The BEST episodes of Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide
Every episode of Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide ever, ranked from best to worst by thousands of votes from fans of the show. The best episodes of Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide!
The whacky adventures of Ned Bigby and his best pals Moze and Cookie at James K. Polk Middle School, as "every-kid" Ned shatters the fourth wall to share tips and tricks on navigating middle school or junior high hurdles. Ned's not super cool, and he has no superpowers. He is, however, witty, well-groomed, upbeat and self-aware. Moreover, with more than a little help from his two best friends, he's equipped to conquer middle school minefields. From crushing bullies to crushes, from off- the-wall, mean and cool teachers to pop quizzes, elections and detentions, Ned knows that nothing, including the seventh grade, is as bad as it seems, and friendship matters most.
#1 - Guide to: Health & Jealousy
Season 3 - Episode 19 - Aired 5/12/2007
Health: Ned suffers from an embarrassing itch; Moze tries to clean up the resuscitation dummy, but she throws it out the window and buries it, and Cookie thinks that it was Faymen; Cookie also is suffering from mood swings. Jealousy: Ned and Moze pretend to date to free Ned from Missy's jealous rage; Seth, Faymen and Loomer fight over Moze; Cookie attempts to make Lisa Zemo jealous by pretending to go out with another girl, but instead, it makes Evelyn Kwong jealous.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#2 - Guide to: Money & Parties
Season 3 - Episode 17 - Aired 4/7/2007
Money: The trio need to raise money for a music festival; Ned borrows money from Missy that he must work off to pay her back; Moze gets her money from hard work; Cookie tries to get money from entertainment. Parties: Ned goes to Seth's party with Missy and tries to ditch her when Suzie unexpectedly shows up; Moze tries to kiss Ned to determine if she'll see sparks; Cookie is not invited, so he sneaks in as the girl named Simone.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#3 - Guide to: Getting Organized & Extra Credit
Season 3 - Episode 14 - Aired 2/24/2007
Getting Organized: Ned's locker is a mess, and his brain is too! With the help of Mr. Sweeney, he needs to get organized. Moze and Cookie's favorite snack has been replaced by Powdered Mini Donuts in the vending machine, and they need to work together to get their favorite snack back. Extra Credit: Ned needs to get at least a B- or his mom will get really mad at him. Unfortunately, his average is a C+ in all classes. When asking his teachers how to bump his grade up, they all say the same thing: Extra Credit. Now he needs to complete four Extra Credit Assignments in just a few days. Meanwhile,Moze wants her mark bumped up to an A+, so she designs a very large Volcano and Cookie gets a Credit card that is to be used for emergencies, but he uses it for general purposes.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#5 - Guide to: Popularity & Stress
Season 3 - Episode 3 - Aired 10/15/2006
Popularity: Someone has made a list of the most popular kids at school. Ned tries to talk to Susie, even though he is not in the top ten. Cookie hunts down the list's maker to convince him to make Cookie popular. Lastly, Moze finds out she's one of Polk's top ten most popular kids, but still wants to hang out with her old friends. Stress: Ned is stressed because he thinks Suzie has a new boyfriend and wants to break up with him. Cookie is stressed because his arch rival, Evelyn beat him on a test, and Moze is stressed about becoming her English teacher when she grows up.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#6 - Guide to: Fundraising & Competition
Season 3 - Episode 15 - Aired 3/10/2007
Fundraising: Ned and Cookie must raise money in different ways after they eat all of the chocolate they were supposed to sell for school fundraising; Moze cannot seem to sell her last chocolate bar. Competition: Ned teams up with Missy to battle Loomer in a Social Studies competition; Moze must find a new rival now that Suzie has moved away; Cookie fakes his way to become Lisa's salsa dance partner for a dance competition.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#7 - Guide to: Dismissal & The School Play
Season 3 - Episode 4 - Aired 10/22/2006
Dismissal: Ned, Moze and Cookie must make it to the bus on time; Suzie moves into Ned's locker, which messes with his dismissal routine; Moze and all the other girls are forced to wait to use the bathroom; Cookie accidentally kisses Evelyn Kwong and must avoid her. School Plays: The school puts on a production of Romeo and Juliet; Ned is determined to stop Spencer, who is playing Romeo, from kissing Suzie, who is playing Juliet; Moze, the stage manager, is determined to stop Ned and keep the play on track; Cookie helps Ned so that he can get the role of Romeo.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#8 - Guide to: The Library & Volunteering
Season 3 - Episode 10 - Aired 1/27/2007
Volunteering: Ned volunteers at a nursing home and shows an old lady around Polk; Moze volunteers to clean up the school back entrance with the help of Loomer, Crony and Buzz; Cookie competes with Evelyn Kwong in the school store. The Library: Ned and Cookie must solve the mystery of their missing library books; Moze "befriends" a girl in order to get a book she needs for a book report.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#9 - Guide to: Boys & Girls
Season 3 - Episode 12 - Aired 2/10/2007
Boys: Ned goes through a phase when Suzie moves away. The guys try and get him back to normal, so he can continue his guide. Meanwhile, Moze starts a class to help girls with understanding guys. Girls: Ned has a hard time writing more tips when he realizes he has no tips about girls. So he asks Moze to take over for some tips. Cookie dresses up as a girl to find out what Liza Zemo likes in a guy.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#10 - Guide to: Your Body & Procrastination
Season 2 - Episode 6 - Aired 11/12/2005
Your Body: Moze freaks when she feels she is too tall. After crushing somebody's project, she really wants to become short. Ned tries to become strong after Coach agreed to Loomer that they'd have a weight lifting competition. Cookie tries to become overprotective so Loomer won't hurt him. Procrastination: Moze bets Ned that he won't finish his project on time and the loser has to stand in front of the school as a clown. Cookie creates a machine that will stop his procrastination problems. Moze also needs to learn to clog dance.
#11 - Guide to: Making New Friends & Positives and Negatives
Season 3 - Episode 16 - Aired 3/24/2007
Making New Friends: Ned tries to be friends with Faymen, Moze wants a friend to go shopping with and Cookie befriends the Weasel. Positives and Negatives: Ned tries to cheer up the most negative kid in school, Moze finds out Faymen's kisses lack spark and Cookie tries to zap Loomer with static electricity
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#12 - Guide to: Bathrooms & Project Partners
Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired 9/19/2004
Bathrooms: Cookie tries to hold using the bathroom but gets stuck in the girls' room. Moze puts Ned's name on a bathroom stall, and someone puts kissy lips next to it. Project Partners: Moze must choose a partner for Social Studies. Ned and Cookie's baby is kidnapped.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#13 - Guide to: Tests & When You Like Someone Who Is Going Out with Someone Else
Season 3 - Episode 20 - Aired 6/2/2007
Tests: Ned studies for three tests on the same day with the help of the school's geeks and becomes a geek himself in the process; Moze takes a test to see if Ned or Faymen is right for her and Faymen gets all perfect scores and Ned as a geek gets all zeroes; Cookie gives Evelyn Kwong a "test" to prove that they are incompatible and she decides to date Seth instead. When You Like Someone Who Is Going Out with Someone Else: Ned tries to confess to Moze that he likes her; Moze must decide between Ned and Faymen, while Faymen has a decide whether or not to go back to Brazil; Cookie eliminates all of Lisa Zemo's other admirers so that he can spend time with her; in a surprise ending reveal, Suzie has moved back to Polk.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#14 - Guide to: First Day & Lockers
Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired 9/12/2004
First Day: It's the first day of school, and Ned and Cookie discover Moze has taken Cooking instead of Art to separate herself from the guys for once. Lockers: When Ned's new locker neighbor gives him a bad rep, he searches for a new locker. Moze tries to use her locker to make new friends that are girls, but ends up competing with Suzie Crabgrass.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#15 - Guide to: Emergency Drills & Late Bus
Season 1 - Episode 13 - Aired 2/19/2005
Emergency Drills:Every time Ned wants to ask Suzie to Chandra Taylor's party an emergency drill distracts him. Eventually, Ned gets to ask Suzie and she accepts. The only problem is Ned can't go to the party because he, Cookie, and Moze are trapped in Gordy's extra supply locker. Late Bus: When bus number 9 breaks down, all the kids are stuck waiting for another bus. Loomer makes a deal with Ned that he won't bully him for an entire year if Ned helps him get Moze's attention. Meanwhile, Cookie is leading a "Cookie's Late Bus After School Tour" in which he shows kids what teachers do after hours. We see Coach Dirga crying over a soap opera, and the worst possible thing ever, a teacher rap group taught by Lil' Romeo. Also, Moze makes friends with another Jennifer, but finds out it's her last day. And what we have seen, this may lead to a friendship between Moze and Suzie Crabgrass.
#16 - Guide to: Asking Someone Out & Recycling
Season 2 - Episode 12 - Aired 3/4/2006
Asking Someone Out: Ned tries to find out if Suzie will go on a date with him; Moze attempts to ask Seth out; Cookie helps Dr. Xavier ask Gordy out. Recycling: Ned, Cookie, and Moze compete to win a mountain bike in a recycling contest. Everything they collect is stolen, but Cookies idea of glueing bottles together ends up in him having it bought by an art collecter. Ned loses the guide in the recycling madness, and Moze sneaks into the teacher's lounge to collect recycling.
#17 - Guide to: The Bus & Bad Hair Days
Season 3 - Episode 8 - Aired 11/26/2006
The Bus: Ned needs to get to school as quickly as possible to get a love note he left for Suzie that could ruin their relationship. Moze tries to get the new kid to sit with her, but Martin is making it difficult for her. Meanwhile, Cookie misses the bus and needs to find a way to get to school or his perfect no tardy record will be no more. Bad Hair Days: Ned needs to sneak over to the high school to get a free haircut so he will have enough money to take Suzie out on a date. Moze tries many different hair styles to try and get the new kid to like her. Finally, Cookie attempts to get Lisa to notice his very, very tiny mustache.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#18 - Guide to: Reading & Principals
Season 3 - Episode 2 - Aired 10/1/2006
Reading: Ned tries ways to avoid his reading assignments, and Moze starts a girls-only book club that Cookie desperately wants to be in it. Principals: Principal Pal is retiring. It’s up to Ned, Moze and Cookie to find a new replacement, or VP Crubbs will get the job.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#19 - Guide to: Double Dating & The Last Day
Season 2 - Episode 20 - Aired 6/3/2006
Double Dating: For the final dance of the school year, Ned and Suzie double date with Moze and hunk Jock Bitterman. Cookie meanwhile is asked by Lisa and says yes. Soon after Vanessa says yes, so Cookie must take Lisa and Vanessa to the dance and keep them separated. The Last Day: Ned and Moze try to figure the best way to tell Suzie about “the kiss”. Determined to catch the weasel before the summer, Gordy lets Cookies Battle Bot free in the halls, where it unleashes havoc.
Watch Now:Amazon#20 - Guide to: Field Trips, Permission Slips, Signs & Weasels (1)
Season 3 - Episode 21 - Aired 6/8/2007
The school goes on a field trip to a museum, including Ned, Moze and Cookie, even after they have been banned from the field trip by Vice-Principal Crubbs for trying to forge a permission slip for Cookie. Ned tries to spend time with Suzie while avoiding Crubbs; Moze tries to see the wild boy, and Loomer tries to spend time with her. Cookie becomes "the Steel Eagle" to impress Lisa Zemo. Eventually, all three are chased by Crubbs, museum security guards, and samurai actors. Ned then becomes the museum's titular Wild Boy and must choose between Suzie and Moze. He chooses Moze, they kiss, and become boyfriend and girlfriend, while Suzie decides to date Loomer again. Cookie learns of a plan to steal the museum's Wild Boy painting, so the trio gain the attention of the security guards and catch the thieves. Cookie wins a date with Lisa. Meanwhile, back at the school, Gordy tries to catch the weasel with the help of the other teachers, whose items have been destroyed by the weasel. They eventually demolish the entire school to catch the weasel, only to find out that it has given birth; feeling sympathetic, Gordy and the teachers decide to spare the weasel.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#21 - Guide to: Crushes & Dances
Season 1 - Episode 5 - Aired 10/10/2004
Crushes: Ned has a crush on Suzie and Cookie has developed a "perfect match" computer program. Coconut Head follows Moze and she thinks that Coconut head wants to ask her to the dance. Dances: Ned wants to dance with Suzie. But with her getting together and breaking up, will he be able to dance with her? Moze has dance tips of her own while Cookie waits for supermodel Martika after forcing to get her to be his perfect match.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#22 - Guide to: Vice Principals & Mondays
Season 2 - Episode 5 - Aired 11/5/2005
Vice Principals: Vandalism happens in the wood shop class. So the vice principal comes and finds a 'Cheedle' at the scene. He keeps gathering suspects as more vandalism occurs. Mondays: Every Monday morning, people are grumpy, tired and depressed. Ned and Moze are determined to find a way to beat the Monday Blues, but they end up letting a monkey wreak havoc in the school for weeks.
#23 - Guide to: Hallways & Friends Moving
Season 3 - Episode 11 - Aired 2/3/2007
Hallway: Ned becomes the hall monitor and lets people in violation get off the hook, which leads the students believing that they can get away with anything in the halls; Moze tries to use hallway time to talk to Faymen; Cookie becomes the hallway traffic reporter. Friends Moving: Ned becomes concerned for his safety after the events of the previous episode, so he starts carrying around a pillow, or a "cushion protector" as he calls it; Moze tries to stop Faymen from leaving; Cookie tells Evelyn Kwong he is leaving for Hawaii, so everyone becomes convinced he is leaving; Suzie moves away, much to Ned's surprise and disappointment.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#24 - Guide to: April Fools Day & Excuses
Season 2 - Episode 13 - Aired 3/25/2006
April Fools Day: Vice Principal Crubbs pranks everyone on April Fools Day, so Ned, Cookie and Gordy devise a plan to prank him back; Moze attempts to break up with Seth, but he thinks it is an April Fools joke; the new superintendent also comes to visit. Excuses: A dog eats Ned's homework, but Sweeney doesn't believe him until the dog eats Sweeney's work, so the two team up to catch the dog; when Moze blows off a date with Seth, she makes up an excuse that her grandmother is in the hospital, but Seth wants to meet Moze's grandmother; Vanessa tells the same excuse to Cookie, but he does not believe it until he sends Vanessa's grandmother falling down the stairs.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV#25 - Guide to: Sick Days & Spelling Bee
Season 1 - Episode 6 - Aired 10/17/2004
Sick Days: Ned must stay healthy when the flu hits Polk Middle School and he finds out Matt Hoffman is coming to visit. Cookie tries to keep his perfect attendance record in tact with help from Lisa. Moze tries to get sick and miss her speech in Social Studies. Not succeding, Moze must make her speech but finds out it is easier than she thought. Spelling Bee: Cookie is the only one with a chance to beat the dreaded Killer Bees. With an easy spell at the spelling bee, will it be Ned who beats the Killer Bees? Moze copes with sitting by Mr. Gross after spelling a word wrong.
Watch Now:AmazonApple TV