Son of the Beach

The WORST episodes of Son of the Beach

Every episode ever - ranked by fan votes!

From the Howard Stern Production company, comes SON OF THE BEACH! Son of the Beach is a hilarious comedy about Notch Johnson, world's greatest lifeguard (hardly), and his unit SPF-30, taking place in Malibu Adjacent, CA. The Show is about Notch and his gang getting into different situations which ensure pure laughs and will make you want to watch again and again.

Last Updated: 5/6/2022Network: FX
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Chip's a Goy
star
5.83
6 votes

#1 - Chip's a Goy

Season 2 - Episode 7 - Aired 4/24/2001

Needing some R&R, the Gang heads to the tranquil Middle East. Their visit with Notch's Israeli counterpart, Noccus Johnstein, is cut short, however, when evil terrorist group HUMMUS kidnaps Notch. Can the Gang save their fearless leader, or will HUMMUS crush them like so many chickpeas? In the meantime, Chip falls in love with Noccus' daughter, Chcch, and agrees to convert to Judaism. He soon finds this means giving up much more than he bargained for.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Chip's a Goy
star
5.83
6 votes

#2 - Chip's a Goy

Season 2 - Episode 7 - Aired 4/24/2001

Needing some R&R, the Gang heads to the tranquil Middle East. Their visit with Notch's Israeli counterpart, Noccus Johnstein, is cut short, however, when evil terrorist group HUMMUS kidnaps Notch. Can the Gang save their fearless leader, or will HUMMUS crush them like so many chickpeas? In the meantime, Chip falls in love with Noccus' daughter, Chcch, and agrees to convert to Judaism. He soon finds this means giving up much more than he bargained for.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Attack of the Cocktopuss
star
6.80
5 votes

#3 - Attack of the Cocktopuss

Season 1 - Episode 12 - Aired 9/5/2000

When the Cocktopuss sets shores on the beach, the mayor wants it as another wonder of the world. Chip sings for a rock band.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Attack of the Cocktopuss
star
6.80
5 votes

#4 - Attack of the Cocktopuss

Season 1 - Episode 12 - Aired 9/5/2000

When the Cocktopuss sets shores on the beach, the mayor wants it as another wonder of the world. Chip sings for a rock band.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Love, Native American Style
star
7.00
38 votes

#5 - Love, Native American Style

Season 1 - Episode 4 - Aired 4/4/2000

Notch is distraught when his step-father, local Indian Chief Pokemon, passes on, and a local casino developer convinces the Kahonee Tribe to construct a casino on their land. Although the deal's crooked, Notch is no Indian giver, and he seeks a legal way to halt construction. Also, Chip's South American relatives need money, so Chip moonlights as a male stripper.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Love, Native American Style
star
7.00
38 votes

#6 - Love, Native American Style

Season 1 - Episode 4 - Aired 4/4/2000

Notch is distraught when his step-father, local Indian Chief Pokemon, passes on, and a local casino developer convinces the Kahonee Tribe to construct a casino on their land. Although the deal's crooked, Notch is no Indian giver, and he seeks a legal way to halt construction. Also, Chip's South American relatives need money, so Chip moonlights as a male stripper.

Directors: Scott McAboy
South of Her Border
star
7.14
36 votes

#7 - South of Her Border

Season 1 - Episode 9 - Aired 8/15/2000

When Notch and the girls travel to the South American nation of Humidor to stop a military coup, they end up in prison instead. The shackles aren't so bad, but the all-bean diet? Ai, ai, ai. Can they escape in time to stop the coup? While the others are gone, Chip runs a junior lifeguard program.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Watch Now:Amazon
South of Her Border
star
7.14
36 votes

#8 - South of Her Border

Season 1 - Episode 9 - Aired 8/15/2000

When Notch and the girls travel to the South American nation of Humidor to stop a military coup, they end up in prison instead. The shackles aren't so bad, but the all-bean diet? Ai, ai, ai. Can they escape in time to stop the coup? While the others are gone, Chip runs a junior lifeguard program.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Watch Now:Amazon
Hamm Stroker's Suck My Blood
star
7.25
4 votes

#9 - Hamm Stroker's Suck My Blood

Season 3 - Episode 8 - Aired 8/6/2002

Directors: Tim Andrew
Hamm Stroker's Suck My Blood
star
7.25
4 votes

#10 - Hamm Stroker's Suck My Blood

Season 3 - Episode 8 - Aired 8/6/2002

Directors: Tim Andrew
You Only Come Once
star
7.33
3 votes

#11 - You Only Come Once

Season 3 - Episode 7 - Aired 7/30/2002

Stinkfinger wants revenge on the people of the world because he didn't get workman's compensation because of an explosion that occured where he was working and he seeks revenge by trying to control the weather around the world. Notch's friend comes to help as Kimberlee, Porcelain, and Notch try to foil Stinkfinger's evil plan. Meanwhile, Jamaica finds out that her mom is a TV talkshow host named ""Okra"" and that she had abandoned Jamaica when she was little and wants her back. Later on, Okra becomes injured in a car accident caused by icy roads and Jamaica donates one of her kidneys to her so she can stay alive.

Directors: Jack Murray
Watch Now:Amazon
The Island of Dr. Merlot
star
7.33
6 votes

#12 - The Island of Dr. Merlot

Season 2 - Episode 11 - Aired 1/19/2001

B.J. and Notch crashes on an island while riding in his airplane, Dr. Merlot decides to make them his throphys.

Directors: John Putch
You Only Come Once
star
7.33
3 votes

#13 - You Only Come Once

Season 3 - Episode 7 - Aired 7/30/2002

Stinkfinger wants revenge on the people of the world because he didn't get workman's compensation because of an explosion that occured where he was working and he seeks revenge by trying to control the weather around the world. Notch's friend comes to help as Kimberlee, Porcelain, and Notch try to foil Stinkfinger's evil plan. Meanwhile, Jamaica finds out that her mom is a TV talkshow host named ""Okra"" and that she had abandoned Jamaica when she was little and wants her back. Later on, Okra becomes injured in a car accident caused by icy roads and Jamaica donates one of her kidneys to her so she can stay alive.

Directors: Jack Murray
Watch Now:Amazon
The Island of Dr. Merlot
star
7.33
6 votes

#14 - The Island of Dr. Merlot

Season 2 - Episode 11 - Aired 1/19/2001

B.J. and Notch crashes on an island while riding in his airplane, Dr. Merlot decides to make them his throphys.

Directors: John Putch
Mario Putzo's... The Last Dong
star
7.38
8 votes

#15 - Mario Putzo's... The Last Dong

Season 1 - Episode 13 - Aired 9/12/2000

Vinnie Fellachio returns to terrorizes the beach. Chip's sister, Ava Rommel visits him, and puts the moves on B.J.

Directors: George Verschoor
Mario Putzo's... The Last Dong
star
7.38
8 votes

#16 - Mario Putzo's... The Last Dong

Season 1 - Episode 13 - Aired 9/12/2000

Vinnie Fellachio returns to terrorizes the beach. Chip's sister, Ava Rommel visits him, and puts the moves on B.J.

Directors: George Verschoor
Silence of the Clams
star
7.50
50 votes

#17 - Silence of the Clams

Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired 3/21/2000

A unpopular girl, doesn't have a date for ""Clamapolooza"" in a end party for the college students spring break. She starts to polute the beach to close this event.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Silence of the Clams
star
7.50
50 votes

#18 - Silence of the Clams

Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired 3/21/2000

A unpopular girl, doesn't have a date for ""Clamapolooza"" in a end party for the college students spring break. She starts to polute the beach to close this event.

Directors: Scott McAboy
It's Showtime at the Apollo 13!
star
7.50
2 votes

#19 - It's Showtime at the Apollo 13!

Season 2 - Episode 10 - Aired 6/12/2001

Jamaica is chosen as the first black lifeguard in space aboard the shuttle <em>Catastrophe</em>; Notch goes undercover at the Robert Downey, Jr. Senior High School when a student hacks into the shuttle computer and endangers the mission.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Grand Prix
star
7.50
4 votes

#20 - Grand Prix

Season 2 - Episode 13 - Aired 7/3/2001

Notch must defend the honor of America in a three-quarter midget car race vs. a man from France. The Frenchman, who goes by the nickname ""The Frenchman"", is married to Notch's old flame, a beautiful French maiden named Nicorette. After her reappearance on the scene, Notch realizes she's a hard habit to break. Meanwhile, B.J. and Jamiaca help save a lesbian bar from going under.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Rod Strikes Back
star
7.50
6 votes

#21 - Rod Strikes Back

Season 2 - Episode 4 - Aired 4/3/2001

Rod returns and wants his revenge on everyone, Especially for B.J.; Chip's dog ""shitsu"" (sp?) arrives at Malibu Adjacent and challenges Steve.

It's Showtime at the Apollo 13!
star
7.50
2 votes

#22 - It's Showtime at the Apollo 13!

Season 2 - Episode 10 - Aired 6/12/2001

Jamaica is chosen as the first black lifeguard in space aboard the shuttle <em>Catastrophe</em>; Notch goes undercover at the Robert Downey, Jr. Senior High School when a student hacks into the shuttle computer and endangers the mission.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Grand Prix
star
7.50
4 votes

#23 - Grand Prix

Season 2 - Episode 13 - Aired 7/3/2001

Notch must defend the honor of America in a three-quarter midget car race vs. a man from France. The Frenchman, who goes by the nickname ""The Frenchman"", is married to Notch's old flame, a beautiful French maiden named Nicorette. After her reappearance on the scene, Notch realizes she's a hard habit to break. Meanwhile, B.J. and Jamiaca help save a lesbian bar from going under.

Directors: Scott McAboy
Rod Strikes Back
star
7.50
6 votes

#24 - Rod Strikes Back

Season 2 - Episode 4 - Aired 4/3/2001

Rod returns and wants his revenge on everyone, Especially for B.J.; Chip's dog ""shitsu"" (sp?) arrives at Malibu Adjacent and challenges Steve.

Booger Nights
star
7.60
5 votes

#25 - Booger Nights

Season 2 - Episode 15 - Aired 7/17/2001

Quotes: Notch: ""Here's a picture of my head. And here's a picture of my face.""

Directors: Scott McAboy