The Brittas Empire

The WORST episodes of The Brittas Empire

Every episode ever - ranked by fan votes!

Gordon Brittas is a Leisure Centre manager with a dream. Due to the unexplained collapse of his last Leisure Centre during his time in temporary charge, he was given a glowing reference and 'encouraged' to take up a managerial position at Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre. His 'loyal' staff have stories of their own, like Carole Parkinson, the receptionist, whose husband has left her, forcing her to keep her baby in the drawer under her desk. Also Tim Whistler and Gavin Featherly, the fitness instructors whose relationship Brittas always seems to be oblivious to. Julie Porter, Brittas' secretary, is always 'too busy' to do anything for him, and constantly looking for chances to show him up. Linda Perkin, the ever-ready staff member who always believes what Brittas says is best. Laura Lancing, Brittas' hard-working deputy manager is in and out of relationships with her estranged husband, Michael T. Farrell. Finally, Colin Weatherby, Brittas' deputy manager is keen and devoted to anything Brittas says is best, but isn't the cleanest or healthiest of people and always has a bandage over the wound on his hand. Whatever chaotic incidents occur, Brittas and his staff emerge unscathed, from ceiling collapses, rooms full of ice, other world invaders, tropical spiders and propane gas explosions.

Last Updated: 5/19/2022Network: BBC One
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Opening Day
star
8.09
91 votes

#1 - Opening Day

Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired 1/10/1991

I'ts Opening Day at Whitbury Leisure Centre and Gordon is getting ready to meet the Duchess of Kent. But things are going wrong when the electric doors aren't working properly and the water from the swimming pool is disappearing and the temperature rises. Will Gordon sort it all out before the Duchess of Kent arrives?

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Underwater Wedding
star
8.22
83 votes

#2 - Underwater Wedding

Season 1 - Episode 4 - Aired 1/31/1991

While doing an interview with Beverly, Gordon realizes that the best man for the underwater wedding that is happening in the pool is in trouble. Gavin is asked to help and then a disabled man in an electric wheel chair ends up getting drunk and starts causing trouble. Gordon is ready to stop the drunk but his ends up sending Gavin to hospital. Will Gordon stop the drunk?

That Creeping Feeling
star
8.32
71 votes

#3 - That Creeping Feeling

Season 3 - Episode 2 - Aired 1/14/1993

After the trial the Staff are ignoring Gordon and Laura explains why. Gordon decides to arrange an appointment with a phychologist. Meanwhile he also gets a parcel from and old rival which is strange because all there is is leaves and even Gavin discovers a half eaten spider. Linda goes to find out why and then she comes up with the answer. It gets worse when Colin gets bitten by a poisonous spider.

Not a Good Day ...
star
8.38
72 votes

#4 - Not a Good Day ...

Season 4 - Episode 1 - Aired 1/10/1994

It's Life Cycle Week at Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre and Sebastian Coe MP has come to the centre to broadcast the news on this occasion. Then there's a shock when a cyclist dies and the cyclist's wife gets very upset. Meanwhile Ben manages to make his way to the vents and Carole and Helen try to get him out of there. Then a centurion has a fight with Gordon because his son has be arrested. Then the centurion and the 'Classical War Society' start a war which brings disaster to the centre.

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Laying the Foundations
star
8.51
76 votes

#5 - Laying the Foundations

Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired 1/3/1991

Gordon Brittas is the manager at Whitbury Leisure Centre. The builders are laying the foundations but Gordon is very rude to one of the workers and they go on strike. He causes more trouble when he upsets one of the staff members and he's in for it when he is having a meeting with the staff.

Stop Thief
star
8.75
51 votes

#6 - Stop Thief

Season 1 - Episode 5 - Aired 2/7/1991

Things have gone missing and Gordon has closed the centre for the day. He explains that there could be a thief about and sets a trap to catch the thief. The plan is to hide in a locker and sees who takes the bait (his wallet). Meanwhile Helen is suffering more stress then ever and takes Gordon to see the doctor leaving Colin to hide in the locker. That afternoon it turns out there isn't a thief but Colin is left hanging on the rail still in the locker.

Temple of the Body
star
8.76
49 votes

#7 - Temple of the Body

Season 2 - Episode 2 - Aired 1/9/1992

Brittas is horrified to discover women's underwear in his office, and is convinced that a staff member is using the facilities to have sex. He segregates the sexes and bugs Linda; the evidence gathered leads him to Gavin. The real culprit is in fact Helen, who discovers Gordon unknowingly had sex with Carol at a fancy dress party. Simultaneously, Julie is being hounded by reporters for rescuing a dog from a river in the nude..

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Bye Bye Baby
star
8.86
58 votes

#8 - Bye Bye Baby

Season 1 - Episode 3 - Aired 1/24/1991

Carole has heard that her husband Derek is coming back, after what happened a long time ago. After all these years she will not have to work, Ben will have a father and she will feel much better. Meanwhile her baby goes missing and reception is getting crowded. Gordon tries to help tells Colin to find the baby and return it. Unfortunately Colin ends up returning the wrong baby. Then Gordon sorts out a man who has escaped a lot of stress. Will everything go right?

Back from the Dead
star
8.98
45 votes

#9 - Back from the Dead

Season 2 - Episode 1 - Aired 1/2/1992

Gordon is away at a conference in Bulgaria. Meanwhile the Leisure Centre is low on visitors, then news spreads that Gordon is dead. Everyone is happy and the centre is pouring with visitors. All goes well until Gordon comes back, which gives everyone a shock - especially Carole, who thinks that Gordon is back from the dead.

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An Inspector Calls
star
9.00
48 votes

#10 - An Inspector Calls

Season 2 - Episode 3 - Aired 1/16/1992

Brittas fears for his job when the Southern Area Inspector visits, fully aware that visiting figures are poor. Colin accidentally causes a pigeon to roost in the gymnasium, leading to a chain of chaotic trivialities threatening the inspection. Helen meanwhile has been insulted by a badly chosen birthday present, a moped with a yellow helmet reading "Hi I'm Helen", thus she decides to leave Gordon.

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Assassin
star
9.08
49 votes

#11 - Assassin

Season 1 - Episode 6 - Aired 2/14/1991

Gordon is dealing with two problems today. He has heard that the centre is getting low on visitors and that someone is trying to kill him. All over the centre the killer is still trying to kill Gordon, but each time it goes wrong. Then the most dangerous attempt is going to be made. Who is the killer and what will happen to Gordon?

Mums and Dads
star
9.09
45 votes

#12 - Mums and Dads

Season 2 - Episode 5 - Aired 1/30/1992

The centre is preparing for a concert by Vladimir Petrov, a visiting pianist from the Leningrad Conservatory. Brittas’s father arrives with an old piano, which after being dropped knocks the pianist unconscious. As a result, Gordon decides to perform the concert himself.

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Set In Concrete
star
9.15
47 votes

#13 - Set In Concrete

Season 2 - Episode 4 - Aired 1/23/1992

An extreme argument with the Rotary Club has caused Brittas's feet to be set in concrete, who after frequent fights breaking out, considers if the centre has Sick Building Syndrome; a Specialist arrives. However Laura tries to explain to Brittas that it is he who is the cause of the centre's problems.

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UXB
star
9.17
42 votes

#14 - UXB

Season 5 - Episode 7 - Aired 12/12/1994

Colin discovers an unexploded missile in the basement and tries to warn Gordon but he takes no notice and tells him to sort out his problems on his own. While doing this on his own Gordon is packing his things away for his departure for Brussels. Then Colin gets hit on the head by a croquet ball by Gavin and Tim and Colin ends up being rushed to hospital. Then no one knows but Colin had put the missile in the racket box and tries to warn everyone but everyone is having a party for their new futures.

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The Trial
star
9.18
45 votes

#15 - The Trial

Season 3 - Episode 1 - Aired 1/7/1993

The staff of Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre have sent Gordon to Coventry because Gordon is on trial for murdering strange people. The prosecutor explains that there is someone in the Centre who doesn't like Gordon and will stick glue to anything he touches. Two cases of money have been found in a locker and locker keys end up behind the toilets. When Gordon switches on the chainsaw he is sure to be guilty not until Eddie comes to the rescue.

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The Elephants' Child
star
9.18
39 votes

#16 - The Elephants' Child

Season 7 - Episode 1 - Aired 1/6/1997

Brittas organizes a sponsored bungee jump and expects his staff to take part. Helen Brittas plans a burglary to fund her bid for the franchise for the sauna solarium and Carole returns from her assertion course.

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Back with a Bang
star
9.19
42 votes

#17 - Back with a Bang

Season 6 - Episode 1 - Aired 2/27/1996

After being crushed to death Gordon Brittas has been returned to earth by St. Peter and rebuilt at a Swiss clinic. He returns a day early and misses the red carpet welcome prepared by his staff.

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New Generations
star
9.19
47 votes

#18 - New Generations

Season 2 - Episode 7 - Aired 2/20/1992

A pregnant cow, loose in the centre, accidentally eats some of Colin's "herbs", sending it into labour on the squash courts. Carole has also eaten the leaves, and her babies end up being delivered by the vet who had originally come to assist the cow.

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Safety First
star
9.20
44 votes

#19 - Safety First

Season 2 - Episode 6 - Aired 2/13/1992

Gordon is practicing a fire drill and makes it more complicating then ever. Meanwhile Helen is planning a picnic in Gordon's office and wants Gordon to be at the picnic. But Gordon seems to be very busy which makes Helen very upset. Mrs Dapping has come and Gordon tells her about the faulty fire exit. Mrs Dapping takes no notice until a fire erupts from the Lost Property cupboard which causes disaster.

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The Old, Old Story
star
9.24
42 votes

#20 - The Old, Old Story

Season 5 - Episode 1 - Aired 10/31/1994

After the building was destroyed by a large fire. Gordon is now back as Manager of the centre. 'Songs of Praise' is going to be held at Whitbury Newtown Leisure Centre. Gordon is very excited and he and Helen are going for a review with the presenter of 'Songs of Praise'. But then trouble starts when a serial killer maybe on the lose after a few accidents happen. Gordon is determined that the recording of 'Songs of Praise' must go on. But then he ends up face-to-face when the verial killer turns out to be an ostrich.

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Pregnant
star
9.24
41 votes

#21 - Pregnant

Season 5 - Episode 6 - Aired 12/5/1994

Gordon Brittas is doing Urine tests on his staff. He thinks that the women in the centre are pregnant. Everyone is shocked and surprised especially Carole when she can't believe what she has heard. Gordon tells her that she may have to marry Colin if he's the father of Carole's child. Then disaster strikes when Gordon tells Tim that he might be pregnant. Tim is shocked and denies that he isn't a women. Gavin rescues Tim and punches Gordon in the nose. Meanwhile Julie is feeling very happy when she finds someone that she loves, but then she gets the blame when it turns out the urine samples were dropped and disarranged.

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The Last Day
star
9.24
41 votes

#22 - The Last Day

Season 5 - Episode 8 - Aired 12/19/1994

Gordon is ready to leave for Brussels but Helen isn't to keen on going. Then she sees Gordon's pictures and the hotel and decides to go with him. Gordon offers his Management to Laura but she is going to America for he baby to be raised. Everyone is excited but Gordon then says that due to an unreplied message he won't be going. An emergency water tank is installed and then makes the ceiling collapse. Carole is on trouble when she gets stuck in her toy car. Then Gordon pushes Carole but is too late to get himself clear. This then means the end for Gordon Brittas.

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Laura's Leaving
star
9.24
45 votes

#23 - Laura's Leaving

Season 3 - Episode 3 - Aired 1/21/1993

Laura is going for a job interview and Helen is not happy about it. She is worried because what is Laura is takes the job and has to resign. Gordon is busy because people from Church are going the do a baptism session. A customer is trying to get a cup of coffee but has a problem every time. Meanwhile Colin feels different somehow and ends up causing a very disastrous situation by electrocuting the people from Church. Colin is given his punishment then Carole gets fired and everyone is very cross with Gordon. Then a surprise comes when Laura comes back.

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The Boss
star
9.27
41 votes

#24 - The Boss

Season 5 - Episode 5 - Aired 11/28/1994

Gordon Brittas explains that Gavin will be taking over as trial manager for one day. Gavin is really excited and soon starts enjoying it. But then he is told about emergency situations like pregnences, marooned school buses and poisonous gas leaks. Gordon is testing out his abilities and Tim is not to pleased. Being tired and worried Gordon takes over when things start to go wrong. Meanwhile Carole is going out for the day but is shocked to discover that her friend is dead.

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Body Language
star
9.27
41 votes

#25 - Body Language

Season 6 - Episode 2 - Aired 3/12/1996

Gordon tries to explain benefits of matching and mirroring body language. Colin suspects alien invasion when a green block of ice crashes through the roof, and Helen mistakenly sells the house to a member of the U.S. military.

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