The BEST episodes of Horrible Histories (2009)

Every episode of Horrible Histories (2009) ever, ranked from best to worst by thousands of votes from fans of the show. The best episodes of Horrible Histories (2009)!

Sketches, cartoons and quizzes liberally splattered with blood and gore, based on the books published by Scholastic.

Last Updated: 6/2/2023Network:CBBC
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Cracking Christmas
star
10.00
1 votes

#1 - Cracking Christmas

Season 9 - Episode 6 - Aired 12/10/2021

Horrible Histories brings you a cracking Christmas special, delving into the origins of the festive season.

Savage Songs Special
star
10.00
1 votes

#2 - Savage Songs Special

Season 7 - Episode 13 - Aired 5/7/2018

An episode featuring some of history's finest songs (from the series, admittedly), as Rattus attempts to put together his own festival (the delightfully-named "Glastonsmelly"). From singing poos to tuneful Warlords, there's something for all musical tastes! Rattus has somehow also roped Brad from The Vamps in to help him out, although rather than playing live on the main stage, Brad's role seems to be more about unblocking the toilets just behind it...

Watch Now:Amazon
Episode 1
star
9.13
46 votes

#3 - Episode 1

Season 3 - Episode 1 - Aired 5/30/2011

Meet an annoying French prankster from the Middle Ages, witness bizarre Aztec food on Historical Masterchef, see what happens when Queen Elizabeth I needs the toilet, and learn how not to impress a woman in Victorian times -a painful lesson in manners. The truth about Dick Turpin in song; certainly no New Romantic.

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Amazing Ancient Civilisations Special
star
9.00
1 votes

#4 - Amazing Ancient Civilisations Special

Season 7 - Episode 14 - Aired 5/7/2018

Horrible Histories presents our guide to Ancient Civilisations, featuring new sketches about Alexander the Great's first kiss, Emperor Nero's greatest hits, and how double parking in ancient times could result in being impaled, rather than fined. Also, Swill Gumbitz takes a look at Greek statues, the musical instrument that could make you poo yourself, and the evolution of bottom-wiping.

Fashion Faux Pas
star
9.00
2 votes

#5 - Fashion Faux Pas

Season 8 - Episode 2 - Aired 6/3/2019

The Horrible History of (sometimes literally) dressing to kill. Henry VIII has beef over whose armour is best and Louis XV dresses as a hedge.

Episode 2
star
8.98
51 votes

#6 - Episode 2

Season 4 - Episode 2 - Aired 4/10/2012

Henry VIII appears on a TV show hoping to raise money from his antique abbeys. Also, Charles Darwin sings about his theory of Natural Selection, and a pirate captain aims to be Lord Sugar's next Historical Apprentice.

Watch Now:Amazon
Episode 1
star
8.87
54 votes

#7 - Episode 1

Season 4 - Episode 1 - Aired 4/9/2012

Dick Whittington pitches a movie about his life, Stone Age technology geeks queue for hours at the unveiling of the Bronze Age, and some German bomber pilots find an unfortunate use for a tourist guidebook to Britain.

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Episode 2
star
8.72
53 votes

#8 - Episode 2

Season 3 - Episode 2 - Aired 5/31/2011

Some medieval knights discover the most disgusting way to attack a castle, the Saxons demonstrate the stupidest way to lose a battle, a Georgian goes shopping in a modern pet shop, and the kings and queens of England demonstrate how to remember them all, through the power of song.

Watch Now:AmazoniTunes
Deadly Dynasties
star
8.00
3 votes

#9 - Deadly Dynasties

Season 7 - Episode 12 - Aired 5/7/2018

Horrible Histories takes a look at some of the most famous families that have shaped the world, including the Romanovs of Russia, the Tudors of England, and Ramesses and his children in Ancient Egypt ... all 162 of them! The First Emperor of China Qin Shi Huang takes the mic, and Rattus invites his nephew, Scrappus, to help explore the Great Rattus dynasty, but as we discover families are never straight forward.

Heroic Home Front
star
8.00
1 votes

#10 - Heroic Home Front

Season 8 - Episode 9 - Aired 9/9/2019

A look at how World War II played out on the home front, featuring Churchill's secret loo, the heroic 'ATA Girls' and German spies being caught out by their delicious sausages.

Watch Now:Amazon
Dastardly Dance
star
8.00
1 votes

#11 - Dastardly Dance

Season 9 - Episode 5 - Aired 11/26/2021

Strictly’s Shirley Ballas joins Rattus for a waltz through the history of dance, with Bruno Tonioli as Nero, who had his dance teacher killed, and Queen Vic’s Highland reel!

Episode 13
star
8.00
6 votes

#12 - Episode 13

Season 5 - Episode 13 - Aired 7/22/2013

Some of history's greatest characters serenade us with tales of their lives. Featuring the all-conquering Alexander the Great, the cash-loving Crassus, the feisty Joan of Arc, the brilliant but miserable Charles Dickens, and the very determined Rosa Parks.

Watch Now:Amazon
Episode 1
star
7.79
129 votes

#13 - Episode 1

Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired 4/16/2009

A pirate captain worries about an early bedtime, a soldier from World War I struggles to cook with fake food and the four King Georges form a boy band.

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Episode 13
star
7.76
50 votes

#14 - Episode 13

Season 1 - Episode 13 - Aired 7/9/2009

A lazy aristocrat invents the sandwich, the Romans host their own revolting cookery show and William Shakespeare is haunted by the ghost of King Richard III.

Watch Now:Amazon
Episode 3
star
7.71
49 votes

#15 - Episode 3

Season 3 - Episode 3 - Aired 6/1/2011

A confused World War I soldier spends his first day in the trenches, William Wallace launches his music career as a rock rebel, Lady Jane Grey wins a frankly terrible competition, and the Welsh women of Fishguard defeat a French invasion without even trying.

Watch Now:AmazoniTunes
Heroic Heroes & Villainous Villains
star
7.67
6 votes

#16 - Heroic Heroes & Villainous Villains

Season 7 - Episode 5 - Aired 8/14/2017

Horrible Histories takes a look at the world's greatest heroes and villains. On the heroic side, we have everything from Douglas Bader's frequent escapes to the first men on the moon and Martin Luther King Jr, whereas our more villainous side contains Al Capone and Rameses the Great, and Steve Biceps brings us History's Deadly 60.

Episode 7
star
7.63
60 votes

#17 - Episode 7

Season 1 - Episode 7 - Aired 5/28/2009

There is a terrible smell in the Houses of Parliament, Cinderella struggles with the Blitz, and Helen of Troy reveals her complicated love life.

Watch Now:Amazon
Ridiculous Romantics
star
7.60
10 votes

#18 - Ridiculous Romantics

Season 7 - Episode 3 - Aired 7/31/2017

Horrible Histories charts the path towards true love. Henry VIII enlists the help of maitre d' Fred Sirieix as he tries to find the right wife on Historic First Dates. Elsewhere, we sample some medieval Munich love magic, see how Renaissance men tried to impress the ladies, listen to some of history's greatest love letters, and watch as King Alfonso of Spain's wedding takes a turn he's not expecting...

Watch Now:Amazon
Episode 1
star
7.59
51 votes

#19 - Episode 1

Season 5 - Episode 1 - Aired 5/27/2013

The Saxon gods form an unlikely team of superheroes; famous astronaut Neil Armstrong reveals his new weight loss programme; we meet Georgian London's crime-fighting genius, and Rosa Parks sings about her struggle for equality.

Watch Now:Amazon
Horrid Health
star
7.57
7 votes

#20 - Horrid Health

Season 7 - Episode 10 - Aired 9/18/2017

A look at the hideous history of health, from the invention of toilet paper to the healthy origins of the cornflake. Along the way we discover that the Mayans believe that drinking wee could cure all ills, that the Tudors had to teach themselves how to swim again (everyone had forgotten), Victorians had a taste in beauty products that was literally shocking, and we take an in-depth look at Louis XIV's bottom problems.

Ingenious Inventors
star
7.57
7 votes

#21 - Ingenious Inventors

Season 7 - Episode 6 - Aired 8/21/2017

Mankind's most ingenious inventors are given the Horrible Histories treatment, as we take in everything from the invention of the wheel to the crisp. Featuring the Gutenberg press, the man who invented both the dictionary (very successfully) and manned flight (less successfully). Also the Greeks and the Chinese battle as to which of them are history's best inventors.

Episode 5
star
7.53
59 votes

#22 - Episode 5

Season 1 - Episode 5 - Aired 5/14/2009

A priest makes a piano from live pigs, Emperor Caligula declares war on the sea, and there are some disgusting beauty tips from Ancient Egypt.

Watch Now:Amazon
Episode 4
star
7.51
67 votes

#23 - Episode 4

Season 1 - Episode 4 - Aired 5/7/2009

The Tudors sing their family history, Bob explains the complete history of Rome in two minutes, and a mad Victorian gentleman eats King Louis XIV's mummified heart.

Watch Now:Amazon
Exceptional Explorers
star
7.50
6 votes

#24 - Exceptional Explorers

Season 7 - Episode 2 - Aired 7/24/2017

Horrible Histories goes pear-shaped in an explorers special, meeting Christopher Columbus as he tries to teach a class that the world is indeed shaped like a pear. On the strict instructions of Emperor Nero, some hapless Roman centurions are quite literally stuck in the mud, searching for the source of the Nile. And intrepid Arctic explorer Peter Freuchen has to dig his way out of the snow with a frozen poo. From the Vikings' first small steps on American soil to humankind's first giant leaps on the moon, join Horrible Histories on this epic adventure.

Episode 6
star
7.48
56 votes

#25 - Episode 6

Season 1 - Episode 6 - Aired 5/21/2009

An evil Greek god appears on a daytime chat show, a rich Georgian swaps his wife with a peasant, and we meet some weird medieval monsters.

Watch Now:Amazon

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