The BEST Episodes of Call Me Fitz

Every episode ever - ranked by fan votes!

Last Updated: Sep 4, 2019

Network: HBO Canada

A morally bankrupt car salesman is forced to become business partners with his inner conscience, an off-beat do gooder intent on healing Fitz's mangled psyche, one hilarious disaster at a time.

It's All Fun and Games Until Someone Loses a Fitz

#1 - It's All Fun and Games Until Someone Loses a Fitz

Season 4 - Episode 5

It’s a rainy night at the Fitzpatrick house, and Larry takes the opportunity to use large amounts of alcohol to con the family into playing his favourite game: ‘Truth: the board game’. Truth is true to its name, and even Larry ends up discovering far more about the Fitzpatricks than he ever wanted to know… When they wake up the next morning to find a freshly dug grave in the backyard and a missing Elaine, the family must band together in order to re-discover those truths and figure out what happened the night before.

star 8.78
9 votes
Directors: Jason Priestley
Writers: Josh Saltzman

#2 - Semen-Gate

Season 3 - Episode 6

When the "Last Honest Man" approach is close to being sabotaged by Barry, Fitz's "supposed" illegitimate son, Fitz must try to save everything he can to stay in the race.

star 8.20
5 votes
Hell Hath No Drink Limit

#3 - Hell Hath No Drink Limit

Season 2 - Episode 12

When Fitz finds himself transported to the afterworld, he discovers that he and Larry really are two parts of the same soul. Only problem is that Fitz wants to party in hell while Larry's got loftier accoms in mind.

star 8.17
6 votes

#4 - O-Rigins

Season 4 - Episode 6

Wedding bells are ringing at casa Fitzpatrick as Ken and Elaine get set to re-tie the knot, and everyone is getting into the act. Everyone except for Fitz, who is convinced the wedding is a secret ploy to bring down Fitzpatrick motors once and for all. In order to stop the impending nuptials, Fitz teams up with unlikely ally and bedfellow, Paula Childs to help expose her father’s nefarious plans. More than kissing cousins are revealed when Pat Childs shows up at the ceremony no longer able to forever hold his peace.

star 8.12
8 votes
Directors: Scott Smith
Writers: Sheri Elwood, Nikolijne Troubetzkoy
Repo Wedding

#5 - Repo Wedding

Season 2 - Episode 9

This isn't the first time Fitz has been brought in for questioning it is, however, the first time he's been innocent of the charges. It's Fitz versus his nemesis Chester Vince. And vengenance is one of Fitz's favourite games...

star 8.00
6 votes
What the Fuck is a Beaver Moon?

#6 - What the Fuck is a Beaver Moon?

Season 2 - Episode 13

With the Beaver Moon upon him, Fitz puts together a team of unlikely experts for one last attempt to discover the identity of his shadowy nemesis. Too bad that team is the same sadsacks he sees everyday. Will they be able to save Fitz? And once and for all, will he uncover the identity of his shadowy assassin?

star 7.83
6 votes
Brotherly Love

#7 - Brotherly Love

Season 4 - Episode 8

After accepting Pat Childs’ offer to work at The O-Mobile dealership, Fitz quickly learns that life in the corporate world is not the cakewalk he hoped it would be. Thanks to Larry, Fitz discovers he could be in for a big pay out if he figures out a way to get canned. Yet, despite best efforts Pat refuses to give up on him leaving Fitz saddled with a major presentation to give that leaves him one step closer to embracing his inner Childs.

star 7.83
6 votes
Directors: Jason Priestley
Writers: Josh Saltzman
And Baby Makes... Fuck! (1)

#8 - And Baby Makes... Fuck! (1)

Season 3 - Episode 11

In order to repair the relationship between Fitz and Ken, Larry gets Fitz thrown in jail. Fitz realizes that there is one thing that he needs to survive, breakfast cereal.

star 7.80
5 votes
Married To The Mom

#9 - Married To The Mom

Season 1 - Episode 8

Fitz is pleasantly surprised to discover his marriage to Babs fulfills his latent maternal longings. After Fitz fully regresses to a child-like state, Babs discovers he doesn't want a lover, he wants a Mommy. Appalled, Larry tries to get Ali to help break them up. But when it becomes clear that Ali's jealous of Babs, Fitz realizes who he should really be with. He chases after Ali and they start going at it in her car. But an errant elbow throws the car in reverse. It rolls over Babs, killing her instantly...

star 7.63
16 votes
Directors: Shawn Thompson
Writers: Heidi Gerber
The Kidney Stays In The Picture

#10 - The Kidney Stays In The Picture

Season 1 - Episode 10

Reeling from the Ali debacle, Fitz has a new plan to get rid of Larry: if he's good for once, there'd be no need to have a conscience. Larry would finally leave him alone. So Fitz sets up a charity drive for Ned the cripple - not a kid, but a curmudgeonly dude in a wheelchair. And to prove he's really altruistic, he promises to give Ned a kidney. Larry is sure Fitz won't go through with it. Which of course, he doesn't - especially when he learns he's feeling down because he has syphilis. The match testing never happened - it was a scam by Ned, who ends up harvesting Larry's kidney for sale on the black market instead...

star 7.62
13 votes
Directors: Jason Priestley
Writers: Ari Posner
Heir of the Dog

#11 - Heir of the Dog

Season 2 - Episode 8

With their father hospitalized for testicular cancer, the Fitzpatrick children compete to prove their love and get the old man's cash.

star 7.60
5 votes
The Rise And Fall Of Ethnic Man

#12 - The Rise And Fall Of Ethnic Man

Season 3 - Episode 4

Fitz attempts to prove that he is a friend of "ethnics" as he finds out that Chester has the main lead in the demographic. Fitz will stop at nothing to be on top.

star 7.60
5 votes
Alice Doesn't Live, Anymore

#13 - Alice Doesn't Live, Anymore

Season 4 - Episode 1

Failing as a father, Fitz tries to unload his baby on someone. Unfortunately, it’s only after he realizes that his still unnamed child is a car sales cash cow that he manages to successfully ‘sell’ the child for drugs in front of a cop. To keep the baby, Fitz must unite the Fitzpatricks and prove to the courts that he can provide his child with a stable and loving home. Fitz discovers getting his family to act like a 'family' proves harder than even he imagined.

star 7.60
10 votes
Directors: Scott Smith
Writers: Sheri Elwood
The Diving Bell And The Barbara

#14 - The Diving Bell And The Barbara

Season 1 - Episode 7

Hoping to take advantage of spousal privilege, Fitz proposes to a comatose Babs, believing it will prevent her morse-code testimony. In an attempt to placate Larry, Fitz makes him his Best Man. He throws a lame, kid-themed bachelor party - the kind of party Fitz never had as a child. Ali attends in hopes of getting Fitz too drunk to go through with the wedding before Babs is moved to a private facility. But a chance jail-cell meeting with an S&M submissive/ordained minister leaves Fitz free and clear to marry Babs. Everything's coming up Fitz. Until Babs wakes up…

star 7.59
17 votes
Directors: Scott Smith
Writers: Adriana Maggs
Going Down Syndrome

#15 - Going Down Syndrome

Season 1 - Episode 6

Fitz tries to hook Larry up with a drunk chick, only to end up sleeping with Janet, the drunkest of them all. But the next morning Fitz discovers Janet wasn't drunk, she's brain damaged. Meghan meanwhile tries to get back on the dating horse. When she mistakes an attempted purse snatching for a come-on, she takes her mugger hostage at a motel. Larry thinks Fitz's latest predicament is a perfect opportunity to teach him about love and devotion. But it gets complicated when Ali shows up. Especially since her comatose mother has developed a communication technique with her finger twitches, and she has an actual case against Fitz...

star 7.58
19 votes
Directors: James Genn
Writers: Steven Cragg, Dennis Heaton
How Do You Say 'Blow Job' in Pennsylvania Dutch?

#16 - How Do You Say 'Blow Job' in Pennsylvania Dutch?

Season 2 - Episode 10

Broke, sans wheels, and on the lam…Fitz and Larry must track down Sonja in order to prove that Fitz didn’t kill her. But where is she? And is it true the Amish are cannibals?

star 7.57
7 votes
Raising What's-His-Name

#17 - Raising What's-His-Name

Season 4 - Episode 3

The Fitzpatrick family becomes interested in missing Baby Fitz when Josh stashed the profits from the baby brothel in his diaper. Fitz and Larry follow Baby Fitz’s trail to Chester Vince, who happens to be holding Ali Devon hostage in the back of his van. Fitz and Larry soon join Ali and the three must find a way to work together in order to keep a mentally unbalanced Chester from burning them alive in a quest to communicate with his alien overlord.

star 7.55
11 votes
Directors: James Allodi
Writers: Matt MacLennan
Long Con Silver

#18 - Long Con Silver

Season 1 - Episode 4

Fitz quickly unloads Elaine's car in hopes of putting their broken relationship behind him for good. But Larry is convinced it was a desperate plea to get her back in his life. Unfortunately for Fitz, that's exactly what happens. After manipulating Larry into a family reunion, Elaine gets Fitz on board to scam the Ruptals and get the car back. But its all part of a Long Con Elaine concocts to finalize her divorce and rid herself of all things Fitz once and for all...

star 7.50
20 votes
Directors: Scott Smith
Writers: Pat Bullard
The Upside of Matricide

#19 - The Upside of Matricide

Season 1 - Episode 9

Being a widower has its perks; the pity, the gifts, the inheritance - which Fitz uses to buy a plot of land for his dream bar, The Summer Wind Lounge. Ali learns her mother's dying wish was an organic burial. Unfortunately it's illegal. But if anyone can help her skirt the law, it's Fitz. Together, they steal the body from the crematorium, and bury her on Fitz's new real estate venture. Ali is grateful for a sense of closure on her strained maternal relationship. So she thanks Fitz by banging him in the car. But when she learns Fitz used all of Babs' money to invest in his bar, she's done with him forever...

star 7.50
10 votes
Directors: Shawn Thompson
Writers: Dennis Heaton
Revel Without Applause

#20 - Revel Without Applause

Season 2 - Episode 11

With death on the Beaver Moon quickly approaching, Fitz realizes his accomplishments don't add up to shit and sets out on a highly dangerous attempt to go out in a blaze of glory - a high school speed record that no one believes he will survive

star 7.50
4 votes
Fuck The Vote

#21 - Fuck The Vote

Season 3 - Episode 5

"Sex For Votes" tactics that Fitz uses backfires when the Ladies Auxiliary president is found dead. Larry's approach proves counter-productive than anything.

star 7.50
6 votes
The Totally Legitimate Death Of Meghan Fitzpatrick

#22 - The Totally Legitimate Death Of Meghan Fitzpatrick

Season 3 - Episode 7

Fitz starts to bounce back as he starts to gain popularity. He plans to go after the hearts of everyone by claiming the "sympathy" vote for himself.

star 7.50
6 votes
And Baby Makes... Fuck! (2)

#23 - And Baby Makes... Fuck! (2)

Season 3 - Episode 12

Ali goes into labor and Fitz attempts to get the dealership back before the little guy is born. He doesn't want his son to think he is a loser.

star 7.50
6 votes
Baby's First Brothel

#24 - Baby's First Brothel

Season 4 - Episode 2

When Fitz's attempts to transform Fitzpatrick Motors into a family-friendly establishment fail, he realizes he is dealing with a customer he knows nothing about – mothers. Fitz ends up getting to know one of his customers a whole lot better and realizes he’s face-to-face with the perfect business opportunity. Things go awry when Larry brings the social worker by for a surprise home inspection.

star 7.50
8 votes
Directors: Scott Smith
Writers: Derek Schreyer

#25 - Loco

Season 1 - Episode 2

After a failed hit on Larry's life, Fitz's only option is to get rid of him by proving Larry's a crazy person. After all, he claims to be his conscience. Meanwhile, Larry tries to purge Fitz of drugs and alcohol. But by the time Larry rallies the Fitzpatrick family for an intervention, Fitz's own sanity begins to dwindle in the throes of the DTs, and he decides to take whacking matters into his own hands...

star 7.48
31 votes
Directors: Scott Smith
Writers: Sheri Elwood, Dennis Heaton