The WORST episodes of Open All Hours
Every episode of Open All Hours ever, ranked from worst to best by thousands of votes from fans of the show. The worst episodes of Open All Hours!
Arkwright is a tight-fisted shop owner in Doncaster, who will stop at nothing to keep his profits high and his overheads low, even if this means harassing his nephew Granville. Arkwright's only weakness is his love - Nurse Gladys Emanuel.
#1 - Fig Biscuits and Inspirational Toilet Rolls
Season 2 - Episode 3 - Aired 3/18/1981
Arkwright once again is struggling to sell goods that no-one wants to buy. He therefore tries a special promotion to get rid of the goods, namely fig biscuits and toilet rolls with messages printed on them.
#2 - The Errand Boy Executive
Season 4 - Episode 4 - Aired 9/22/1985
Granville takes a fancy to Stephanie (""with a p-h"") who works in a boutique. He pretends that he is a young executive and that Arkwright is his assistant. Needless to say, Arkwright does not agree with this role-reversal.
#3 - The Man from Down Under
Season 3 - Episode 5 - Aired 4/18/1982
Arkwright has a rival for Nurse Gladys Emmanuel's attention, as a visitor from Australia returns to his old stomping ground.
#4 - Duet for Solo Bicycle
Season 3 - Episode 3 - Aired 4/4/1982
A grocer's bike with a squeaky wheel is definitely ruining Granville's attempts to woo the girls, especially Wendy who suffers the embarrassment of being escorted by Granville and his squeak!
#5 - Well Catered Funeral
Season 1 - Episode 5 - Aired 3/19/1976
Parslow, an old friend of Arkwright dies and Arkwright handles the catering for the funeral, hopefully with a large profit coming his way!
#6 - How to Ignite Your Errand Boy...
Season 3 - Episode 4 - Aired 4/11/1982
Granville is tasked with making home-made firelighters, an essential ingredient being his shredded disco shirt.
#7 - The Cool Cocoa Tin Lid
Season 3 - Episode 6 - Aired 4/25/1982
Granville gets rid of his old image by wearing shades and snappy threads, complete with a ""medallion"" made out of a cocoa tin lid.
#8 - The Reluctant Traveller
Season 2 - Episode 2 - Aired 3/8/1981
Nurse Gladys Emmanuel and Arkwright are finally going to spend the night away at a hotel. Little does she know that the hotel is round the block! Whilst they are away, Granville is entertaining the milk-woman. Arkwright also has a problem with an over-tight money belt!
#9 - The Ginger Men
Season 3 - Episode 2 - Aired 3/28/1982
Once again Arkwright has overstocked on goods. This time he has a consignment of Ginger Cake to get rid of. By pretending that it has aphrodisiac properties, he hopes to sell the lot.
#10 - Happy Birthday, Arkwright!
Season 4 - Episode 5 - Aired 9/29/1985
Arkwright is on the alert after Nurse Gladys Emmanuel and Granville tell him that a man from the ""Good Shop Guide"" is visiting shops in the area. It is only a ruse by Granville and Nurse Gladys to teach Arkwright a lesson in good manners. Nurse Gladys dresses up as a man and is on the receiving end of some very polite behaviour from Arkwright.
#11 - The Housekeeper Caper
Season 4 - Episode 3 - Aired 9/15/1985
Arkwright decides that to make Nurse Gladys Emmanuel jealous, he will advertise in the local paper for a live-in housekeeper. Unfortunately he is not prepared for Mrs Delphine Featherstone applying for the position!
#12 - Shedding at the Wedding
Season 2 - Episode 6 - Aired 4/5/1981
Arkwright goes to a wedding with Nurse Gladys Emmanuel. His suit smells of mothballs and he has to hang his trousers out of Gladys' car to air them. After his trousers are blown away and run over by a tractor, he has to borrow her trousers!
#13 - An Errand Boy by the Ear
Season 3 - Episode 1 - Aired 3/21/1982
The customers are upset by Granville continually being dragged around by the ear by Arkwright
#14 - Soulmate Wanted
Season 4 - Episode 1 - Aired 9/1/1985
Granville advertises for female company and ends up with more than he can handle.
#15 - Full Of Mysterious Promise
Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired 2/20/1976
Arkwright buys a load of damaged goods. The snag with them is that they are tinned goods without labels! He then tries to foist them off onto his customers.
#16 - Apples and Self Service
Season 1 - Episode 6 - Aired 3/26/1976
Arkwright starts a sales drive to try and get rid of a large stock of apples that he had over-ordered.
#17 - A Nice Cosy Little Disease
Season 1 - Episode 3 - Aired 3/5/1976
Arkwright tries to find the perfect disease to pretend to go down with in order to get the attention of Nurse Gladys Emmanuel who he feels has been neglecting him.
#18 - Arkwright's Mobile Store
Season 2 - Episode 5 - Aired 3/29/1981
In a bid to prove to Nurse Gladys Emmanuel that he means to expand his business, he buys a van so that Arkwright's Stores can have a mobile store.
#19 - Horse-Trading
Season 4 - Episode 2 - Aired 9/8/1985
Arkwright smugly offloads a lot of clothes-horses to an rival Asian shopkeeper. However, when his rival starts making large profits using the clothes-horses as bait for customers, he makes Granville dress up as an Asian woman so that he can buy the clothes-horses back.
#20 - A Mattress On Wheels
Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired 2/27/1976
Granville is fed up with having to do his rounds on his bike and tries to talk Arkwright into buying a van. Granville hopes that a mattress in the back of it will help his love life - and maybe Arkwright's, too!
#21 - The Mystical Boudoir of Nurse Gladys Emmanuel
Season 4 - Episode 6 - Aired 10/6/1985
Arkwright tries all manner of things in order to get himself into Nurse Gladys Emmanuel's bedroom, including the use of a ladder and a box of chocolates. Meanwhile Granville takes to wearing tights on his head.
#22 - The New Suit
Season 2 - Episode 4 - Aired 3/22/1981
Arkwright has to buy a new suit - on Nurse Gladys Emmanuel's say so.
#23 - Laundry Blues
Season 2 - Episode 1 - Aired 3/1/1981
Nurse Gladys Emmanuel, having seen Granville struggling with the washing, tells Arkwright that he must buy a new washing machine. Arkwright has to come up with a plan so that she thinks he has done as she requests. He gets Neville to drop off a new machine, sneak round the back of the shop and take it away again, leaving behind a second-hand machine instead!
#24 - St. Albert's Day
Season 2 - Episode 7 - Aired 4/19/1981
Arkwright invents a Saint's day so that Granville can check the pockets of a foreign visitor who he suspects of shoplifting.
#25 - Beware Of The Dog
Season 1 - Episode 4 - Aired 3/12/1976
After a bungled burglary on his premises, Arkwright decided the time is right for a guard dog for the shop. However, instead of a real dog, he tries to fool everyone with just the sound of a dog! Meanwhile, Granville thinks he could be the father of Maureen's baby, Eric!