The BEST Episodes of Horrible Histories (2009)
Every episode ever - ranked by fan votes!
Last Updated: Sep 17, 2020
Network: BBC One
Sketches, cartoons and quizzes liberally splattered with blood and gore, based on the books published by Scholastic.
#1 - Episode 1
Season 3 - Episode 1 - Aired May 30, 2011
Meet an annoying French prankster from the Middle Ages, witness bizarre Aztec food on Historical Masterchef, see what happens when Queen Elizabeth I needs the toilet, and learn how not to impress a woman in Victorian times -a painful lesson in manners. The truth about Dick Turpin in song; certainly no New Romantic.
9.23 
#2 - Episode 2
Season 4 - Episode 2 - Aired Apr 10, 2012
Henry VIII appears on a TV show hoping to raise money from his antique abbeys. Also, Charles Darwin sings about his theory of Natural Selection, and a pirate captain aims to be Lord Sugar's next Historical Apprentice.
9.02 
#3 - Episode 2
Season 3 - Episode 2 - Aired May 31, 2011
Some medieval knights discover the most disgusting way to attack a castle, the Saxons demonstrate the stupidest way to lose a battle, a Georgian goes shopping in a modern pet shop, and the kings and queens of England demonstrate how to remember them all, through the power of song.
9.02 
#4 - Episode 1
Season 4 - Episode 1 - Aired Apr 9, 2012
Dick Whittington pitches a movie about his life, Stone Age technology geeks queue for hours at the unveiling of the Bronze Age, and some German bomber pilots find an unfortunate use for a tourist guidebook to Britain.
9.00 
#5 - Savage Songs Special
Season 5 - Episode 13 - Aired Jul 23, 2013
Some of history's greatest characters serenade us with tales of their lives. Featuring the all-conquering Alexander the Great, the cash-loving Crassus, the feisty Joan of Arc, the brilliant but miserable Charles Dickens and the very determined Rosa Parks.
8.40 
#6 - Heroic Heroes & Villainous Villains
Season 7 - Episode 5 - Aired Aug 14, 2017
Horrible Histories takes a look at the world's greatest heroes and villains. On the heroic side, we have everything from Douglas Bader's frequent escapes to the first men on the moon and Martin Luther King Jr, whereas our more villainous side contains Al Capone and Rameses the Great, and Steve Biceps brings us History's Deadly 60.
8.00 
#7 - Deadly Dynasties
Season 7 - Episode 12 - Aired May 7, 2018
Horrible Histories takes a look at some of the most famous families that have shaped the world, including the Romanovs of Russia, the Tudors of England, and Ramesses and his children in Ancient Egypt ... all 162 of them! The First Emperor of China Qin Shi Huang takes the mic, and Rattus invites his nephew, Scrappus, to help explore the Great Rattus dynasty, but as we discover families are never straight forward.
8.00 
#8 - Fashion Faux Pas
Season 8 - Episode 2 - Aired Jun 3, 2019
The Horrible History of (sometimes literally) dressing to kill. Henry VIII has beef over whose armour is best and Louis XV dresses as a hedge.
8.00 
#9 - Heroic Home Front
Season 8 - Episode 9 - Aired Sep 9, 2019
A look at how World War II played out on the home front, featuring Churchill's secret loo, the heroic 'ATA Girls' and German spies being caught out by their delicious sausages.
8.00 
#10 - Ridiculous Romance
Season 5 - Episode 14 - Aired Feb 14, 2014
We find out what happens when Henry VIII takes part in TV show Dating In Darkness and meets latest love Anne of Cleves, discover the problems encountered by Queen Elizabeth I’s portrait artist, and are treated to romantic musical interludes from The Love Rats Club, plus Queen Victoria as she duets with Prince Albert. We also say hello to Rattus Rattus’s brand-new girlfriend Ratalie, who Rattus Rattus is hoping will be impressed by a romantic dinner of ‘cockroach in jus de rubbish bag’...
8.00 
#11 - Episode 1
Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired Apr 16, 2009
Rotten Romans: Funeral Fights and Gladiator School Frightful First World War: Lice Wars and Ready Steady Feast: Ersatz Food Putrid Pirates: The Black Spot and Pirate Rules Savage Stone Age: Stone Age Tool Set and Chief's Funeral Vicious Vikings: Historical Hairdressers and Warrior: Viking v Monk Gorgeous Georgians: Twisted Fairytales: The Three Little Pigs (Georgian window tax), Georgian Elections and Born 2 Rule
7.88 
#12 - Ridiculous Romantics
Season 7 - Episode 3 - Aired Jul 31, 2017
Horrible Histories charts the path towards true love. Henry VIII enlists the help of maitre d' Fred Sirieix as he tries to find the right wife on Historic First Dates. Elsewhere, we sample some medieval Munich love magic, see how Renaissance men tried to impress the ladies, listen to some of history's greatest love letters, and watch as King Alfonso of Spain's wedding takes a turn he's not expecting...
7.86 
#13 - Ingenious Inventors
Season 7 - Episode 6 - Aired Aug 21, 2017
Mankind's most ingenious inventors are given the Horrible Histories treatment, as we take in everything from the invention of the wheel to the crisp. Featuring the Gutenberg press, the man who invented both the dictionary (very successfully) and manned flight (less successfully). Also the Greeks and the Chinese battle as to which of them are history's best inventors.
7.83 
#14 - Episode 13
Season 1 - Episode 13 - Aired Jul 9, 2009
A lazy aristocrat invents the sandwich, the Romans host their own revolting cookery show and William Shakespeare is haunted by the ghost of King Richard III.
7.83 
#15 - Episode 3
Season 3 - Episode 3 - Aired Jun 1, 2011
A confused World War I soldier spends his first day in the trenches, William Wallace launches his music career as a rock rebel, Lady Jane Grey wins a frankly terrible competition, and the Welsh women of Fishguard defeat a French invasion without even trying.
7.80 
#16 - Episode 6
Season 1 - Episode 6 - Aired May 21, 2009
An evil Greek god appears on a daytime chat show, a rich Georgian swaps his wife with a peasant, and we meet some weird medieval monsters.
7.68 
#17 - Episode 7
Season 1 - Episode 7 - Aired May 28, 2009
There is a terrible smell in the Houses of Parliament, Cinderella struggles with the Blitz, and Helen of Troy reveals her complicated love life.
7.67 
#18 - Episode 3
Season 1 - Episode 3 - Aired Apr 30, 2009
Wicked Witches: Witchfinders Direct, Twisted Fairytales: The Frog Prince (witchcraft involving frogs) and The Middle Ages Witchcraft Show Vicious Vikings: Viking Beliefs , Eric and Asgot and Valhalla or Hel Potty Pioneers: Captain Scott and the South Pole Race Awful Egyptians: Making a Mummy (song), The History of Mummies and Shouty Man: All Purpose Ancient Egyptian Mummy Rotten Romans: Nero's Christian Candles and HHTV Sport: Lions v Christians Slimy Stuarts: HHTV News: Charles I's Execution and Historical Wife Swap: Puritans and Cavaliers
7.64 
#19 - Episode 4
Season 1 - Episode 4 - Aired May 7, 2009
The Tudors sing their family history, Bob explains the complete history of Rome in two minutes, and a mad Victorian gentleman eats King Louis XIV's mummified heart.
7.64 
#20 - Episode 5
Season 1 - Episode 5 - Aired May 14, 2009
A priest makes a piano from live pigs, Emperor Caligula declares war on the sea, and there are some disgusting beauty tips from Ancient Egypt.
7.56 
#21 - Monstrous Musicians
Season 7 - Episode 1 - Aired Jun 15, 2017
Horrible Histories reveals history's most monstrous musicians. From the earliest screeches of the Neanderthal, right through to Jimi Hendrix burning his guitar, Rattus Rattus guides us through the story of music making, even bumping into Simon Cowell at Beethoven's 'H Factor' audition.
7.56 
#22 - Episode 6
Season 3 - Episode 6 - Aired Jun 7, 2011
Henry VIII promotes his all meat, no vegetables diet plan, Bob Hale struggles desperately to explain the Middle Ages War of the Roses, a Stone Age man invents farming, and Admiral Nelson confuses everyone with his last words.
7.50 
#23 - Episode 2
Season 2 - Episode 2 - Aired Jun 1, 2010
A pirate captain regrets stealing a herd of seasick cows, a Georgian sportsman invents a whole new way of boxing, King Charles II raps about his party lifestyle, and the Georgian army goes to war against a bunch of naughty schoolboys.
7.47 
#24 - Episode 12
Season 1 - Episode 12 - Aired Jul 2, 2009
A Victorian teacher is confused by her pupils' bizarre names, the Romans run out of animals to execute, and Queen Victoria advertises her exercise DVD.
7.46 
#25 - Episode 12
Season 3 - Episode 12 - Aired Jul 19, 2011
The people of Strasbourg literally can't stand still with 'Dance Fever', HHTV presenter Fearne Polyester reports from a bizarre Greek festival, two Celtic warriors hold a rap battle to see who is best at boasting, and King Charles II meets the man who tried to steal the Crown Jewels.
7.45