The BEST episodes of Suburgatory

Every episode of Suburgatory ever, ranked from best to worst by thousands of votes from fans of the show. The best episodes of Suburgatory!

Single father George only wants the best for his 16-year-old daughter, Tessa. So when he finds a box of condoms on her nightstand, he moves them out of their apartment in New York City to a house in the suburbs. But all Tessa sees is the horror of over-manicured lawns and plastic Franken-moms. Being in the 'burbs can be hell, but it also may just bring Tessa and George closer than they've ever been.

Last Updated: 12/26/2023Network: ABC (US)Status: Ended
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Catch and Release
star
7.80
512 votes

#1 - Catch and Release

Season 3 - Episode 8 - Aired 3/26/2014

Tessa asks for advice when Lisa decides to propose to Malik; George believes that Nora may be rude to her employees.

Watch Now:Amazon
Apocalypse Meow
star
7.79
588 votes

#2 - Apocalypse Meow

Season 2 - Episode 21 - Aired 4/17/2013

Dallas helps George tell Tessa that he has sold their house; when Dalia tries to make Tessa miserable, Tessa seeks revenge.

Directors: Ken Whittingham
Watch Now:Amazon
Stiiiiiiill Horny
star
7.75
526 votes

#3 - Stiiiiiiill Horny

Season 3 - Episode 13 - Aired 5/14/2014

When Tessa joins a knitting circle, the age of her new friends surprises George; George writes a song dedicated to his muse; Malik and Lisa bicker.

Writer: Andrew Guest
Watch Now:Amazon
Go, Gamblers!
star
7.73
578 votes

#4 - Go, Gamblers!

Season 2 - Episode 20 - Aired 4/10/2013

Tessa helps Ryan choose a college; George asks Dallas to move in with him; Sheila sells George's house.

Directors: Alex Hardcastle
Writer: Matt Ward
Watch Now:Amazon
I'm Just Not That Into Me
star
7.64
589 votes

#5 - I'm Just Not That Into Me

Season 3 - Episode 7 - Aired 3/12/2014

Tessa becomes enamored with the male version of herself she meets at a college party; a matchmaker inspires Dallas to transform her look.

Directors: Claire Scanlon
Writer: Andrew Guest
Watch Now:Amazon
Foam Finger
star
7.60
764 votes

#6 - Foam Finger

Season 2 - Episode 4 - Aired 11/7/2012

When Dalia abandons her friends Kimantha, Kenzie and Kaitlyn to hang out with her father's fiancee, her former pals turn to Lisa and Tessa; George and Dallas take their relationship to the next level.

Directors: Alex Hardcastle
Watch Now:Amazon
Leaving Chatswin
star
7.58
579 votes

#7 - Leaving Chatswin

Season 2 - Episode 15 - Aired 2/27/2013

George is deeply affected when Marty passes away; after learning that Ryan has been dishonest, Tessa considers the future of their relationship and her plans for college.

Directors: Elliot Hegarty
Writer: Drew Hancock
Watch Now:Amazon
Chinese Chicken
star
7.58
608 votes

#8 - Chinese Chicken

Season 2 - Episode 10 - Aired 1/23/2013

George starts to feel stifled when Dallas' efforts to promote his business go overboard; Tessa learns what life is like as a football player's girlfriend.

Directors: Alex Hardcastle
Writer: Andrew Guest
Watch Now:Amazon
Ryan's Song
star
7.58
770 votes

#9 - Ryan's Song

Season 2 - Episode 3 - Aired 10/31/2012

Feeling guilty about keeping the truth from Ryan, Lisa agrees to help him with Tessa; Dallas invites her life coach along on her first date with George; Tessa baby-sits with Opus.

Directors: Alex Hardcastle
Writer: Andrew Guest
Watch Now:Amazon
Pilot
star
7.57
1956 votes

#10 - Pilot

Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired 9/28/2011

Tessa and her father experience culture shock when they move out of New York and into a house in the suburbs.

Directors: Michael Fresco
Writer: Emily Kapnek
Watch Now:Amazon
Halloween
star
7.57
1470 votes

#11 - Halloween

Season 1 - Episode 5 - Aired 10/26/2011

Tessa channels her inner "suburban girl" for a Halloween costume, but it ends up spooking her friends and everyone at school since she reminds them of a recently "departed" resident of Chatswin. And George is determined to prove to Halloween-hater Dallas that being scared can be fun, but gets a scare of his own when Steven Royce (guest star Jay Mohr), Dallas' husband, finally comes home from one of his many business trips.

Directors: Adam Davidson
Writer: Andrew Guest
Watch Now:Amazon
The Casino Trip
star
7.57
1185 votes

#12 - The Casino Trip

Season 1 - Episode 12 - Aired 1/18/2012

When George wins an all expenses paid trip to Atlantic City, he enlists Noah, Fred, Tom and Alex, and it turns into a getaway with the guys. During their trip they run into Steven Royce (who is supposed to be in Singapore), and they help Fred cope with his gambling problem. Meanwhile Tessa tries to get some alone time with Scott Strauss.

Directors: Ken Whittingham
Writer: Andrew Guest
Watch Now:Amazon
Sex and the Suburbs
star
7.56
1104 votes

#13 - Sex and the Suburbs

Season 1 - Episode 13 - Aired 2/8/2012

Tessa enjoys rubbing it in Dalia's face that Scott Strause chose her over Dalia. However the closer Tessa gets to Scott, the more nervous George becomes. When George discovers a box of XXL condoms that Lisa has given Tessa, he becomes obsessed and starts planning game night with her friends in hopes of keeping her at home more. Meanwhile Tessa soon discovers that the more time she spends with Scott, the less attracted to him she is.

Writer: Adam Barr
Watch Now:Amazon
The Birds and the Biederman
star
7.55
637 votes

#14 - The Birds and the Biederman

Season 3 - Episode 4 - Aired 2/5/2014

Tess and Dahlia negotiate George's and Dallas' territories in Chatswin; Tessa notices Lisa spending time with Ryan's girlfriend; Fred thinks Sheila is distancing herself.

Directors: Claire Scanlon
Watch Now:Amazon
Down Time
star
7.55
916 votes

#15 - Down Time

Season 1 - Episode 18 - Aired 4/11/2012

When Dallas's divorce is finalized, George becomes concerned and includes her in a shopping trip with Noah to buy a new mattress. Meanwhile Dalia makes a breakthrough in therapy with her psychiatrist, Dr. Richard Rohl (James Lipton), Lisa and Malik try to set up Tessa, and Ryan takes Tessa on a date.

Directors: Alex Hardcastle
Watch Now:Amazon
Les Lucioles
star
7.55
515 votes

#16 - Les Lucioles

Season 3 - Episode 12 - Aired 5/7/2014

Tessa struggles with the budget while planning Lisa and Malik's wedding; June warns Tessa to stay away from Ryan; Malik turns to George when his family decides to boycott the wedding; Sheila gives Lisa advice.

Directors: Alex Hardcastle
Writer: Emily Kapnek
Watch Now:Amazon
No Me Gusta, Mami
star
7.55
626 votes

#17 - No Me Gusta, Mami

Season 3 - Episode 1 - Aired 1/15/2014

George hopes to rebuild his relationship with Tessa; upset about George and Dallas' breakup, Dalia shuns her mother.

Directors: Ken Whittingham
Writer: Emily Kapnek
Watch Now:Amazon
Homecoming
star
7.55
782 votes

#18 - Homecoming

Season 2 - Episode 1 - Aired 10/17/2012

Tessa returns to Chatswin after spending summer with her grandmother; George finds Tessa's renewed interest in her mother threatening; Tessa signs up for the Fall Follies; Noah and Dallas compete for Carmen.

Directors: Ken Whittingham
Writer: Emily Kapnek
Watch Now:Amazon
Black Thai
star
7.53
566 votes

#19 - Black Thai

Season 2 - Episode 8 - Aired 1/9/2013

When Dalia receives a new car after PSAT results are released, Tessa becomes obsessed with finding out Dalia's score; Jill and Noah ask Mr. Wolfe to tutor their baby.

Directors: Alex Hardcastle
Watch Now:Amazon
Junior Secretary's Day
star
7.52
655 votes

#20 - Junior Secretary's Day

Season 2 - Episode 9 - Aired 1/16/2013

George has to manage Tessa's recovery after her wisdom teeth are removed and deal with Fred Shay, who has moved into their basement after a career setback; Dallas is insecure about her relationship with George.

Directors: Elliot Hegarty
Writer: Matt Ward
Watch Now:Amazon
The Barbecue
star
7.52
1527 votes

#21 - The Barbecue

Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired 10/5/2011

Surprised Tessa realizes she is attracted to her jock suburban neighbor; George feels pressured to throw the perfect barbecue.

Directors: Michael Fresco
Writer: Bob Kushell
Watch Now:Amazon
Entering Eden
star
7.52
893 votes

#22 - Entering Eden

Season 1 - Episode 19 - Aired 4/18/2012

George begins dating Eden (Alicia Silverstone), a woman he met at the town's farmer's market. Tessa helps Dalia find her missing dog.

Directors: Gail Mancuso
Watch Now:Amazon
The Witch of East Chatswin
star
7.51
753 votes

#23 - The Witch of East Chatswin

Season 2 - Episode 2 - Aired 10/24/2012

When Tessa convinces Dalia and her friends to think up feminist-inspired Halloween costumes, she attracts the attention of the Chatswin witch; Noah and George dress as each other; George misunderstands when Dallas asks him out.

Directors: Victor Nelli Jr.
Watch Now:Amazon
The Great Compromise
star
7.50
907 votes

#24 - The Great Compromise

Season 1 - Episode 21 - Aired 5/9/2012

While Tessa tries to adjust to living with Eden, George takes issue with Eden's parenting; Lisa and Malik consider which camp they should attend.

Directors: Randy Zisk
Watch Now:Amazon
Out in the Burbs
star
7.50
1100 votes

#25 - Out in the Burbs

Season 1 - Episode 11 - Aired 1/11/2012

When Tessa is asked to show new guy Josh Sherman around school, she becomes convinced that he's gay, when in fact he's an undercover narcotics officer. Lisa becomes deeply infatuated with Josh, and Tessa inadvertly convinces Mr. Wolfe to make special announcement to the student body. Meanwhile George re-evaluates his relationship with Dallas.

Directors: Elliot Hegarty
Writer: Bob Kushell
Watch Now:Amazon