The BEST episodes written by Steve Coogan
#1 - Episode 6
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 6
In this series finale, Alan dances with the Alan Partridge playmates- a group of women wearing skirts, blazers and Alan Partridge masks. He then meets the child actors, Scott and Dean McLean. They are unimpressed by his gifts of a toy car and a mask and his confusement of the term CD-ROM with the name Seedy Ron. He then speaks to the two lesbians who are due to host the show for gays and lesbians to take the slot KMKYWAP was in. He comes up with numerous names for Wanda Harvey and Bridey McMahon before they come up with anagrams. Alan is displeased to find that porn legend is an anagram of Glen Ponder, whereas anal dirgeprat is one of Alan Partridge. Then, the crap comedian Joe Beasley tells some awful jokes with a small monkey puppet. Alan then meets the restaurant critic for the Spectator, Forbes McAllister. Forbes bought a load of Byron memorabilia in an auction because Michael Winner was bidding for it.
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#2 - Episode 5
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 5
On this show, Alan was forced to reinstate Glen Ponder after legal action was threatened; he irritated the boxing promoter, Terry Norton, by constantly referring to an incident which involved Terry, during which a man was murdered; he then met the widow and son of another Alan Partridge, whom he presented with a gravestone with the wrong date of birth on it. Terry and the relatives of the dead man were then invited to judge the Miss. Norwich beauty contest, which was fixed so that a girl Alan liked won. After that, a political debate was held discussing the by-election that was due to take place when a sitting MP, Sir Morris Christopher [a nod to Chris Morris] died after choking on scampi. A man from a stupid party, the Bald Brummies against the big footed conspiracy party caused chaos in the studio after he repeatedly interrupted the fellow candidates, causing the Tory candidate to brand him "a bloody shit" and violently attack him.
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#3 - Episode 3
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 3
In this edition, Alan sang a duet with the American singing sensation, Gina Langland. She grossly annoyed him by thinking his name was Alec. He then met the celebrity publicist Laurence Noels. He had just released a book showing photographs of the Royal Family participating in recreational activities. Alan had got video footage of Laurence parking across a disabled parking space, eating mucus from his nose and visiting a dermatologist. Laurence's dermatologist, Clive brought the amount of hair removed from Laurence's back in an average session claiming it was enough to cover twelve young children. Then, Alan met three old women who were athletes in the 1936 Berlin olympic relay race. They slowly walked around a sixth scale reproduction of the stadium in the studio. Alan then got naked and sat in a jacuzzi, eagerly awaiting the dance group, Hot Pants. He was much less eager when they ran into the studio- they were men. They stripped down to their underpants and handcuffed themselves to him.
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#4 - Alan Partridge: Out of the Box Thinker
Mid Morning Matters with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 10
Alan and Simon are joined in the studio by Daniel, who has made a lot of money on the internet.
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#5 - Episode 4
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 4
In this episode, supposedly from Paris, Alan is given a French co-host, Nina Varnier who annoys Alan with her knowledge of the English language and international culture. They both meet the culinary genius, Philippe Lambert who dicusses philosophy with Nina, while Alan samples his hors d'oeuvres, including a vol-au-vent containing a bulls testicle, which Alan spat into a napkin after realising what it was. The next guest was Alain Perdrix, the French name for Alan Partridge. He was a HGV driver who had made deliveries to Britain several times. He was puzzled when Alan presented him with a tie and blazer badge combination pack and a painting of a bulldog with frogs legs. Then, the arts group known as Cirque des Clunes gave a vulgar performance depicting sexual intercourse and homicide. They then made Alan out to be flatulent before interrupting his introduction to the next guest repeatedly. Nina explained to them, in French that Alan was out of order.
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#6 - Never Say Alan Again
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 2 - Episode 4
Alan plans a "Bond-athon" for the bank holiday weekend with Michael, but the plans are jeopardized when Alan discovers that Michael has befriended a man who likes American things. Meanwhile, Lynn makes a visit to her mother's grave on the first anniversary of her death.
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#7 - Alan Wide Shut
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 2 - Episode 6
Alan's house is finally ready and Sonja is angling to cohabitate. Meanwhile, Alan's book is unsuccessful and is to be pulped. Alan can't stop the flashbacks of the painful days when he ate four Toblerones and drove to Dundee in bare feet.
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#8 - Episode 2
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 2
Alan met the new agony aunt for the soft porn magazine, Playboy. He found her very sexy until he realised that she was a man who had had a sex change. He then met the magician Tony LeMesmer who hypnotised him, making it known that he adored Ursula Andress and would love to have sex with her unless it meant stopping on the hard shoulder of a motorway despite not having a malfunction with his vehicle. Alan also met another Alan Partridge who had a facial tic and worked on a ferry. He also met the Hollywood couple, Tanya Beaumont and Gary Barker who denied their marriage was breaking up. Tanya then revealed that Gary was impotent and broke his sunglasses which were worn by James Dean the day he died. Alan was then strapped to a rotating wheel and had knives hurled at him by Tony LeMesmer.
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#10 - The Colour of Alan
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 2 - Episode 2
Alan is asked to present a sales conference for Dante's fireplaces of Reading, while Michael stays at the unfinished house after someone steals his front door.
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#11 - Villa Cimbrone, Ravello
The Trip - Season 2 - Episode 5
Steve and Rob visit Pompeii and then have lunch at Relais Blu on the Sorrento coast, overlooking the isle of Capri. They then visit their next restaurant, where Michael Buble is the talking point. Continuing their journey in the car they head towards the next hotel where Rob receives a call from his agent telling him that he has got the part in the movie he auditioned for. After visiting another restaurant and doing more impersonations, the two of them head back to their rooms and Rob calls his wife wanting to tell her about his news - but she's too busy to talk and he doesn't get a chance to let her know. Steve calls his son Joe, who says he wants to join him in Italy.
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#12 - Watership Alan
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 3
Just as he is ready to be the presenter of a boating promotional video, Alan manages to insult Norfolk's farmers on his radio show.
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#14 - Il Riccio, Capri
The Trip - Season 2 - Episode 6
Steve breaks the news to Rob that Joe is coming out to Italy - and it means that they will have to miss out Sicily. Rob is gutted but Steve says that Emma has organised a place for them to go on the island of Capri instead. Steve and Rob arrive at the cemetery where they are meeting Emma and Joe and all four of them get the ferry to Capri, where they arrive at another restaurant. During dinner, Joe reveals that Steve cried at the Mamma Mia film, prompting a Pierce Brosnan impression and setting Steve and Rob off on a round of further James Bond impressions. Rob reveals that he has got the part in the film he auditioned for. The next day, Rob and Emma go for a meal together while Steve and Joe go for a swim in the sea. Rob reveals to Emma that he slept with Lucy from the boat trip and asks for advice on whether he should go back to her. Following their swim, Steve tells Joe that he is going to buy a house closer to him - and that he is more than welcome to stay with him if he wants. The sun sets on Rob and Steve's journey as they both consider a different way of living.
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#15 - Episode 1
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 1
In this episode, Alan met the boring showjumper Sue Lewis who refused to jump on a horse on the hard studio floor. The horse then defecated on the floor. Alan then spoke to the brash new presenter of the programme ""This is Your Life,"" Keith Hunt. Alan claimed that Roger Moore would appear at the end of the show, but Keith doubted this. As it was Keith's son's birthday that weekend, he was on the show. Alan then presented the boy with tickets for him, his mother and her boyfriend to go to Disneyland which naturally annoyed Keith as he had access to his son that weekend. Then, the singer Shona McGough performed a number which started off sweet and cheerful. The song ended with her screaming "Bloodbath! Bloodbath!" and singing an account of a massacre taking place. Her and her backing band sat down on the sofa and the chairs, and ate pears. Alan then invited Keith, Sue and Shona into a special room where Roger Moore was supposed to appear, but spoke down a crackly phone line to Alan instead.
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#16 - North Norfolk Today with Eddie Shepherd and Terri Cohen
Mid Morning Matters with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 9
Alan fails to be nice to some young callers, and gets more than he bargained for when he chats to an ex-special forces soldier.
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#17 - Towering Alan
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 6
New developments at the BBC give Alan hope that he may be able to return to TV.
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#18 - A Room with an Alan
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 1
Divorced radio personality Alan Partridge lives in a travel tavern and presents the early-morning show on Radio Norwich. After viewing a five-bedroom house with his P.A., Lynne, Alan has a meeting with the BBC chief commissioner to determine if he is to be given a second series.
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#19 - Da Giovanni, San Fruttuoso
The Trip - Season 2 - Episode 2
Rob and Steve go on a boat trip, stopping off at the poet Shelley's house for a photo before continuing their journey and arriving at another restaurant. Rob goes for a walk on the beach with the woman running the excursion and asks how she ended up working on a boat in Italy, and confesses he is missing his young daughter.
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#20 - Alan Attraction
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 2
When Alan is told he must sack his entire staff to stay afloat, he diverts himself by spending the day with flirtatious receptionist Jill.
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#21 - Basic Alan
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 4
Since Alan is the only weekend guest at the hotel, the manager of the Linton Travel Tavern decides to close it for renovations.
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#22 - Who Does Alan Think Alan Is?
Mid Morning Matters with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 2
Alan welcomes Henry Spring to the studio - one of the genealogists from the BBC's 'Who Do You Think You Are' TV series - in an attempt to chart his Partridge family tree.
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#23 - Alan's Sad Story
Mid Morning Matters with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 5
Alan pledges to eat a different type of ethnic cuisine each day for a week - his way of celebrating the cultural diversity of Norwich. He also attempts to read out listeners' sad love stories, in an unwise nod perhaps to Simon Bates' 'Our Tune'.
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#24 - To Kill a Mocking Alan
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 5
Alan creates a Sunday-afternoon version of his radio show, inviting some executives from Irish TV to witness the production at the travel tavern.
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#25 - Wine
Mid Morning Matters with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 4
Alan invites listeners to call in to nominate which animal species they would make extinct, and how would they do it. He also has Rosie Whitter as a studio guest from the British Wine Marketing Board for a spot of wine-tasting.
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#26 - Simply the Best of Norfolk
Mid Morning Matters with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 3
Alan invites listeners to call in to nominate who they think is the greatest person Norfolk has ever produced and, later in the show, to play a game of 'Surname Mastermind'.
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#27 - La Suvera, Pievescola
The Trip - Season 2 - Episode 3
Steve and Rob visit Viareggio in Tuscany where Shelley's body was washed ashore, then have lunch at Trattoria Albana. Rob later gets a call from his agent saying that he needs to record himself on tape for a potential part in a film.
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#28 - Bravealan
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 2 - Episode 3
Alan makes a new friend at the BP garage, Dan, with whom he shares much in common. Dan asks Alan to present a prize at the Norfolk Bravery Awards, where Sonja is hopeful to try some of her practical jokes.
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#29 - Cockroaches
Saxondale - Season 1 - Episode 4
Tommy meets his daughter's new boyfriend and is determined not to come across as an authority figure. However, he changes his tune when he feels he isn't getting enough respect from his prospective son-in-law, and turns down an invitation to a party - a decision he soon has cause to regret.
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#30 - The Talented Mr. Alan
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 2 - Episode 1
Alan's back and life is on the upswing: he's got the third-best slot on Radio Norwich, a girlfriend and a Lexus. While at the garage, Alan meets a former teacher, who is persuaded to let Alan give a talk at school about how he has "bounced back".
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#31 - Focus on Cycling
Mid Morning Matters with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 1
Alan talks condiments with his listeners and welcomes Jim Jones to the studio to talk about his health campaign "On your bike".
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#33 - The Inn at Whitewell
The Trip - Season 1 - Episode 1
When Steve is commissioned by the food supplement of a Sunday newspaper to review half a dozen restaurants, he decides to mix work with pleasure and plans a trip around the north of England with his food loving American girlfriend. But when his girlfriend decides to leave him and return to the States, Steve is faced with a week of meals for one, not quite the trip he had in mind. Reluctantly, he calls Rob, the only person he can think of who will be available. Rob, never one to turn down a free lunch (let alone six) agrees, and together they set off for a culinary adventure. Over the course of six meals at six different restaurants in and around the Lake District, Lancashire and the Yorkshire Dales, this ultimate odd couple find themselves debating the big questions of life over a series of culinary delights. Their first stop is the Inn at Whitewell in the beautiful Trough of Bowland.
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#34 - Partridge on Partridge
Mid Morning Matters with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 7
There's tension in the studio because Sidekick Simon has been a guest on a rival show. Also in this episode, Alan eats an orange, an air rifle audio game, and Alan interviews himself.
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#35 - Tora Bora Alan
Mid Morning Matters with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 8
Alan co-hosts North Norfolk Digital's breakfast show.
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#36 - I Know What Alan Did Last Summer
I'm Alan Partridge - Season 2 - Episode 5
Alan is visited by Inland Revenue and is worried about a receipt for a Christmas gift. Meanwhile, he tries to convince Sonja that he is indeed friends with Bono.
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#37 - King and Car
Mid Morning Matters with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 6
Alan (and sidekick-Simon) preside over phone-ins for the Piper-Poll, and King and Car - the latter asking listeners what car they think their favourite monarch might drive. Finally, in desperation, they ask 'What is the Best Thing of All'.
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#38 - Episode 2
This Time with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 2
Alan and the team host a special show dedicated to the memory of a much-cherished broadcaster. With viewers in shock, it falls to Alan to handle this delicate situation as only he can. But one man’s loss is another’s opportunity…
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#41 - Episode 3
This Time with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 3
With exciting news on the show’s new presenting lineup, Alan and Jennie get their teeth into more of the pressing issues of the day: aggressive Scottishness, vegetarianism and a harrowing look at the abolition of corporal punishment.
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#43 - Il Cenobio dei Dogi, Camogli
The Trip - Season 2 - Episode 1
Rob Brydon and Steve Coogan are asked by The Observer to do another series of restaurant reviews. The pair have six meals in six different places on a road trip around Italy. They begin in Piemonte at the Trattoria Della Posta before stopping at Byron's house in Genova on their way to the Cenobio dei Dogi in Camogli. Steve is on hiatus from his American series and isn't drinking, while Rob is looking to unwind during his time away from his young family.
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#45 - Episode 6
This Time with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 6
Faced with some of the toughest challenges that live TV can throw at a man - rancour behind the scenes, a viewer in danger, a segment on ladies fashion - Alan calls on ‘Sidekick’ Simon Denton to step up to the plate. But will they sink or swim?
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#46 - Episode 1
This Time with Alan Partridge - Season 1 - Episode 1
Due to the sudden illness of its regular host, BBC One magazine show This Time welcomes Alan Partridge as its guest presenter. A chance for the consummate broadcaster to flit effortlessly between seal pups, hand washing and cyberterrorism.
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Saxondale - Season 2 - Episode 2
Tommy and Raymond go out shooting pigeons and save a man from committing suicide. However, as they try to change his outlook on life, Tommy believes something sinister is afoot, and his paranoia reaches a near-fatal conclusion in a karaoke club.
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Saxondale - Season 2 - Episode 1
Tommy tracks down an old friend, Malcolm "Rabies" Jessop (Simon Greenall) only to discover he now runs his own 'New Media' company and wears a suit. Tommy also revisits his past as a roadie by briefly stepping in to man the mixing desk of a Queen tribute band, only to discover that they too are far from the Rock'N'Roll spirit he used to know.
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#49 - Wasps
Saxondale - Season 1 - Episode 3
An old friend from Tommy's days as a roadie turns up. While he still clings desperately to his rock 'n' roll lifestyle Tommy is embarrassed to admit he has settled down. He soon finds himself dragged around some old haunts for a night out involving prostitutes and economy vodka.
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