The WORST episodes of RiffTrax

#1 - RiffTrax Live: Starship Troopers

Season 6 - Episode 8 - Aired 8/15/2013

#2 - To Catch a Yeti

Season 1 - Episode 201 - Aired 5/1/2015

To Catch a Yeti. To live a dream. To Meat a Loaf. Some things just seem too good to be true. Meat Loaf, in a movie about a bigfoot? But Meat Loaf isn’t playing the bigfoot? Might seem disappointing, until you find out Meat is instead playing the world’s greatest hunter, Big Jake Grizzly, and his prey is a yeti that’s 2 feet tall and makes the puppetry in Mac & Me look like high art. Even calling the yeti a puppet is really an exaggeration, since basically all it can do is sit still and whimper and blink. But that doesn’t stop it from doing some rad skateboard moves1, because hey, it’s the 90s!!! (1radical skateboard moves = someone dropped this stuffed animal disaster on a board and kicked it down a hill) Against all notions of reason and good taste, a little girl is charmed by the creature and makes him her friend. But there’s also an evil little rich boy (who somehow manages to be even more detestable than the yeti and ‘Loaf COMBINED) who wants the hideous goggle-eyed creature for himself. It all leads to a thrilling hijinks-filled showdown in New York City...or at least, the best fake approximation of New York City to be found in a production so Canadian your screen will ooze maple syrup. Maple syrup, Meat Loaf, a horrific puppet, and more things you’ll never want to eat again after To Catch a Yeti!

#3 - Radical Jack

Season 1 - Episode 200 - Aired 4/24/2015

“We should rip off Road House and Billy Ray Cyrus should play Dalton!” There are two types of people in this world: those who read the above sentence and immediately lapsed into fits of hysterical, table-pounding, pants-wetting laughter. And then the other .00001% of people, who thought “Sounds good to me! Is Michelle Pfeiffer’s sister available to play the love interest?” We have that .00001% to thank for Radical Jack. Eight long years after "Achy Breaky Heart" came out, and approximately 7 years, 364 days, 23 hours, 59 minutes and 34 seconds after the first jukebox playing "Achy Breaky Heart" was smashed with a pool cue, American cinemas got the movie they needed. Except, minor detail, it was actually released direct to video in Russia. Which makes a lot of sense once you see Radical Jack. Fans of Road House will recognize the key points: a loner with a mysterious past comes to town and finds employment at a local dive bar. A local arms dealer has grown rich running the town, despite the fact that its population appears to hover around 35 people. Occasionally Billy Ray takes breaks from doing construction to pour water all over himself in slow motion while seductive music plays1. The only thing missing is the Monster Truck. Once you see the budget on this thing, you’ll understand why they had to leave it out. And Radical Jack doesn’t just rip off one of our all time favorite RiffTrax titles! Shot in Rutland, VT, it features the very time machine from Time Chasers itself!! (AKA, a crappy, weathered small airplane.) Join Mike, Kevin, and Bill for Radical Jack. Just don’t tell their lips, their fingertips, or various other body parts. 1 This never actually happened in the version of Road House that was shown in theaters, but it does in the one that airs on a loop in our hearts.

#4 - The Incredible 2-Headed Transplant

Season 1 - Episode 199 - Aired 4/10/2015

Bruce Dern has it all: A beautiful wife. An expensive house with a pool. A two headed monkey. Casey Kasem for a neighbor. And yet, he’s feeling unfulfilled, perhaps because— What’s that? Oh, you’re right, we did kind of just gloss right over the unusual part of that sentence. Yes, Top 40 DJ Casey Kasem is Bruce’s neighbor. He’s always stopping by to deliver a long distance dedication or prattle on about some dead dog while Bruce is trying to do important stuff, like attach heads to a monkey or an idiot manchild. For you see, Bruce’s entirely normal pastime is figuring out how graft additional heads onto things. Why? Why did Michelangelo paint? Why did Mozart compose? Man is compelled to create, and sometimes what he creates is as stupid as a serial killer’s head sewn onto a local hillbilly’s shoulder. Needless to say, this does not go well. (Both being neighbors with Casey Kasem and the whole 'manufacturing godless abominations in the guest room you converted into a lab' thing.) Come for the mutant in overalls, stay for the wife in a cage, it’s all here in The Incredible 2-Headed Transplant!

#5 - That's Cool, That's Trash: Curse of the Swamp Creature

Season 4 - Episode 830 - Aired 3/26/2015

Matt, Joe, & Kyle are pitted against schlockmeister Larry Buchanan (Attack of the the Eye Creatures) and his made-for-TV Curse of the Swamp Creature! Deep in the swamps of...Texas?...a mad scientific genius attempts to devolve man back to his primitive fish form through gill transplants and dry ice. The local voodoo natives have been the Doc's test subjects, but everything comes to an explosive confrontation when outsiders on a geological oil expedition cross the doctor's path. Stock footage, a maddeningly repetitive score, and a boozed-up John Agar who seems confused as to what he's doing in the film are but a few highlights of this turkey. The boys keep a stiff upper lip and riff, wisecrack, and skewer the movie and...maybe...learn a little something about themselves on the way.

#6 - Rabbit Ears Short #5: Peg Leg Pedro

Season 4 - Episode 829 - Aired 3/26/2015

The gang decide to indulge in Saturday morning cartoons, but aren't prepared for Channel 62's version of the time honored tradition. Peg Leg Pedro is an evil pirate who cares about nothing but treasure, dressing in drag, and abusing his pets.

#7 - Toast and Rice: The Vampire Bat

Season 4 - Episode 828 - Aired 3/26/2015

A series of unexplained murders has a small German village gripped in terror. Two wounds on the victims' necks! The bodies drained of blood! A mysterious figure seen lurking on the rooftops at night! Yes, the once-peaceful hamlet has found itself the victim of the dreaded, horrifying… Dracula ripoff! Or is it? Yes, thanks to the tireless efforts of a detective determined to get the truth even if he has to...well, whine a lot about not believing in vampires, it soon becomes clear that in fact the townsfolk are actually the victims of... A Frankenstein ripoff! How's that for a twist? Try pulling that one off, Shyamalan! No, kidding. Please, don't try pulling that one off.

#8 - MMIP Riffs: Amityville 2: The Possession

Season 4 - Episode 827 - Aired 3/26/2015

Ostensibly a prequel to the inexplicable 1979 hit The Amityville Horror, A2 tells the story of the Montelli family, who move into the infamous house of evil. The movie wants us to believe that Ultimate Evil took a fine, upstanding middle class family and turned them into dysfunctional, sexually abusive assholes, but the Montellis seem to have at least brought the abusive asshole part in with them. After engaging in a few petty poltergeistesque shenanigans, Ultimate Evil decides to take possession of the mind and body of the eldest Montelli son, Sonny. (It wasn’t hard. Both his mind and body were unclaimed at the time.) Soon after, Sonny’s sexually abusing his teenaged sister and acting slightly creepier en route to murdering his entire family. After the murders, a priest swings into the plot to try to perform an exorcism, which, for reasons known only to the screenwriters, has to be performed at the famous Amityville house. A few scenes of exorcism-fu later, Sonny’s dispossessed (though facing five consecutive life terms for his murders), and the priest now houses the soul of Ultimate Evil, though in the plus column that makes him the owner of a lovely three-story Dutch Colonial with a boathouse.

#9 - Netriffs by Sid and Shadow: Atlantis The Lost Empire

Season 4 - Episode 826 - Aired 3/26/2015

Disney's Atlantis The Lost Empire. A little movie that began the death of Disney's Traditional Animated arm. Join us for an "exciting" movie with a submarine that almost has as much screen time as Darth Vader in Episode III. Marvel at a Civiliation that speaks their own language, yet can't read it.

#10 - RiffTrax Live: Santa Claus

Season 6 - Episode 14 - Aired 12/4/2014

Get your magic eye ready as Michael J. Nelson, Kevin Murphy, and Bill Corbett (also known as the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000) present a jolly ol’ riff that will keep you laughing all holiday season long!

#11 - RiffTrax Live: Anaconda

Season 6 - Episode 13 - Aired 10/30/2014

There’s riffs out there this big?? One of our favorites, the movie that’s been called “Probably one of the top four films in the Anaconda series,” Anaconda! Anaconda stars a pre-fame Jennifer Lopez, a post-fame Eric Stoltz, and an Owen Wilson who even then was somehow ashamed of his role in The Internship despite it not happening for another sixteen years. With the help of Ice Cube (Straight Outta Compton, F@%& Da Police, Are We Done Yet?) they set off into the Amazon in search of those drones they claimed were going to revolutionize package delivery.

#12 - RiffTrax Live: Godzilla

Season 6 - Episode 12 - Aired 8/14/2014

#13 - RiffTrax Live: Sharknado

Season 6 - Episode 11 - Aired 7/10/2014

Finally, the acclaimed smash hit RiffTrax Live event of 2014 is now available to own! Considered by many critics to be one of the greatest movies ever made in the “Tornado full of sharks” genre, Sharknado debuted in 2013 to unprecedented buzz. Not since Snakes On A Plane had the internet been so excited about a movie, and not since the late 90s had anyone been so excited about anything starring Tara Reid. From the moment it debuted, Sharknado was one of the most requested titles in RiffTrax history. It makes Jaws IV look like Jaws III, and Jaws III look like Jaws. Riffed LIVE from the State Theater in Minneapolis and broadcast to over 700 theaters across North America, this hilarious live event also features an all-new take on the Mystery Science Theater 3000 fan-favorite short A Case of Spring Fever starring Coily the Spring Sprite! Look, why are you still reading this? It has chainsaws, helicopters dropping bombs, and the aforementioned TORNADO FULL OF SHARKS! Make this new classic a part of your RiffTrax Library today!

#14 - RiffTrax Live: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

Season 6 - Episode 10 - Aired 12/5/2013

Many have forgotten (or choose to forget) the Santa/Martian wars of 1964: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians bravely attempts to set the record straight. Martian parents Kimar and Momar become concerned that their children Bomar and Girmar (are you picking up the “mar” theme? BECAUSE IT’S VERY SUBTLE!) have become too attached to television programs from earth. Their solution is brilliant, if a bit of a non sequitur -- they launch a plan to kidnap Santa Claus! The nasty Martian villain Voldar (his face is coated in green oil and he has a huge mustache, therefore he’s evil) captures two earth children, Billy and Betty, who don’t hold out for even a minute but rat out our fattest, jolliest elf without a struggle. Voldar takes Santa and the children prisoner and heads off for Mars. Only the bravery of Billy and Betty and the bumbling of a stowaway and “the laziest man on Mars”, Droppo, can foil Voldar’s evil plans! Throw into the mix an insane short featuring a pixie named Snoopy, a horrific life size Jack in the Box, and a lion who is oh so proud of his candy eating ability, and you’ve got one of our funniest live shows to date. Please join Mike, Kevin, and Bill for RiffTrax Live: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians!

#15 - RiffTrax Live: Night of the Living Dead

Season 6 - Episode 9 - Aired 10/24/2013

A true cult classic -- and one of the scariest movies of all time. The dead are walking, and they hunger for human flesh. A group of panicked survivors are barricaded in a deserted farmhouse while the army of flesh-eating zombies hovers outside their door. Now experience the bone-chilling terror in color for the first time on DVD! With a 5.1 surround sound remix, and a hilarious commentary track by Michael J. Nelson, this is the most fun you'll ever have with the living dead!

#16 - Warning from Space

Season 2 - Episode 30 - Aired 5/15/2015

You’re a citizen of the world, right? You know about Japanese cinema. You remember Ringu - that horror film you accidentally rented because you thought it was a kids' show about a penguin. You enjoy the majestic historical spectacles of Akira Kurosawa, even though he clearly ripped all his best bits off westerns. You’ve devoured the melancholy, dream-like animations of Studio Ghibli, waiting for a rude bit with tentacles. You’ve watched all the Godzillas - even the good one and Samuel Beckett’s disappointing Waiting for Godzilla. So why haven’t you seen Warning From Space? Eh? Hmm? What‘s not to love in a film bringing together a group of giant one-eyed alien starfish, the nail-biting drama of scientific research1, a rogue planet set on a collision course with our Earth, a lavish song and dance number, and a game of tennis with an alien duplicate? It’s dubbed into English. You won’t need to read or anything. If that wasn’t enough, you can now experience the movie with the added benefit of two Brits talking in the gaps between the weirdly dubbed Japanese people. Amazingly, many of their bits make more sense than the actual story2, and occasionally manage to be funnier than the alien starfish costumes3. 1 There is less drama in scientific research than you may have been led to believe. 2 Not a huge claim. 3 Massive claim. Your money back if you’re prepared to take us to court in an attempt to dispute it and manage to convince the jury.

#17 - RiffTrax Live: Birdemic: Shock and Terror

Season 6 - Episode 7 - Aired 10/25/2012

If you loved the live show the first time you saw it, or missed it because you were too busy hangin' out, hangin' out with your family, now’s your chance to own it! There will be solrpnls, bark beetles and animals such as seals! Plus, the show kicks off with everyone’s favorite lovable loser, Norman, in the short Norman Checks In. Birdemic is one of our favorite bad movies of all time, and there’s no better way to watch it than RiffTrax Live. So grab a coat hanger, fire up your solar powered TV and for the love of god fully vest your stock options! Birdemic!

#18 - RiffTrax Live: Manos the Hands of Fate

Season 6 - Episode 6 - Aired 8/16/2012

For those who missed it in theaters, this is a completely new riff of “Manos” The Hands of Fate, the Texas-fertilizer-salesman-directed classic made famous by Mystery Science Theater 3000. All new jokes, same old Torgo. See Mike, Kevin and Bill riff it all on stage in front of a live audience at the Belcourt Theatre in Nashville! PLUS! Two extra-demented shorts. At Your Fingertips: Cylinders and Welcome Back, Norman which introduced us all to revolting folk hero Norman, along with his now famous (and also revolting) catchphrase.

#19 - RiffTrax Live: Jack the Giant Killer

Season 6 - Episode 5 - Aired 5/1/2012

If you’re into cheesy stop-motion dragons, leprechauns in bottles, drunk Vikings, and Giants-Who-Need-Killing, then Jack the Giant Killer is for you! Actually that’s an odd set of things to be into, hypothetical person reading this, and frankly it’s about time you let us get to the point. Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy, and Bill Corbett riffed this vintage 1962 epic live in Nashville, and now you can enjoy the show in the comfort of your own home, castle, or bottle you share with a leprechaun! Also! The guys riff the supremely weird short What Is Nothing? (spoiler: we still don’t know what nothing is). Plus two hilarious cartoons from Rich “Lowtax” Kyanka of somethingawful.com, a Behind-the-Scenes slideshow, and movie trivia slides done RiffTrax style! Make sure all these giants didn’t die in vain - join Mike, Kevin, and Bill for a full evening of great live comedy.

#20 - RiffTrax Live: House on Haunted Hill

Season 6 - Episode 4 - Aired 5/17/2011

Yes, horror classic House on Haunted Hill provides a mesmerizing walk down “people actually used to find this SCARY?!?” lane. Join the RiffTrax guys as they bring their special brand of rapid-fire comedic commentary to every skeleton-hanging-from-visible-wires, clumsy sexual overtone, and a stunningly inept test pilot whose “heroics” typically lead him to bloody his own nose after locking himself in a broom closet! The guys are joined by guest riffer Paul F. Tompkins, comedy person extraordinaire and quite a snappy dresser to boot! They also riff two vintage, never-before-seen shorts live on-stage: Paper and I, in which a small boy is haunted by a talking paper bag, and Magical Disappearing Money, about a supermarket witch whose main concern is that you don’t spend too much on rice. No, seriously, that’s what they’re really about! Join Mike, Kevin, Bill, and Paul for an unforgetttable All Hallow’s Eve of mind-melting comedy!

#21 - RiffTrax Live: Reefer Madness

Season 6 - Episode 3 - Aired 5/17/2011

In RiffTrax Live: Reefer Madness, Mike, Kevin and Bill deliver their trademark form of rapid fire comedy in front of a live audience! Lines could be flubbed! Tomatoes could be thrown! Mountain lion attacks are entirely possible! The performance not only includes the classic anti-marijuana propaganda film Reefer Madness, but also three shorts which quickly became instant classics: More Dangerous Than Dynamite, Frozen Frolics, and At Your Fingertips: Grasses. Among the most insane things the guys have ever riffed, they’ll clear up any questions you might have about washing your clothes in gasoline and whether corn is grass.

#22 - RiffTrax Live: Christmas Shorts-stravaganza!

Season 6 - Episode 2 - Aired 3/17/2010

The stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000® have a sackfull of delightful and demented shorts to riff live onstage. Some of the forgotten gems of Christmases past prove to be the perfect targets for the rapid-fire riffs of Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett. And if that wasn’t enough, they’re even joined by comedy legend “Weird Al" Yankovic for a musical short about the wonders of pork! It’s funnier than Ernest Saves Christmas and far less creepy than The Polar Express!

#23 - RiffTrax Live: Plan 9 From Outer Space

Season 6 - Episode 1 - Aired 12/10/2009

The stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 meet the worst movie of all time to bring you RiffTrax Live. Join Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett live and onstage at the historic Belcourt Theater in Nashville as they riff along hilariously to Ed Wood’s classic B-movie blunder Plan 9 from Outer Space. Hosted by internet superstar Veronica Belmont, and featuring geek troubadour Jonathan Coulton, RiffTrax Live offers non-stop music and laughs. Also included is Flying Stewardess, a 40’s travel short that gets subjected to the guys’ signature brand of rapid-fire riffing.

#24 - The Hideous Sun Demon

Season 1 - Episode 198 - Aired 3/20/2015

This is the tale of a man who transforms into a violent lizard creature whenever he’s in the sun too long. No, he’s not the third wheel love interest in an upcoming Twilight reboot, he’s The Hideous Sun Demon! It’s the late 50s, a time when exposure to radiation still caused fun stuff, like superpowers and shape-changing, as opposed to less fun stuff, like, y’know, death. After some radioactive material falls off the toy train the scientists use to transport it through the lab (actual plot point, not a joke) mild-mannered genius drunk Dr. Gilbert McKenna is changed forever. Sunlight turns him into a reptile man-monster, presumably because that’s the rubber suit that was cheapest to rent when they made this movie. But not cheap enough for them to rent the bottom part of the suit, apparently, because he runs around in totally soaked khaki pants for roughly half the movie. Why are his pants so wet? That’s just part of the mystery! It’s a superhuman dose of old-fashioned nuclear mutation fun, stay out of direct sunlight and join Mike, Kevin and Bill for The Hideous Sun Demon!

#25 - Anaconda

Season 1 - Episode 197 - Aired 3/14/2015

There’s riffs out there this big?? One of our favorites, now available as a studio riff, the movie that’s been called “Probably one of the top four films in the Anaconda series,” Anaconda! Anaconda stars a pre-fame Jennifer Lopez, a post-fame Eric Stoltz, and an Owen Wilson who even then was somehow ashamed of his role in The Internship despite it not happening for another sixteen years. With the help of Ice Cube (Straight Outta Compton, F@%& Da Police, Are We Done Yet?) they set off into the Amazon in search of those drones they claimed were going to revolutionize package delivery. Then Eric Stoltz gets stung and paralyzed by a venomous wasp, so things are really looking up for our crew when they encounter Jon Voight. Voight has been obsessed with hunting down a deadly anaconda ever since the snake tricked him into selling his beloved Chrysler LeBaron to George Costanza. From then on, things spiral into a deadly game of cat and mouse, one where the cat is played by a snake, and the mouse is played by Danny Trejo. And, as if that wasn't enough, at one point the anaconda spits a monkey right at a man’s face! How many movies can say that? Don’t miss out! Original film made in 1997.