The BEST Episodes of Inside No. 9

Every episode ever - ranked by fan votes!

Last Updated: Oct 24, 2020

Network: BBC Two

Inside No. 9 invites viewers into six very different No. 9s, where the ordinary and mundane rub shoulders with the extraordinary and macabre. From a grand country house where a game of 'sardines' leads to some chilling revelations in a wardrobe; to a very oddly haunted house; to a blood-soaked actor's dressing room in London's West End; to the flat of an apparently happy primary school teacher who becomes the victim of a good deed; these unpredictable tales feature high comedy and claustrophobic horror by turns.

The 12 Days of Christine

#1 - The 12 Days of Christine

Season 2 - Episode 2 - Aired Apr 2, 2015

Christine Clarke brings a new man back to her flat from a New Year's Eve party, and immediately her life starts to unravel. Who is the terrifying stranger that keeps appearing in the flat at night?

star 8.17
469 votes
Directors: Guillem Morales
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
A Quiet Night In

#2 - A Quiet Night In

Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired Feb 12, 2014

Gerald owns a beautiful house with lots of beautiful things in it. Beautiful things that are also extremely valuable. The kind of things that might just become the target of an audacious criminal enterprise.

star 8.10
621 votes
Directors: David Kerr
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Once Removed

#3 - Once Removed

Season 4 - Episode 3 - Aired Jan 16, 2018

According to the Holmes & Rahe Stress Scale, the three most troubling experiences in life are the death of a spouse, divorce and imprisonment. Moving house is only 32nd on the list. But anything could happen in the last 10 minutes of this episode. Or the 10 minutes before that. Or the first 10 minutes for that matter.

star 8.08
300 votes
Directors: Jim O'Hanlon
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Empty Orchestra

#4 - Empty Orchestra

Season 3 - Episode 3 - Aired Mar 7, 2017

At a karaoke party to celebrate a colleague's promotion, a group of office workers decide to express their feelings through their choice of songs.

star 8.07
417 votes
Directors: Guillem Morales
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Misdirection

#5 - Misdirection

Season 5 - Episode 4 - Aired Feb 24, 2020

World-famous magician Neville Griffin is extremely protective of his secrets, but student journalist Gabriel is determined to get an interview nonetheless. Griffin actually believes that stealing a magic trick is probably worse than murder. How would he know that, exactly?

star 8.06
125 votes
Tempting Fate

#6 - Tempting Fate

Season 4 - Episode 6 - Aired Feb 6, 2018

A dead hoarder's flat, a blood-stained floor, a dead rat, and a terrible, inescapable curse from beyond the grave. All in an ordinary day's work for council contractors Keith, Nick and Maz.

star 8.00
286 votes
Directors: Jim O'Hanlon
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
The Riddle of the Sphinx

#7 - The Riddle of the Sphinx

Season 3 - Episode 2 - Aired Feb 28, 2017

A professor at the University of Cambridge attempts to teach a student how to solve a cryptic crossword.

star 7.91
421 votes
Directors: Guillem Morales
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Tom & Gerri

#8 - Tom & Gerri

Season 1 - Episode 3 - Aired Feb 19, 2014

Tom is a primary school teacher with ambitious ideas of becoming an author. When he tries to repay a good turn from a late-night caller, he gradually becomes the victim of his own generosity. As time passes, his new friend - Migg - becomes an increasingly dominant part of Tom's life, threatening his relationship with his aspiring actress girlfriend, Gerri.

star 7.86
524 votes
Directors: David Kerr
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Cold Comfort

#9 - Cold Comfort

Season 2 - Episode 4 - Aired Apr 16, 2015

It's Andy's first day as a volunteer at the Comfort Support Line call centre, which offers the lonely and desperate a chance to talk about their problems. All the CSL counsellors have their own ways of dealing with clients, coping with the emotional stress and killing time between phone calls. But is Andy really prepared for what's to come?

star 7.83
399 votes
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Zanzibar

#10 - Zanzibar

Season 4 - Episode 1 - Aired Jan 2, 2018

Welcome to London's Hotel Zanzibar. Our varied guests have travelled from afar. Proposals, plots and prostitutes combine. It's a comedy of errors on floor nine.

star 7.80
327 votes
Directors: David Kerr
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
La Couchette

#11 - La Couchette

Season 2 - Episode 1 - Aired Mar 26, 2015

On board the sleeper from Paris to Bourg St. Maurice, a motley collection of passengers try to get a quiet night's sleep as the train makes its way across France. But as the sleeping compartment fills up, the chances of that begin to look highly unlikely. In Deuxième Classe, everyone can hear you scream...

star 7.79
418 votes
Directors: Guillem Morales
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Bernie Clifton's Dressing Room

#12 - Bernie Clifton's Dressing Room

Season 4 - Episode 2 - Aired Jan 9, 2018

It's been 30 years since Northern double-act Len and Tommy last appeared on stage together, that fateful night at the Glasgow Pavilion. Then Tommy walked out on Len, and that was curtains for Cheese & Crackers. Until now - and one last gig in front of an invited audience.

star 7.78
316 votes
Directors: Graeme Harper
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
To Have and To Hold

#13 - To Have and To Hold

Season 4 - Episode 4 - Aired Jan 23, 2018

When Adrian's career as a wedding photographer starts to get in the way of his own marriage, his wife Harriet is determined to find out why.

star 7.76
284 votes
Directors: David Kerr
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Nana's Party

#14 - Nana's Party

Season 2 - Episode 5 - Aired Apr 23, 2015

It is Nana's special day: it isn't every day you get to be 79. She is excited about spending the afternoon with her whole family - even Pat and Jim, who both love a great practical joke. Her Angela has put on a lovely spread, including a huge cake. But as Nana says, 'Don't worry about the future: you can't predict it'.

star 7.71
359 votes
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Private View

#15 - Private View

Season 3 - Episode 5 - Aired Mar 21, 2017

A group of strangers are invited to attend a private exhibition at an art gallery, but none of them knows why they were invited.

star 7.64
377 votes
Directors: Guillem Morales
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Sardines

#16 - Sardines

Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired Feb 5, 2014

It is the day of Rebecca and Jeremy's engagement party, and everyone (well, nearly everyone) has turned up to the old house to wish them well. Except that one of the bedrooms, the one with all the old baggage in it, has been left unlocked...

star 7.61
776 votes
Directors: David Kerr
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
The Bill

#17 - The Bill

Season 3 - Episode 1 - Aired Feb 21, 2017

A group of friends go for a night out at a local restaurant. Soon an argument erupts about who is going to pay the bill.

star 7.57
422 votes
Directors: Guillem Morales
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
The Stakeout

#18 - The Stakeout

Season 5 - Episode 6 - Aired Mar 9, 2020

Two police officers have time to get to know each other on the night shift. But PC Thompson's previous partner died in a brutal attack less than a month ago, the forensics have gone missing and PC Varney is beginning to ask a lot of awkward questions.

star 7.54
113 votes
Death Be Not Proud

#19 - Death Be Not Proud

Season 5 - Episode 2 - Aired Feb 10, 2020

Young couple Beattie and Sam are finally on the property ladder, but the only flat they can afford has a dark and sinister past - one that demands to be heard.

star 7.54
134 votes
Diddle Diddle Dumpling

#20 - Diddle Diddle Dumpling

Season 3 - Episode 4 - Aired Mar 14, 2017

After finding a lost shoe in the street, a man becomes fixated on trying to trace its owner.

star 7.34
387 votes
Directors: Guillem Morales
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Thinking Out Loud

#21 - Thinking Out Loud

Season 5 - Episode 5 - Aired Mar 2, 2020

Seven disparate characters share their stories with a camera, their fates inevitably, inextricably and unknowingly set for a head-on collision.

star 7.33
116 votes
The Trial of Elizabeth Gadge

#22 - The Trial of Elizabeth Gadge

Season 2 - Episode 3 - Aired Apr 9, 2015

Two of England's most notorious and feared witch-finders are summoned by Sir Andrew Pike to the unassuming village of Little Happens in order to try an old woman. Elizabeth Gadge stands accused of consorting with the Devil, most lewdly and on divers occasions. If she is found guilty, she will burn. It is very definitely the most exciting event in Little Happens since the business of the escaped cow.

star 7.33
372 votes
Directors: Dan Zeff
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Last Gasp

#23 - Last Gasp

Season 1 - Episode 4 - Aired Feb 26, 2014

Tamsin is a very sick little girl, so Jan and Graham asked WishmakerUK to brighten up their daughter's birthday. The charity is bringing along a very special guest indeed - none other than the legendary singer Frankie J Parsons.

star 7.31
463 votes
Directors: David Kerr
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
The Referee's A W***er

#24 - The Referee's A W***er

Season 5 - Episode 1 - Aired Feb 3, 2020

The beautiful game. The crunch-clash between United and Rovers in the last match of the season, all safely in the care of the four match officials. A tale of promotion, relegation, corruption, and so, so much more.

star 7.27
139 votes
Directors: Matt Lipsey
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton
Seance Time

#25 - Seance Time

Season 2 - Episode 6 - Aired Apr 30, 2015

Having never consulted the spirit world before, Tina isn't quite sure what to expect. Her visit to the spiritualist medium Madam Talbot has been arranged by her sister. Hives, Talbot's assistant in the mundane world, seems quite helpful, but there's something already waiting for Tina on the Other Side, and Hives knows all about it.

star 7.26
381 votes
Directors: Dan Zeff
Writers: Reece Shearsmith, Steve Pemberton