The BEST Episodes of Horrible Histories (2009)
Every episode ever - ranked by fan votes!
Last Updated: Jan 11, 2020
Network: BBC One
Sketches, cartoons and quizzes liberally splattered with blood and gore, based on the books published by Scholastic.
#1 - Episode 1
Season 3 - Episode 1 - Aired May 30, 2011
Meet an annoying French prankster from the Middle Ages, witness bizarre Aztec food on Historical Masterchef, see what happens when Queen Elizabeth I needs the toilet, and learn how not to impress a woman in Victorian times -a painful lesson in manners. The truth about Dick Turpin in song; certainly no New Romantic.
9.93 
#2 - Episode 1
Season 4 - Episode 1 - Aired Apr 9, 2012
Dick Whittington pitches a movie about his life, Stone Age technology geeks queue for hours at the unveiling of the Bronze Age, and some German bomber pilots find an unfortunate use for a tourist guidebook to Britain.
9.13 
#3 - Episode 2
Season 4 - Episode 2 - Aired Apr 10, 2012
Henry VIII appears on a TV show hoping to raise money from his antique abbeys. Also, Charles Darwin sings about his theory of Natural Selection, and a pirate captain aims to be Lord Sugar's next Historical Apprentice.
9.08 
#4 - Episode 2
Season 3 - Episode 2 - Aired May 31, 2011
Some medieval knights discover the most disgusting way to attack a castle, the Saxons demonstrate the stupidest way to lose a battle, a Georgian goes shopping in a modern pet shop, and the kings and queens of England demonstrate how to remember them all, through the power of song.
9.02 
#5 - Heroic Heroes & Villainous Villains
Season 7 - Episode 5 - Aired Aug 14, 2017
Horrible Histories takes a look at the world's greatest heroes and villains. On the heroic side, we have everything from Douglas Bader's frequent escapes to the first men on the moon and Martin Luther King Jr, whereas our more villainous side contains Al Capone and Rameses the Great, and Steve Biceps brings us History's Deadly 60.
8.00 
#6 - Deadly Dynasties
Season 7 - Episode 12 - Aired May 7, 2018
Horrible Histories takes a look at some of the most famous families that have shaped the world, including the Romanovs of Russia, the Tudors of England, and Ramesses and his children in Ancient Egypt ... all 162 of them! The First Emperor of China Qin Shi Huang takes the mic, and Rattus invites his nephew, Scrappus, to help explore the Great Rattus dynasty, but as we discover families are never straight forward.
8.00 
#7 - Ridiculous Romance
Season 5 - Episode 14 - Aired Feb 14, 2014
We find out what happens when Henry VIII takes part in TV show Dating In Darkness and meets latest love Anne of Cleves, discover the problems encountered by Queen Elizabeth I’s portrait artist, and are treated to romantic musical interludes from The Love Rats Club, plus Queen Victoria as she duets with Prince Albert. We also say hello to Rattus Rattus’s brand-new girlfriend Ratalie, who Rattus Rattus is hoping will be impressed by a romantic dinner of ‘cockroach in jus de rubbish bag’...
8.00 
#8 - Episode 3
Season 3 - Episode 3 - Aired Jun 1, 2011
A confused World War I soldier spends his first day in the trenches, William Wallace launches his music career as a rock rebel, Lady Jane Grey wins a frankly terrible competition, and the Welsh women of Fishguard defeat a French invasion without even trying.
7.93 
#9 - Episode 1
Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired Apr 16, 2009
Rotten Romans: Funeral Fights and Gladiator School Frightful First World War: Lice Wars and Ready Steady Feast: Ersatz Food Putrid Pirates: The Black Spot and Pirate Rules Savage Stone Age: Stone Age Tool Set and Chief's Funeral Vicious Vikings: Historical Hairdressers and Warrior: Viking v Monk Gorgeous Georgians: Twisted Fairytales: The Three Little Pigs (Georgian window tax), Georgian Elections and Born 2 Rule
7.93 
#10 - Monstrous Musicians
Season 7 - Episode 1 - Aired Jun 15, 2017
Horrible Histories reveals history's most monstrous musicians. From the earliest screeches of the Neanderthal, right through to Jimi Hendrix burning his guitar, Rattus Rattus guides us through the story of music making, even bumping into Simon Cowell at Beethoven's 'H Factor' audition.
7.63 
#11 - Episode 11
Season 1 - Episode 11 - Aired Jun 25, 2009
Queen Victoria learns that her British comforts are not very British, a Viking warrior won't stop talking in rhyme, and on 'Axe Factor', the contestants try to become executioners.
7.44 
#12 - Episode 1
Season 2 - Episode 1 - Aired May 31, 2010
A prank-loving emperor hosts a dinner party on Roman Come Dine with Me, the Durham Home Guard injure themselves while learning first aid, and the Viking rock band paint the town red... literally.
7.43 
#13 - Episode 5
Season 2 - Episode 5 - Aired Jun 4, 2010
An Incan kid has the worst birthday ever, a Roman farmer meets a door-to-door poo salesman, and King George IV embarks on a solo musical career.
7.35 
#14 - Exceptional Explorers
Season 7 - Episode 2 - Aired Jul 24, 2017
Horrible Histories goes pear-shaped in an explorers special, meeting Christopher Columbus as he tries to teach a class that the world is indeed shaped like a pear. On the strict instructions of Emperor Nero, some hapless Roman centurions are quite literally stuck in the mud, searching for the source of the Nile. And intrepid Arctic explorer Peter Freuchen has to dig his way out of the snow with a frozen poo. From the Vikings' first small steps on American soil to humankind's first giant leaps on the moon, join Horrible Histories on this epic adventure.
7.33 
#15 - Episode 11
Season 5 - Episode 11 - Aired Jul 9, 2013
DI Bones investigates an unusual Victorian traffic accident, Roman scientist Pliny the Elder suffers a Stupid Death in ancient Pompeii, Prime Ministers Neville Chamberlain and Winston Churchill argue online over what to do about Adolf Hitler, and we discover the horrible history of early Australia.
7.32 
#16 - Episode 9
Season 4 - Episode 9 - Aired May 11, 2012
King Edward III gets married in a building site, Julius Caesar reveals his secret tips on hiding baldness, we learn the tricks of the criminal trade on the Real Victorian Hustle and we meet Renaissance Italy's most corrupt family: the Borgias.
7.28 
#17 - Episode 9
Season 5 - Episode 9 - Aired Jun 25, 2013
There is public confusion when King Charles II bans coffee shops, a seasick chicken ruins a Roman sea battle, mighty Egyptian Pharaoh, Ramesses II, meets some smelly peasants on Historical Wife Swap, and a cave-dwelling Stone Age couple try to buy their first house.
7.27 
#18 - Episode 3
Season 5 - Episode 3 - Aired May 29, 2013
The boys test their horsepower to the max on Stone Age Top Gear; Charles Dickens sings about his life and books; the Greek philosophers host weird dinner parties on Historical Come Dine With Me; and Vlad the Impaler reveals his horrible new plan for keeping out the neighbours.
7.26 
#19 - Episode 7
Season 2 - Episode 7 - Aired Jun 15, 2010
Joan of Arc gets a visit from a confused angel, a pirate captain tries to make his crew dress like ladies, and Mrs Celt enjoys being a Roman on Historical Wife Swap.
7.26 
#20 - Episode 11
Season 4 - Episode 11 - Aired May 25, 2012
Dr Culpeper invites us all to his highly unhealthy health spa, a Crusader knight competes on Historical Masterchef, King John worries about all the internet haters and crooner William Shakespeare serenades us with his big band.
7.24 
#21 - Episode 5
Season 3 - Episode 5 - Aired Jun 3, 2011
A Welsh prince from the Middle Ages has a very stupid death, King Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette go on Historical Wife Swap with some starving French peasants, a Tudor peasant gets a super-hot makeover from Historical Fashion Fix, and Queen Cleopatra sings about her femme fatale reputation.
7.23 
#22 - Episode 10
Season 5 - Episode 10 - Aired Jul 2, 2013
A Victorian businessman goes undercover in his own factory, there's a right royal squabble over who should rule medieval England, we meet eccentric Georgian politician Mad Jack Mytton and the Real Tudor Hustle reveals the cleverest con tricks by naughty historical criminals.
7.20 
#23 - Episode 7
Season 5 - Episode 7 - Aired Jun 11, 2013
Roman emperor Caesar Augustus reveals the lazy secret of his success, TV's most excitable reporter, Bob Hale, explains the very, very complex history of WW2, we meet Georgian England's most forgetful vicar, and Welsh hero Owain Glyndwr takes on the English in battle.
7.17 
#24 - Episode 12
Season 4 - Episode 12 - Aired Jun 1, 2012
A Victorian woman books a ticket on a very odd railway, a modern patient is (mis)treated by a Roman dentist, Alfred the Great pitches a movie about his life, and a Greek geek competes on Historical Mastermind.
7.14 
#25 - Episode 11
Season 3 - Episode 11 - Aired Jul 12, 2011
Some WWI soldiers try some very unusual ways to cure frostbite in the winter. Plus, the not at all romantic movie starring William the Conqueror, the story of Aztec Emperor Motecuhzoma, and a strange Stuart doctor takes a snooze during the middle of a battle.
7.11