The BEST Episodes of Married
Every episode ever - ranked by fan votes!
Last Updated: Mar 20, 2021
Married is a half hour comedy about being miserably in love. Russ and Lina Bowman can barely remember what was like before kids, debt, and suburbia rained on their romance -- but every once in a while, in between the arguments about their declining sex life and who's driving carpool, they are reminded what drew them together in the first place -- they're best friends. The show also features Russ and Lina's friend AJ who is recently divorced and pretending he's over his wife, and their other friend Jess who is married to a much older man who can't keep up with her.
#1 - Pimps
Season 2 - Episode 5 - Aired Aug 13, 2015
Russ and Lina go to extreme lengths for a family vacation.
#2 - The Cruise
Season 2 - Episode 7 - Aired Aug 27, 2015
Lina helps Russ manage his relationship with his mother.
#3 - Mother's Day
Season 2 - Episode 8 - Aired Sep 3, 2015
Lina bails on her Mother's Day brunch.
#4 - Murder!
Season 2 - Episode 6 - Aired Aug 20, 2015
Lina and Russ play hooky from work to investigate the man living in their guest house.
#5 - The Playdate
Season 1 - Episode 5 - Aired Aug 14, 2014
Russ and Lina get roped into an awkward playdate. Jess helps AJ get rid of an unwanted houseguest.
#6 - Invisible Man
Season 1 - Episode 6 - Aired Aug 21, 2014
Russ's refusal to have his semen tested results in an unexpected climax.
#7 - Uncool
Season 1 - Episode 4 - Aired Aug 7, 2014
An overdue orthodontist bill forces Russ and Lina to be uncool.
#8 - Family Day
Season 1 - Episode 10 - Aired Sep 18, 2014
When Russ, Lina and Jess visit AJ at rehab, everyone's issues come to a head.
#9 - Waffles & Pizza
Season 1 - Episode 7 - Aired Aug 28, 2014
AJ & Lina encourage Russ to consider a shady real estate deal. Jess's boss puts her in an uncompromising position.
#10 - The Waiter
Season 2 - Episode 13 - Aired Oct 1, 2015
Russ and his assistant start to get too close; Lina and AJ work together on a children's play about the dangers of addiction.
#11 - Guardians
Season 2 - Episode 9 - Aired Sep 10, 2015
Russ and Lina try to figure out who gets the kids if they die.
#12 - Aftershocks
Season 2 - Episode 2 - Aired Jul 23, 2015
Lina and Russ let the wrong friends host her 40th birthday party.
#13 - Halloween
Season 1 - Episode 9 - Aired Sep 11, 2014
Russ & Jess take an unwilling AJ to rehab.
#14 - Koreatown
Season 2 - Episode 4 - Aired Aug 6, 2015
Russ and AJ have a big night out. Lina tries to be the cool mom.
#15 - The Sandwich
Season 2 - Episode 3 - Aired Jul 30, 2015
Russ and Lina go out on separate dates.
#16 - The Getaway
Season 1 - Episode 3 - Aired Jul 31, 2014
Russ and Lina go on a romantic getaway. Jess gets in trouble for sexting her neighbor.
#17 - Pilot
Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired Jul 17, 2014
Russ develops an inappropriate relationship with a waxing technician.
#18 - Gymnastics
Season 2 - Episode 12 - Aired Oct 1, 2015
Russ and Lina bump into Russ's old flame at a gymnastics meet.
#19 - Thanksgiving
Season 2 - Episode 1 - Aired Jul 16, 2015
Russ and Lina have an unexpected Thanksgiving, while Jess and AJ pretend they don't know each other.
#20 - The Old Date
Season 1 - Episode 8 - Aired Sep 4, 2014
Russ & Lina have a date night in their old neighborhood. AJ and Bernie take a detour on the way to a gentlemen's club.
#21 - The Shower
Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired Jul 24, 2014
AJ and Jess hijack Russ and Lina's night out.
#22 - 1997
Season 2 - Episode 10 - Aired Sep 17, 2015
Russ and Lina get nostalgic when they go back to their old school and carry on like they used to.
#23 - Triggers
Season 2 - Episode 11 - Aired Sep 24, 2015
AJ ropes Russ into working on a children's book; Lina butts heads with Abby's ex.