The BEST episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000
Every episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000 ever, ranked from best to worst by thousands of votes from fans of the show. The best episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000!
In the not-too-distant future, various test subjects are held captive by mad scientists and evil villains aboard the Satellite of Love, where they are forced to watch cheesy B-grade movies with the help of their robot friends: Cambot, Gypsy, Tom Servo and Crow T. Robot.
#1 - The Pumaman
Season 9 - Episode 3 - Aired 4/4/1998
Movie Plot: A man discovers that he is an Aztec god-like creature that has the power of a Puma. Intro: Servo comes down with "Short Man's Disease." Segment One: Pearl is holding a fancy dress ball at the same time that Brain Guy is throwing a normal party. Servo gets into mingling for Pearl's ball. Segment Two: Mike enlists the help of Shelli the Nanite to give his hair the "dry look." Segment Three: The 'bots force Mike to dress as Cotamundi Man. Segment Four: Crow and Servo create a voodoo head of Roger Whittaker. Segment Five: Crow resigns, then accepts a lower pay to do the same job. In Castle Forrester, Brain Guy's party is more popular than Pearl's ball. Roger Whittaker stops by for a visit. Stinger: Puma Man is befuddled. Original film made in 1980.
#2 - Manos: The Hands of Fate
Season 4 - Episode 24 - Aired 1/30/1993
Movie Plot: A family on a long car trip end up lost and at the house of the evil "Master". Also riffed was: The second part of the Chevy training film "Hired!" Intro: Joel installs a program in the 'bots so that they think he is a genius. Segment One: Joel invents a machine to make unfunny comic strips funny by combining them. In Deep 13, The Mads invent a guillotine for chocolate bunnies. Segment Two: The crew go on a fake car trip, when redneck cop Gypsy pulls them over, they end up breaking down in tears about how bad the movie is. Frank calls to apologize for the movie. Segment Three The crew discusses what makes a monster so monstrous. Segment Four: Joel dresses up as "The Master" with Crow as tag-along Hellbeast. Dr. Forrester calls to apologize for the movie. Segment Five: Crow and Servo wrestle like the brides of Manos in the movie. In Deep 13, the Mads' pizza is delivered by Torgo. It takes a long time to get there. Original film made in 1966.
#3 - Space Mutiny
Season 8 - Episode 20 - Aired 11/7/1997
Movie Plot: A group of spaceship passengers rebel against the ship's captain. On the SOL: Mike gets a new set of encyclopedias to replace the old one that the 'bots kept complaining about / Servo and Crow crash the last of the SOL's escape pods / Servo installs a bit too much safety gear on the SOL / Crow shows off his new muscles. In Ancient Rome: Pearl, Bobo, and Brain Guy are in the dungeon. Brain Guy attempts to bring Mike down to help, but the Romans have taken away his brain, leaving him powerless / Bobo throws up a possible means of escape / Mike distracts Flavia while Brain Guy busts Bobo and Pearl out. Bobo then sets the city on fire. Original film made in 1988.
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#4 - Final Justice
Season 10 - Episode 7 - Aired 6/20/1999
Movie Plot: A Texas sheriff runs amok in Malta after a mobster who killed his partner. Intro: Servo ponders if the owner of a lonely heart is really better than the owner of a broken heart. Segment One: In Castle Forrester, Pearl, Brain Guy, and Bobo demonstrate how to put humor into the workplace. Segment Two: The crew tries to complain to Pearl about the repetition in the movie by making Mike trip multiple times. Segment Three: Goosio visits the SOL as a goodwill ambassador, but the 'bots kill it. Segment Four: Crow delivers a speech about Maltese men. Segment Five: Since Joel escaped after a Joe Don Baker movie, Mike assumes its his turn. He's really just sitting in the water heater. The 'bots comfort him. In Castle Forrester, Pearl and Bobo are demonstrating "funny dress-up day" to improve workplace morale. Pearl is dressed up in wacky colors, Bobo dresses as Joe Don Baker from the movie. Brain Guy appears in leather biker gear, but informs them that it isn't for dress-up. Original film made in 1985.
#5 - Godzilla vs. Megalon
Season 2 - Episode 12 - Aired 1/19/1991
Movie Plot: The Japanese monsters Godzilla and Megalon fight each other. Intro: The crew puts on a 60-minutes-type show. Segment One: The crew celebrates Halloween. In Deep 13, Dr. Forrester dresses up as a foosball goalie and Frank as a Geordi LaForge. Segment Two: The 'bots argue about who has a more powerful monster. Segment Three: The crew shows a montage of this movie's hero: Rex dart. Segment Four: Servo and Crow put on a weird play about Orville Redenbacher. Segment Five: Joel gives Crow and servo new arms. Frank gets angry at his Mario Bros. video game. Original film made in 1973, released in US in 1976.
#6 - Werewolf
Season 9 - Episode 4 - Aired 4/18/1998
Movie Plot: A man on a archaeological dig becomes a werewolf. Intro: Mike pretends to be James Lipton. Segment One: With the SOL in geosynchronous orbit, he uses a ladder to climb down to Earth. Mike's ladder escape is ruined when he ends up in the castle. Segment Two: Mike and Servo play "Who do you want in your werewolf movie?" Segment Three: Mike and the 'bots sing a song about the movie. Segment Four: Mike becomes a werecrow. Segment Five: Servo becomes a weremike. Pearl wants to make a werewolf, but can only find a cocker spaniel to use. Original film made in 1996.
#7 - The Magic Voyage of Sinbad
Season 5 - Episode 5 - Aired 8/14/1993
Movie Plot: Sinbad returns home from a trip to find his people in need of great help. On the SOL: Crow fixes an award show, much to Servo's chagrin / Joel invents a cheese set modeled after the Rat Pack / the Crew acts like the Jester from the movie / Crow fires himself out the air lock to go on a voyage like Sinbad. In Deep 13: The Mads present "Chin-derwear." It is exactly what you think it is. Original film made in 1953.
#8 - Operation Double 007
Season 5 - Episode 8 - Aired 9/11/1993
Movie Plot: The evil "Mr. Thayer" attempts to take over the world by freezing all machinery. Stars Sean Connery's brother, Neil. On the SOL: Joel shows some old home movies / Crow invents a variation on the bird that dips and drinks from a glass of water / Joel, mocking the cheesy visuals of the movie, wants a back rub / the crew compares the careers of the Connery brothers / Dr. Forrester's magnetizer causes the 'bots to stick to the walls. An old Russian satellite, complete with dog, also gets stuck to the SOL. In Deep 13: Frank is in a very Bavarian mood, inventing ""Lederhosen-hosen"", pants with a hose through them. He gets depressed when he realizes how lame it is / Torgo stops by to deliver some "Mr. Pibb"s the the Mads ordered / Dr. Forrester magnetizes the SOL, and Frank tries to speak German. Original film made in 1967.
#9 - Pod People
Season 3 - Episode 3 - Aired 6/15/1991
Movie Plot: Alien beings hatch on earth after a meteor crash. On the SOL: The SOL hosts an art festival / The crew sings a nonsense song. In Deep 13: The Mads have a very lame Karaoke machine. Original film made in 1983.
#10 - Night of the Blood Beast
Season 7 - Episode 1 - Aired 2/3/1996
Movie Plot: After a rocket crash, an alien beast starts to attack people in southern California. Also riffed was the short "Once Upon a Honeymoon." On the SOL: The 'bots attack Mike with Mace and tasers / Crow plays the trombone / Gypsy imitates the woman from the short / Crow pretends to be pregnant. In Deep 13: Dr. Forrester's mother, Pearl, has moved in with him. She forces him to do a trombone recital / Pearl makes Dr. Forrester confess to the SOL crew, but he doesn't know what he is supposed to be confessing / Pearl treats Dr. Forrester like a baby. Stinger: "Wounded animal that large isn't good." Original film made in 1958.
#11 - Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders
Season 10 - Episode 13 - Aired 9/12/1999
Movie Plot: An old man tells his grandson a story about the magician Merlin. Intro: The Crew pulls old-school college pranks. Segment One: Pearl makes Servo the SOL's supreme dictator, to see if that makes the experiment more evil. Segment Two: Servo and Crow review each other. Neither likes the other. Segment Three: Servo turns Mike into a baby. Segment Four: Mike shows off his Ernest Borgnine kids books. Segment Five: Pearl sends Bobo to the SOL to torture Mike and the 'bots. They send him back. Original film made in 1996.
#12 - Diabolik
Season 10 - Episode 12 - Aired 8/8/1999
Movie Plot: A super spy tries to steal a large chunk of gold. Intro: Servo finds the SOL employee handbook, which is written in typical Forrester dictator style. Segment One: Pearl has hooked the SOL up to a joystick and starts to mess with the crew. The joystick breaks and initiates the SOL's re-entry system. Brain Guy and Pearl are helpless to stop the SOL's return, which has Pearl quite upset. Segment Two: Servo disposes of the many Servo clones on the ship. Segment Three: The residents of the castle are moving on with life: Pearl becomes dictator for life of Qatar, Bobo gets a "job" at the zoo, and Brain Guy becomes the oracle of a planet. Segment Four: Crow is nervous about going to Earth, so Mike writes a song to make him feel better. Crow feels better, but the song makes Servo afraid. Segment Five: The residents of the Castle do a Mary Tyler Moore style good bye. The SOL violently crashlands on Earth. Gypsy starts a successfull Fortune 500 company called ConGypsCo. Mike, Servo and Crow settle into their small apartment to watch the strangely familiar "The Crawling Eye" Original film made in 1968.
#13 - Samson vs. the Vampire Women
Season 6 - Episode 24 - Aired 3/25/1995
Movie Plot: A wrestler is hired to save a young woman from a group of vampires. On the SOL: the Crew does a tribute to the 3 Stooges / Crow receives a bizarre message / the 'bots read tribute letters to the departed Frank. In Deep 13: The Mads get a strange message in a fortune cookie / the angel Torgo the White comes to take Frank to "Second Banana Heaven" / Dr. Forrester, upset by Frank's departure, sings a tribute / the ghost of Frank visits Dr. Forrester and pushes the button for the last time. Original film made in 1962.
#14 - Overdrawn at the Memory Bank
Season 8 - Episode 22 - Aired 12/6/1997
Movie Plot: A man's mind gets sucked into a massive computer system. Intro: Crow creates a catch phrase for himself. Segment One: Pearl asks the 'bots to make a catch phrase for Mike. Pearl decides to make money by having her own PBS station, and hosting a pledge drive. Segment Two: The 'bots order a pet monkey over the internet. Segment Three: The bots' monkey does not like Mike. As an example of other Pearl-based programming, Pearl and Brain guy sing a duet. Segment Four: Servo is beat up by some rough Nanites. Segment Five: Bobo comes up to the SOL to help with the monkey, but ends up turning against Mike and the 'bots. Meanwhile, Pearl counts the money her pledge drive made. Original film made in 1983.
#15 - Agent for H.A.R.M.
Season 8 - Episode 15 - Aired 8/2/1997
Movie Plot: A 1960s secret agent is charged to protect a scientist who has created a really dumb biological weapon. On the SOL: Servo and Crow are into some Extreme Hobbies / Servo tries to find a legal way to help Mike / the 'bots make sure Mike does his community service. In the Intergalactic Courtroom: Mike is charged for his recent planet destructions. Pearl is the prosecutor, Bobo is the defense attorney / Bobo is not defending Mike very well / Servo and Crow's testimony does not seem to help Mike either / Bobo traps Brain Guy in a lie on the stand / Mike is convicted, but his death sentence is negotiated down to community service. Stinger: Spaz chop. Original film made in 1966.
#16 - Soultaker
Season 10 - Episode 1 - Aired 4/11/1999
Movie Plot: The souls of 4 teenagers are being hunted by a soultaker. Intro: The 'bots have a wet t-shirt contest. They don't seem to grasp the point, and leave Mike confused. Commercial sign doesn't come on when it's supposed to, leaving Mike to have to push the button. Segment One: Cambot picks up some odd interference. Gypsy informs Mike that the ship is having serious malfunctions. Meanwhile, in Castle Forrester, Pearl, Bobo, and Brain Guy are playing Monopoly. They couldn't care less about the SOL. Segment Two: Gypsy, and other parts of the ship, are seriously malfunctioning. Mike takes charge, but only succeeds in breaking the Hexfield Viewscreen. Segment Three: The SOL, still malfunctioning, is caught in another ship's tractor beam. In Castle Forrester, a soultaker comes for Bobo's soul. It turns out to be TV's Frank, who became a soultaker when he realized that second banana heaven wasn't all that great. Segment Four: The person from the other ship boards the SOL. Original film made in 1990.
#17 - Mitchell
Season 5 - Episode 12 - Aired 7/30/1993
Movie Plot: Mitchell is a cop who doesn't follow proper policy. He messes up everything in the movie yet manages to come out the hero. Intro: Joel shows the 'bots his toothpick Monticello model. They, of course, plot its destruction. Segment One: The 'bots have destroyed Monticello. In Deep 13, the Mads are being audited, so they have hired a temp to help get things organized. Frank enjoys yelling at the temp, a guy named Mike Nelson. Segment Two: Joel and the bots go on an Outward Bound trip to the heart of the ship. Gypsy, meanwhile overhears the Mads' plans to kill Mike, but mishears and thinks they plan to kill Joel. Segment Three: Gypsy tries to find a way to get Joel off the ship and save him from the Mads. Despite her concern, Joel doesn't want to go. Segment Four: Gypsy asks Mike for help in getting Joel off the ship. He gets the keys to the SOL controls from Frank and informs Gypsy that there is an escape pod hidden on the ship. Segment Five: Gypsy uses the ship's only escape pod to send Joel home. Original film made in 1975.
#18 - The Magic Sword
Season 4 - Episode 11 - Aired 8/29/1992
Movie Plot: A knight longs for the love of a princess, but is constantly rebuffed. On the SOL: Joel draws nude caricatures of the 'bots / The crew wears "Big Gulp Berets" / the gang puts on a play about the Middle Ages / the crew talks about moderately bad words like "booger". In Deep 13: Dr. Forrester has created toxic pillows which emit a toxic gas, which eats away Frank's flesh. Original film made in 1962.
#19 - The Beast of Yucca Flats
Season 6 - Episode 21 - Aired 1/21/1995
Movie Plot: A scientist is mutated by a nuclear explosion into the Beast of Yucca Flats, which goes around randomly killing people. Also riffed were the shorts "Money Talks" and "Progress Island." On the SOL: the Crew wallpapers the SOL / the crew is disturbed by a party next door / Crow supports the ""Film Anti-preservation Society"", for the decay of bad films. In Deep 13: A political rally over Proposition Deep 13. The Mads rally in favor, the SOL crew rebuts / The Mads concede the issue to Mike and the 'bots. Original film made in 1961.
#20 - Santa Claus
Season 5 - Episode 21 - Aired 12/24/1993
Movie Plot: Satan sends Pitch, one of his demons, to harass Santa by making the world's children evil. On the SOL: The Crew tries caroling, but it soon breaks down / The crew exchanges Christmas gifts / the 'bots try to get Mike in touch with his family, but get a wrong number / the 'bots sing a politically correct Christmas carol. In Deep 13: The Mads exchange gifts / both Santa and Pitch stop by for a visit and end up wrestling each other. Original film made in 1959.
#21 - The Girl in Lovers' Lane
Season 5 - Episode 9 - Aired 9/18/1993
Movie Plot: A couple of drifters deal with love and prostitution. On the SOL: Crow and Servo get belly buttons / Joel mixes fashionable footwear with cartoon feet / Crow and Servo try to suck an egg into a vacuum. In Deep 13: The Mads present ideas for evil handouts at sports events like "Brass Knuckle Night" / Dr. Forrester puts a railroad spike through Frank's head. Original film made in 1959.
#22 - Hobgoblins
Season 9 - Episode 7 - Aired 6/27/1998
Movie Plot: Goblins wreak havoc when they escape from a movie studio. Intro: The crew of the SOL keeps turning each other on. Segment One: The crew rough-houses on the couch Pearl sent them. Segment Two: Crow makes a film questioning the existence of women. Segment Three: Crow starts a hotline for people who have suffered trauma from watching this movie. Only Bobo calls in to talk about his love life. Segment Four: The crew uses cardboard cutouts to distract Pearl while they try to escape. Segment Five: Servo goes back in time to punish Rick Sloane for making this movie. In the Castle, Pearl lectures Mike and the 'bots on how she can no longer trust them with furniture. Original film made in 1988.
#23 - The Final Sacrifice
Season 9 - Episode 10 - Aired 7/25/1998
Movie Plot: The story of a Canadian cult and a lost city. Intro: The bots loot the SOL during a power outage. Segment One: Pearl plans to take over the world one person at a time, starting with Todd Gunderson. Segment Two: Servo does a tribute to Canada. Segment Three: Everyone but Mike gets bad hockey hair Segment Four: As a result of being immune to Hockey Hair, Mike comes down with Grizzly Old Prospector Syndrome. Segment Five: The 'bots start a non-threatening, muffin based cult. Pearl's plan has moved onto victim #2. Stinger: Troy asks for Rowsdower. Original film made in 1990.
#24 - Jack Frost
Season 8 - Episode 13 - Aired 7/12/1997
Movie Plot: A really weird Scandinavian movie about a woman whose ugly sister throws her out and she goes to Jack Frost for help to find her dream husband. On the SOL: Mike is the "Lord of the Dance" / Yakov Smirnoff comes to talk about the film / Earl Torgeson of Sanford, Maine visits and tries to explain the movie. On the Camping Planet: Pearl is still gone, and Bobo and Brain Guy argue over who is in charge / Brain Guy and Bobo grow closer / Mike, Bobo, Brain Guy, and Pearl debate what is the best ape movie ever made. Stinger: "Bring on my fiancé!" Original film made in 1964.
#25 - The Touch of Satan
Season 9 - Episode 8 - Aired 7/11/1998
Movie Plot: A man ends up on a farm with a witch and a woman posessed by Satan. Intro: Mike has no wassail of his own, but finds some in a can. Segment One: Pearl has gone on a trip and left Bobo and Brain Guy in the hands of Steffi the babysitter, who treats Brain Guy like a baby, and Bobo as a pet. Segment Two: Mike takes up walnut farming while Servo takes up pecan farming. Segment Three: Crow thinks he's a witch. Segment Four: Servo's grandma attempts to kill Mike. Segment Five: Crow sells his soul to Stan Johnson, an accountant who trades souls as commodities. Original film made in 1971.