The BEST episodes written by Timothy Stack

#1 - Bad News, Mr. Johnson (3)

Son of the Beach - Season 3 - Episode 14

""Master of disguise"" Notch Johnson is on the run and he spends some time hiding out at Aunt Jizzy's, where he learns that Kooze and Harry have conspired to move up Harry and Kimberlee's wedding date to the next day. Kooze knows Notch will come when he hears this news and he plans to assassinate him at the wedding. Chip finds out he's in imminent danger of being deported. To avoid this, he convinces a reluctant Jamaica to marry him, which is a great shock to his ""Mootie"" and ""Poopie"" when they arrive for the wedding. Porcelain has now come up with a plan to seduce Nick Jr. into marriage so she can get her hands on the Pappasmearos fortune, so it looks like there's going to be a triple wedding at Malibu Adjacent. Notch sneaks into the SPF-30 headquaters looking for evidence against Kooze, but while he's looking, B.J. goes into labor. Notch helps to deliver her baby, after which the surprise identity of the father is revealed. With the help of Chappy, Ellen and Prof. Milosevic, Notch expo

#2 - Area 69

Son of the Beach - Season 2 - Episode 14

When B.J. is impregnated and then abducted, Notch knows that there's trouble afoot. And when his old Vietnam/F.B.I. buddy Captain Enteneille warns Notch to stay off B.J.'s case, Notch knows that it's time to search for the truth. He and Kimberlee head to the famous secret desert installation, Area 69, where Notch learns more than he bargained for. Back in Malibu Adjacent, Chip and Professor Milosevic enter a local talent contest and are signed by a TV network executive to star in a situation comedy. Hilarity ensues.

#3 - Two Thongs Don't Make a Right

Son of the Beach - Season 1 - Episode 5

When Little Peter Gozinya disappears on the beach, Notch and the gang mobilize to find him. And also mobilize to repeal the Mayor's ban on thong bikinis. Which effort will prove successful?

#4 - Queefer Madness

Son of the Beach - Season 2 - Episode 5

The beach is terrorized by a gang of bad boys.

#5 - It's a Nude, Nude, Nude, Nude World

Son of the Beach - Season 2 - Episode 9

The Nude-lympics come to Malibu Adjacent, and someone is killing beautiful, naked women because he feels they are 'Dirty'. Mayor Anita wants to cover up the story, but SPF-30 is at work cracking the case. Kimberlee lands a date with the murderer unaware until he arrives to pick her up that he is the killer of all the women. While on her date, Kimberlee makes a private call to Notch telling him that she is with him but the killer finds out and then tries to kill Kimberlee until Notch and the gang come along to save her.

#6 - The Trial

My Name Is Earl - Season 2 - Episode 23

Things are finally looking up for Earl with a GED, a job, a new apartment and love interest however it may all come crashing down during Joy's trial date. Earl's shocking testimony could help Joy but at what cost?

#7 - A Star Is Boned

Son of the Beach - Season 1 - Episode 11

The glamour of Hollywood is hitting the beaches of Malibu Adjacent: the fabulous stars, the adoring crowds, the death threats. Notch Johnson joins the case when actress Regina Streep is almost killed on his beach. Can Notch find the assailant before they grab Regina? Also, Jamaica runs a bachelor auction.

#8 - Lord of the Ring

Raising Hope - Season 3 - Episode 12

Jimmy participates in medical experiments to raise money for an engagement ring.

#9 - Our 'Cops' is On

My Name Is Earl - Season 2 - Episode 12

It's a trip down memory lane for Earl, Randy, Joy, Darnell and the Crab Shack regulars when they remember their fifteen minutes of fame watching a 2003 repeat of the TV show "Cops," which was filmed in Camden County.

#10 - How I Met Your Mullet

Raising Hope - Season 4 - Episode 21

Jimmy and Sabrina inherit a maid from Sabrina's late grandmother.

#11 - In the G-Hetto

Son of the Beach - Season 1 - Episode 3

When Jamaica is blackmailed into running drugs for a gangsta, Notch insists upon taking her place as the "mule". After all, who else can swallow 13 cocaine-filled condoms and then swim two miles? Also, Chip enters the Mr. Pec pageant. The Mayor's a judge, and she's got a guaranteed way for Chip to win.

#12 - Remember Her Titans

Son of the Beach - Season 2 - Episode 3

Jamaica's boyfriend has a problem with gambling, and is majorly in debt. Since Jamaica's boyfriend doesn't have the money, he is told by the bookie that he will let it slide if he throws the game. When he doesn't agree, he breaks his leg so that he can't play. Notch decides that he will fill in for him at the game and he is allowed to fill in for him because he never finished high school. Meanwhile, Kody's father comes to Malibu Adjacent from the U.K. to ask Kody to go back and live with him.

#13 - Eat My Muffin

Son of the Beach - Season 1 - Episode 7

When BJ muffs a save, she goes into an identity crisis and ends up in the care of The Divine Rod, who runs a home for lost women. And runs a web-site where people pay to watch the women, and Rod, um, ""treating"" them. Under Notch's direction, Kimberlee infiltrates the cult and snatches it's secret: psychotropic-drug-laced bran muffins. Realizing that BJ is under someone else's control, the bran muffins move Notch into action. Meanwhile, the Tetherball Invitational Tournament is in town, and the Mayor's bet that the gang can win.

#14 - With Sex You Get Eggroll

Son of the Beach - Season 1 - Episode 1

The Mayor wants Head Lifeguard Notch Johnson out of Malibu Adjacent, and she's recruited Kimberlee Clark to join his squad and get the low-down on him by wearing a mini-camera. She thinks that her work is done when Notch decides to bust enslaved girls from a whore house from the inside, by posing as a customer. If the slavers don't get Notch, the Mayor's video will. Or will Kimberlee help Notch to save the day?

#15 - A Germ of a Story

Raising Hope - Season 1 - Episode 13

When Sabrina points out to Jimmy just how many germs are lurking around his house, the Chance family becomes obsessed with cleanliness. Finding it impossible to keep Maw Maw clean, they move her to the backyard greenhouse, but after watching some old family movies, they discover a surprising secret that has kept them healthy all these years.

#16 - Inside Probe

Raising Hope - Season 2 - Episode 21

Nancy Grace examines the "real story" of Hope's mom, serial killer Lucy Carlisle, resulting in the Chance family learning some shocking things about her.

#17 - Arbor Daze

Raising Hope - Season 3 - Episode 18

Sabrina is visited by the ghosts of Arbor Day past, present and future.

#18 - It's a Hopeful Life

Raising Hope - Season 2 - Episode 10

In this "It's a Wonderful Life" themed episode, Jimmy is transported into a cinematic dreamlike state and watches on at a world where he never met Lucy. When he returns to reality he realizes that if Hope had never been born, his life wouldn't be as good. Meanwhile, Virginia, Burt and Maw Maw see a movie that bares a striking resemblance to their day-to-day lives.

#19 - Killer Hope

Raising Hope - Season 2 - Episode 5

After discovering that Hope hit a boy at daycare, the family becomes worried that Hope is following in her mother's footsteps. Meanwhile, the Chances run into some problems when they camp out in tents due to their home being fumigated for termites.

#20 - White Lie Christmas

My Name Is Earl - Season 1 - Episode 10

As the holiday season comes under way a few secrets are exposed when Earl attempts to cross number seventy-four off of his list: "always ruined Joy's Christmas." Earl, Randy, and Catalina enter a radio contest to win a brand new car for Joy to make up for all of the thoughtless Christmas presents Earl gave her while they were married. While Randy and Catalina vie over the car, Earl finds out that Joy's parents believe that he's still their son-in-law and that he's just returned from the war in Iraq. Joy is afraid to tell her father, an alleged racist, that she is now married to Darnell, so Earl plays the part, afraid of ruining another one of her Christmases. Recap: Of course this episode is again about doing things right, but with a little difference: This time there are other people too who, well didn't do all bad things BUT they all have secrets. This episode begins with a contest. The contest consists of the following. You have to keep at least one hand on the Car which you can win at all times. (I think it's a Dodge Neon.. but I am not sure), Why does Earl want to win the contest when he got a perfectly fine '73 Al Camino with nice '77 Door and a 1987 Camero Transmission.? Of course! It's for the List! Number 74: 'Always ruined Joys Christmas'. You see a few examples. 2002: He gives her something that looks like empty shell casings and gets asked: What shall I use them for? And he says: Whatever you like. 2003: She gets flavored condoms 2004: She gets Keys and says: "Wait, these are my keys?" and he says: "Yes, I found them" (Very funny moment in this episode). Well, we are back at the contest. His brothers asks: "What does she need a new car for, she already has one" After that you see a extremely funny scene (and a little sad) where she and Darnell get out of the car .. and you see the two children in the back in the middle of the rain. And that kinda makes the point for earl. Back at the contest. Just when it began Earl shakes Randy's hand, and a

#21 - Mario Putzo's... The Last Dong

Son of the Beach - Season 1 - Episode 13

Vinnie Fellachio returns to terrorizes the beach. Chip's sister, Ava Rommel visits him, and puts the moves on B.J.

#22 - Inside Probe (2)

My Name Is Earl - Season 4 - Episode 26

The mystery of the disappearance of the former Crab Shack owner is finally resolved.

#23 - The Magic Hour

My Name Is Earl - Season 4 - Episode 1

When Joy cons Make-A-Wish to send a celebrity to her trailer, Earl remembers a wish he stole from a dying child and decides it's time to cross him off the list. When he returns to the kid's home, he finds that little Buddy (guest star Seth Green) has exceeded all of the doctors' expectations and is still alive. Buddy asks Earl to produce his movie and suddenly all of Camden County find themselves starring in a high-octane action film. Randy surprises everyone when his acting skills get rave reviews.

#24 - Romeo and Romeo

Raising Hope - Season 1 - Episode 12

Jimmy hasn't had any time to socialize or make friends since Hope was born, so when he meets another single dad at the grocery store, he immediately sets up a play date. But when Jimmy finds out that Virginia is his new friend's housekeeper, Virginia insists that Jimmy cancel the outing. In an effort to keep the peace, Jimmy and his friend arrange a dinner at the Chance house.

#25 - Rod Strikes Back

Son of the Beach - Season 2 - Episode 4

Rod returns and wants his revenge on everyone, Especially for B.J.; Chip's dog ""shitsu"" (sp?) arrives at Malibu Adjacent and challenges Steve.

#26 - Booger Nights

Son of the Beach - Season 2 - Episode 15

Quotes: Notch: ""Here's a picture of my head. And here's a picture of my face.""

#27 - Silence of the Clams

Son of the Beach - Season 1 - Episode 2

A unpopular girl, doesn't have a date for ""Clamapolooza"" in a end party for the college students spring break. She starts to polute the beach to close this event.

#28 - The Island of Dr. Merlot

Son of the Beach - Season 2 - Episode 11

B.J. and Notch crashes on an island while riding in his airplane, Dr. Merlot decides to make them his throphys.

#29 - Our Other Cops is On! (1)

My Name Is Earl - Season 3 - Episode 7

#30 - Lost in Space (2)

Family Matters - Season 9 - Episode 22

Urkel has to come to the rescue when a wandering satellite punctures the spacecraft in which he's traveling, preventing him and a team of astronauts from re-entering the Earth's atmosphere. With the two other astronauts on board unconscious, it's up to Urkel to repair the ship -- from the outside. Meanwhile, as Carl tries to help Harriette understand her son's need to be a police officer, Eddie's meter maid duty takes a dangerous turn. Urkel releases the satellite but starts floating away and was really in peril, but was able to use the satellite's thrusters to make it back to the spacecraft and return home to Laura.

#31 - Hamm Stroker's Suck My Blood

Son of the Beach - Season 3 - Episode 8

#32 - Attack of the Cocktopuss

Son of the Beach - Season 1 - Episode 12

When the Cocktopuss sets shores on the beach, the mayor wants it as another wonder of the world. Chip sings for a rock band.

#33 - South of Her Border

Son of the Beach - Season 1 - Episode 9

When Notch and the girls travel to the South American nation of Humidor to stop a military coup, they end up in prison instead. The shackles aren't so bad, but the all-bean diet? Ai, ai, ai. Can they escape in time to stop the coup? While the others are gone, Chip runs a junior lifeguard program.

#34 - A Mind is a Terrible Thing to Read

Family Matters - Season 9 - Episode 6

Urkel doesn't mind at all when a chemistry experiment allows him to eavesdrop on the thoughts of everyone around him, but being able to hear what people are thinking soon becomes far too overwhelming. Meanwhile, Carol becomes a troop leader for the Junior Woodsmen.

#35 - Lost in Space (1)

Family Matters - Season 9 - Episode 21

The long-running family sitcom that made Urkel a nerd for the ages comes to a close after nine seasons. The two-part series finale sends Urkel into space as a student astronaut. It seems NASA wants to test his prize-winning artificial-gravity invention in space - with him on board. Unfortunately, this means that Urkel will have to postpone his other mission: to marry Laura. Meanwhile, back on terra firma, Harriette conspires to get Eddie reassigned to a precinct desk job out of fear for his safety.