The BEST Episodes of Married

Every episode ever - ranked by fan votes!

Last Updated: Jun 6, 2020

Network: FX

Married is a half hour comedy about being miserably in love. Russ and Lina Bowman can barely remember what was like before kids, debt, and suburbia rained on their romance -- but every once in a while, in between the arguments about their declining sex life and who's driving carpool, they are reminded what drew them together in the first place -- they're best friends. The show also features Russ and Lina's friend AJ who is recently divorced and pretending he's over his wife, and their other friend Jess who is married to a much older man who can't keep up with her.

Pimps

#1 - Pimps

Season 2 - Episode 5 - Aired Aug 13, 2015

Russ and Lina go to extreme lengths for a family vacation.

star 8.06
124 votes
Directors: Nisha Ganatra
Writers: Samantha McIntyre
The Cruise

#2 - The Cruise

Season 2 - Episode 7 - Aired Aug 27, 2015

Lina helps Russ manage his relationship with his mother.

star 8.01
120 votes
Directors: Jamie Babbit
Writers: Daisy Gardner
Mother's Day

#3 - Mother's Day

Season 2 - Episode 8 - Aired Sep 3, 2015

Lina bails on her Mother's Day brunch.

star 7.99
131 votes
Directors: Andrew Gurland
Writers: Andrew Gurland, Daisy Gardner
Murder!

#4 - Murder!

Season 2 - Episode 6 - Aired Aug 20, 2015

Lina and Russ play hooky from work to investigate the man living in their guest house.

star 7.97
127 votes
Directors: Jamie Babbit
Writers: BJ Porter
The Playdate

#5 - The Playdate

Season 1 - Episode 5 - Aired Aug 14, 2014

Russ and Lina get roped into an awkward playdate. Jess helps AJ get rid of an unwanted houseguest.

star 7.89
221 votes
Directors: Jamie Babbit
Writers: Jennifer Joyce
Invisible Man

#6 - Invisible Man

Season 1 - Episode 6 - Aired Aug 21, 2014

Russ's refusal to have his semen tested results in an unexpected climax.

star 7.86
243 votes
Directors: Jamie Babbit
Writers: Dan O'Keefe
Uncool

#7 - Uncool

Season 1 - Episode 4 - Aired Aug 7, 2014

An overdue orthodontist bill forces Russ and Lina to be uncool.

star 7.85
225 votes
Directors: Adam Davidson
Writers: Andrew Gurland, Sam Sklaver
Waffles & Pizza

#8 - Waffles & Pizza

Season 1 - Episode 7 - Aired Aug 28, 2014

AJ & Lina encourage Russ to consider a shady real estate deal. Jess's boss puts her in an uncompromising position.

star 7.75
229 votes
Directors: Huck Botko
Writers: Andrew Gurland, Salamo Levin
Family Day

#9 - Family Day

Season 1 - Episode 10 - Aired Sep 18, 2014

When Russ, Lina and Jess visit AJ at rehab, everyone's issues come to a head.

star 7.74
223 votes
Directors: Andrew Gurland
Writers: Andrew Gurland, Daisy Gardner
The Waiter

#10 - The Waiter

Season 2 - Episode 13 - Aired Oct 1, 2015

Russ and his assistant start to get too close; Lina and AJ work together on a children's play about the dangers of addiction.

star 7.59
92 votes
Directors: Andrew Gurland
Writers: Samantha McIntyre
Guardians

#11 - Guardians

Season 2 - Episode 9 - Aired Sep 10, 2015

Russ and Lina try to figure out who gets the kids if they die.

star 7.54
90 votes
Directors: Nisha Ganatra
Writers: Andrew Gurland, Daisy Gardner
Halloween

#12 - Halloween

Season 1 - Episode 9 - Aired Sep 11, 2014

Russ & Jess take an unwilling AJ to rehab.

star 7.53
253 votes
Directors: Huck Botko
Writers: Dan O'Keefe
Aftershocks

#13 - Aftershocks

Season 2 - Episode 2 - Aired Jul 23, 2015

Lina and Russ let the wrong friends host her 40th birthday party.

star 7.51
141 votes
Directors: Jamie Babbit
Writers: Samantha McIntyre
The Sandwich

#14 - The Sandwich

Season 2 - Episode 3 - Aired Jul 30, 2015

Russ and Lina go out on separate dates.

star 7.47
142 votes
Directors: Jamie Babbit
Writers: Ari Posner
The Getaway

#15 - The Getaway

Season 1 - Episode 3 - Aired Jul 31, 2014

Russ and Lina go on a romantic getaway. Jess gets in trouble for sexting her neighbor.

star 7.45
270 votes
Directors: Jesse Peretz
Writers: Kevin Napier
Koreatown

#16 - Koreatown

Season 2 - Episode 4 - Aired Aug 6, 2015

Russ and AJ have a big night out. Lina tries to be the cool mom.

star 7.44
105 votes
Directors: Nisha Ganatra
Writers: Laura Moses, Michelle Gurland
Pilot

#17 - Pilot

Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired Jul 17, 2014

Russ develops an inappropriate relationship with a waxing technician.

star 7.39
368 votes
Directors: Andrew Gurland
Writers: Andrew Gurland
Gymnastics

#18 - Gymnastics

Season 2 - Episode 12 - Aired Oct 1, 2015

Russ and Lina bump into Russ's old flame at a gymnastics meet.

star 7.36
98 votes
Directors: Jay Karas
Writers: Dan O'Keefe
The Old Date

#19 - The Old Date

Season 1 - Episode 8 - Aired Sep 4, 2014

Russ & Lina have a date night in their old neighborhood. AJ and Bernie take a detour on the way to a gentlemen's club.

star 7.32
231 votes
Directors: Huck Botko
Writers: Daisy Gardner
Thanksgiving

#20 - Thanksgiving

Season 2 - Episode 1 - Aired Jul 16, 2015

Russ and Lina have an unexpected Thanksgiving, while Jess and AJ pretend they don't know each other.

star 7.31
118 votes
Directors: Jamie Babbit
Writers: Daisy Gardner
The Shower

#21 - The Shower

Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired Jul 24, 2014

AJ and Jess hijack Russ and Lina's night out.

star 7.26
302 votes
Directors: Jesse Peretz
Writers: Andrew Gurland, Salamo Levin
1997

#22 - 1997

Season 2 - Episode 10 - Aired Sep 17, 2015

Russ and Lina get nostalgic when they go back to their old school and carry on like they used to.

star 7.26
93 votes
Directors: Jamie Babbit
Writers: Kevin Napier
Triggers

#23 - Triggers

Season 2 - Episode 11 - Aired Sep 24, 2015

AJ ropes Russ into working on a children's book; Lina butts heads with Abby's ex.

star 7.24
85 votes
Directors: Jay Karas
Writers: Kevin Napier, Salamo Levin