomis shows up, sees the Feds, and runs. Loomis gets captured. After interrogating him, and getting nowhere, Ness releases him. Rico asks, ""I know he's a small fish, but you just gonna throw him back?"" Ness reveals his strategy: he's going to let the big fish find him. Willard Thornton is really a crook, in cohoots with lawyer Barney Lubin (czar of the enormous Chicago bail bond racket), Felix Varsack (representing t
#16 - The Underworld Bank
Season 1 - Episode 26 - Aired 4/14/1960
New York City. Saturday, September 23, 1933. Top rackets boss Milo Sullivan is the head of ""Crime, Inc."" He has a meet with 5 other crime lords: Augie Epstein (gambling, Miami); Harold Bishman (political power in Louisiana); Ralph Lucci (rumrunner, Detroit Purple Gang); Dino Monteiro (slots, K.C.); and Arte Martin (numbers, prostitution, Seattle). Their profits from Prohibition had been enormous; with Prohibition ending, they were going to put their money to good use, creating the Underworld Bank. For every $1 they lend out, they'll get $2 back; they will provide the funding for hoods, who are preparing men and materials to pull off big jobs. Milo Sullivan says that right now, their $50,000 funding of a million-dollar fur heist will get them $100,000 in return. The Bank's operations are financed and managed on a business basis.
#17 - Little Egypt
Season 1 - Episode 18 - Aired 2/11/1960
Little Egypt (not the Belly Dancer) was the city of Morraine, the heart of the gangster-infected area in downstate Illinois known as ""Little Egypt."" Election night, 1931. New mayor Marcus Stone is giving a speech on the radio-- he meant what he said about reform, and promises to rid the town of Charlie Byron (a Major in WWI) and his gang, whom he calls ""bloodsuckers"" and ""scum."" Listening to the radio is Major Byron, who gives his gang orders to knock off both Mayor Stone and Sheriff Mooney; they both get tommy-gunned that night. Governor Joseph Stone calls in Eliot Ness; they decide one man should infiltrate this gang, and pick Cam Allison Jr., the son of Judge Cameron Allison who was killed by the mob. Since trying to communicate by phones (which can be wiretapped) is too risky, they decide Cam should communicate with Ness via carrier pigeons, which Enrico Rossi has trained for a hobby. The birds can fly the 100 miles from Morraine to Chicago in less than 2 hours (they say). Ca
#18 - Vincent 'Mad Dog' Coll
Season 1 - Episode 6 - Aired 11/19/1959
February 1931. In Churchill Downs, the entries for the Kentucky Derby are closed. Tight-fisted Dutch Schultz, beer baron of the Bronx, places a bet with the Syndicate: 100-grand in the Winter-book on Enchantment to win the Kentucky Derby. Trying to get the most for his money, Dutch knows he will get much better odds now than if he waits until race day. Dutch's lieutenant is "Lefty" Gallagher, and his bodyguard is Benny Bristow. Schultz has a powerful enemy in Vincent "Mad Dog" Coll, who earned his nickname (which Schultz stuck him with) due to his violent actions; his sidekicks are "Needles" Bledsoe and "Fats" Finney. Lefty Gallagher cautions his boss Dutch: if anything should happen to the horse between now and the Kentucky Derby in April, the Syndicate doesn't give refunds. But money-loving Dutch is savoring the 7-to-1 odds he's gotten; at post-time, he might only get 8-to-5. When Lefty leaves.
#19 - Head of Fire, Feet of Clay
Season 1 - Episode 27 - Aired 4/21/1960
Chicago. (year?)* The jury had been out for 12 hours, on the case Ness had worked so hard on, trying to get a conviction for top mobster Johnny Fortunato. Now the newspaper reads: Fortunato got off, the chief witness was a ""suicide."" At 9 p.m., Ness decides to get some spaghetti at Socrates Eatery. Ness' old high school buddy, Frank Barber, drops in. They laugh and smile as they recount their glory days at Garfield High, when Barber was the star football quarterback, and Ness was his favorite receiver. Frank Barber is prosperous now, he owns the Chicago Sports Palace. Ness and Barber go to the boxing matches, and Ness is shocked to learn that Johnny Fortunato is one of Barber's ""customers."" Veteran boxer ""Pops"" Gantry is pummeling a green kid named Fabiano. Ness comments to Barber about the 7 empty seats in the front row; Barber tells him Fortunato will show up for the 8th round, when Gantry takes a dive.
#20 - Mexican Stake-Out
Season 1 - Episode 7 - Aired 11/26/1959
Chicago. October 1, 1932.* In 32 hours, Judge McGinnis will consider evidence against racketeer Theodore Newberry-- owner of gambling parlors, speakeasies and houses of prostitution. Ness and his men had been working on the case for a year. The key witness in the case against Newberry is a timid City Hall clerk named Julius Embry. That night, Newberry's hitman Jerry Fanning goes to Embry's house to shoot him-- he fires at a shadow in the window. But police guarding the place fire back, chasing Fanning away. Fanning then goes to Newberry's place to report his failure-- Newberry takes the bad news graciously: he belts Fanning, giving him a black eye. Newberry is holding a party, and one of the guests is a corrupt Commissioner. Ness has Embry moved to a hotel room for safe keeping. However, the corrupt Commissioner sends a couple of City Hall crooks (Whelan & Dottweiler), pretending to be agents (and having a document signed by the Commissioner) to the hotel, and they tell the guard they have orders to put Embry into protective custody. The hoods knock the guard unconscious, and put the snatch on Embry. The next day, D.A. Beecher Asbury has to ask the judge for a postponement because Embry has vanished. That night, Ness is sitting alone at a table in the Savoy restaurant. A Mr. LaMarr strikes up a conversation with him. Then LaMarr hands Ness an envelope with $20,000 in it. Before a surprised Ness can react, a photographer takes a picture of the "transaction." Ness has been framed! The photo winds up on the front page of the newspapers the next day, along with the headline: "What was in that envelope, Mr. Ness?" To make matters worse, the kidnapped Embry has been taken out of the country-- down to Chihuahua, Mexico. Newberry decides to rub out Ness and Embry at the same time. Newberry has Fanning pose as a cab driver, and give Ness and Agent Martin Flaherty a sob story-- Fanning tells them he's ratting on Newberry because he "added a new girl to his collec
#21 - You Can't Pick the Number
Season 1 - Episode 11 - Aired 12/24/1959
Chicago, October 1932. The depths of the Great Depression, marked by unemployment and poverty. The only chance some people felt they had to rise out of poverty, if only for a short time, was to win the lottery or at the punch-boards. The mob saw this as an opportunity, by coming up with a numbers game. People picked a number from 0-999; their odds of winning were 1-in-a-1,000-- the payoff was 600-to-1. The thousands of losers, pouring money into the mob, were never mentioned. Right now, mobster Phil Morrisey is pulling up in his fancy car, and making a big show for the crowd by giving today's winnings to a Mrs. Pollock-- for her investment of 25 cents, she is now getting $150, a fortune by Depression standards. And all those watching are determined to bet again, convinced they will all be winners someday. Phil Morrisey has also attracted the attention of Eliot Ness and Agent Flaherty. Ness tells Phil that $400,000 out of every million collected goes to the Syndicate-- for corr
#22 - The Dutch Schultz Story
Season 1 - Episode 10 - Aired 12/17/1959
March 1935. One of the toughest mobsters in New York City is Dutch Schultz. He and his mob were responsible for over 100 murders. Dutch is into every racket: liquor, narcotics, labor shakedowns, the numbers, selling protection. But "Lucky" Luciano is muscling in on his territory; to try to keep his clients from paying to Luciano, Dutch Schultz has his boys work his clients over with fists. When Joe Floris won't pay 30% protection money to Schultz, saying he is already paying 15% to Luciano, Joe Floris gets some acid in the face, blinding him. But Dutch has a gentler side, too-- his wife just had a baby. Eliot Ness and his Untouchables are on special assignment in New York City. Agent Flaherty works undercover, and Ness and his men get Schultz's books. It looks like Eliot Ness is about to nail Dutch Schultz on income tax evasion, just like he did Al Capone. One night, Dutch Schultz offers Eliot Ness and Flaherty a $75,000 bribe; the Untouchables facetiously pretend they are interested. Flaherty: "That's a lot of money. I could buy a whole chain of delicatessens." Ness: "You know, I've always thought I'd like to own a chateau in France." Flaherty: "Well, if you throw any parties, I'll cater them from my delicatessen." Ness: "Special rates?" Flaherty: "You'll be rich, you can afford to pay the going price." Ness: "Now wait a minute, with a special chateau I ought to get special rates..." Dutch Schultz is angry at being mocked, and leaves in a huff. Later, Schultz is indicted. But Schultz's crafty attorney says his client can't get a fair trial in New York City, and asks the judge for a change of venue. Arriving in the small town of Clearview, in upstate New York, Schultz ingratiates himself to all the townsfolk by spreading money around; not by bribery, but legally. For example, he talks to the grade school teacher, Marsha Harper, and offers to buy uniforms for the school's baseball team; that sort of thing. By the time the trial starts on September 7, the town thinks
#23 - Ain't We Got Fun?
Season 1 - Episode 5 - Aired 11/12/1959
Summer 1933, Chicago. The mobsters were branching out from liquor, going into the numbers racket, call girls, gambling and dope. One of the most successful gangsters is "Big" Jim Harrington; right now he and his gang are in back of Benny Hoff's Blue Poodle nightclub, and they smash a truckload of liquor. Harrington tells Hoff, from now on, he will only buy booze from him-- and Harrington demands 75% ownership. When Hoff balks, one of Harrington's boys, Loxie the Torch, intimidates Hoff. Loxie takes out a whiskey hip flask, but it's not filled with whiskey. Loxie goes, "Alright, now, smell it," as he pours the gasoline on the terrified Hoff, "light a match and >fshhh!!<" and he holds the lighted match up to him. Hoff doesn't want his club to be torched, too; the club becomes Jim Harrington's Blue Poodle. Harrington was out to get ownership of all the speakeasies and nightclubs in Chicago, and flood the town with his rotgut-- 1,000 gallons a day. The violence was a matter for the police; the booze was a federal matter. And so Eliot Ness meets with Hoff, but Hoff doesn't want to talk about it. Hoff also owns another small club on the side, a German beer garden called the Double Eagle. Hoff is manager and best friend of a stand-up comedian named Johnny Paycheck, who is working there this week, and his jokes are strictly from hunger. Paycheck regales the audience, "We were so poor, one day my mom said to the landlord, 'What about the floor?' and he said, 'What about it?' and my mom said, 'We want one'." You get the idea. Harrington is in the audience with his moll Renee Sullivan, and figuring that Paycheck's rotten jokes are no worse than his rotgut, he offers Paycheck a job in one of his downtown speaks, the Blue Poodle. Harrington now has his sights set on taking over the swankiest nightclub in town, Schlessinger's Mohawk club. Eliot Ness warns the owner about Harrington's plan to take over. 6 weeks later, Johnny Paycheck has picked up some better jokes (thank heavens)
#24 - Ma Barker and Her Boys
Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired 10/22/1959
January 16, 1935. Oklawaha, Florida. Eliot Ness, along with Bill Youngfellow and Martin Flaherty, are closing in on Ma Barker, who is holed up in a house along with 2 of her sons, Lloyd and Fred. Ness says they are wanted for everything from bank robbery, kidnapping, to first-degree murder. Now that Ness has found where the Barkers are, he contacts half a dozen state troopers and local police for backup. From a distance, Ness yells at Ma Barker and her boys to surrender and come out with their hands up. Ma Barker goes to a closet, and inside is an arsenal of weapons-- machine guns, pistols, hand grenades, etc., enough for a small army. She fires a chopper at Ness; he jumps behind an 8-foot long wooden flower pot that gets riddled with bullets. Ma Barker throws a hand grenade that almost blows up Bill Youngfellow. Ma Barker is the most vicious outlaw they've ever faced. In a flashback, we see how it all started in Tulsa, Oklahoma years ago: Ma Barker was a church-goer, but always making excuses for her 4 boys who were committing petty crimes, which escalated into serious crimes. In 1927, while the 4 boys were looting a store, Herman got shot by a policeman. Pa Barker finally had the guts to walk out on the bunch. Ma and her 3 boys committed bank robberies, and killed a bank guard; also a kidnapping. They committed crimes in a 10-state area. In 1935, Pa Barker tipped Eliot Ness, and Ness almost caught the Barker gang in St. Paul, Minnesota. Then the Barkers kidnapped a millionaire's son and got $200,000 ransom. Arthur "Doc" Barker and his fiancée Eloise left the gang; Arthur took his share of the ransom and went to Chicago, but all the serial numbers were recorded with the police. Around the first of January, 1935, when Arthur spent a $10 bill, the grocer informed Eliot Ness, so Ness knew Arthur was in Chicago. Ma Barker stupidly sent a birthday cake to Arthur (who was using the alias Clarence Tillman), and enclosed a postcard, "Greetings from Oklawaha, Florida." Art
#25 - The Doreen Maney Story
Season 1 - Episode 24 - Aired 3/31/1960
New York City: Yankee Stadium, the Bronx. On the evening of June 8, 1933, Max Baer knocked out Max Schmeling in the 10th round of their scheduled 15-round championship boxing match.* The gate was $240,000. (Since 60,000 fans were there, that means the average ticket price was $4.00) An hour later, one of the Granite Armored Cars, with 4 armed guards, drives off with the receipts. Doreen Maney steps in front of the moving truck; the driver slams on his brakes, but Doreen falls down as if she's been hit. When the driver gets out of the truck and checks on her, she pulls out a gun. Sheik Humphries drops a tear-gas canister through a conveniently-located vent in the armored truck, forcing the other 3 guards out. Jake Logan, a triggerman who was hired just for this job (not a member of the gang), keeps his chopper handy. Then Len Carson, the 3rd member of the gang, drives up with their getaway car; he starts stealing money from the armored car. Everything was going as Doreen wanted