The BEST episodes written by Jeff Stein
#1 - Landmark (3)
Barney Miller - Season 8 - Episode 22
Friends, foes and felons alike drop by to pay their last respects as the detectives prepare to leave for new assignments; Harris contemplates his resignation when he's assigned to Flushing Meadows; Barney recalls friends departed before he turns out the squad room lights for the last time.
Watch Now:Amazon
#2 - Chinatown (2)
Barney Miller - Season 8 - Episode 12
Unless he confesses soon, Harris and Dietrich's unwilling roommate may witness another murder. Meanwhile, harassment charges are pressed against Lieutenant Scanlon.
Watch Now:Amazon
#3 - The Slave
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 5
Harris bristles when he learns that the Burmese chauffeur being booked for a traffic accident is actually an indentured servant.
Watch Now:Amazon
#4 - The Inventor
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 21
The squad tries hypnosis to uncover the name of a felon that Wojo has forgotten; an inventor steals the plans for his own creation.
Watch Now:Amazon
#5 - Double Downer
The King of Queens - Season 4 - Episode 14
Doug and Deacon's planned office excursion is doubly disappointing when no one shows up except their irritating boss, and Kelly leaves Deacon moments before they're supposed to leave.
#6 - The Judge
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 9
A judge provides an attorney with the ultimate over-ruling; a gavel on the noggin; the crimes reported by a lonely woman emanate from daytime television soap operas.
Watch Now:Amazon
#7 - Vanished (1)
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 13
Vagrant Ray returns to report his fellow bums' disappearances; a woman wishes to have a child with a surrogate and is focusing in on Dietrich and Wojo.
Watch Now:Amazon
#8 - The Bird
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 7
Harris' book publication hits a snag when Dietrich refuses to sign a release; a suicide hot line operator becomes suicidal; the clerk that sold Wojo a sick bird changes his strict no-return policy when he learns that the detective is a cop.
#9 - The Desk
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 8
A former master criminal becomes a walking zombie following his lobotomy; a man is unable to use the telephone after being mugged because he's Amish. Jeff Corey, who appeared previously as "The Prisoner," was a renowned acting teacher.
#10 - The Child Stealers
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 15
A self-proclaimed time traveler tells Harris to fine tune his stock portfolio; Marty's divrorced gentleman friend Mr. Driscoll attempts to reclaim his son by abducting him from the playground.
#11 - Guns
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 16
Wojo fears that a despondent Luger is planning to do himself in; a man seeking to reclaim his television set robs the police vault; a rash of bizarre robberies leads to an eccentric gun collector.
#12 - Chinatown (1)
Barney Miller - Season 8 - Episode 11
A murder witness is uncooperative, so he, Harris and Dietrich are forced to share an apartment in seclusion until he talks; Lieutenant Scanlon falls for a wealthy mugging victim.
#13 - Riot
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 19
Luger takes a small disturbance with the Hassidic community and turns it into a full-scale riot; the squad discovers a survivalist couple setting up housekeeping in the sewers.
#14 - Fog
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 22
Barney is down in the dumps when he is passed over again for deputy inspector
#15 - All That Chazz
Ned and Stacey - Season 2 - Episode 20
Stacey and Ned are working on the final paperwork for the divorce and they're having a good time, playing silly physical games with each other just like lovers would. To delay the final signing, Ned tells Stacey he has an important date the next day. At the muffin shop, the dimwit Chazz asks Stacey to go out. She accepts. After a trip to the IMAX theatre where Chazz indulges in his usual moronics like falling out of his seat, Stacey is ready to call it a night. She grants him a goodnight kiss, though, and finds out that she likes it very much. In fact, the next day at the muffin shop, a breathless Stacey is telling an incredulous Amanda that Chazz is the greatest lover she could ever imagine. Ned confides to Eric that he's troubled by the feelings he now has for Stacey. Back home, Ned tries to recreate their good time of a couple of days before to stop Stacey from going back out with Chazz. It doesn't work, and Ned ridicules Chazz, asking if he's really the man she wants to spend her l
Watch Now:Amazon
#16 - The Psychic
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 11
An accused mugger claims that he was answering a psychic vision; a language professor takes vandalistic umbrage to a grammatically incorrect billboard.
#17 - Dietrich's Arrest (1)
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 18
A lottery winner dispenses of the prize money by tossing it out a window; Sgt. Dietrich is arrested for his off-duty participation at an anti-nuclear rally; Barney discovers he can't afford his condo-converted apartment.
#18 - Homicide (2)
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 2
Harris woos the precinct's crime photographer, while Dietrich tracks down the hit man's intended target; Barney's frustration boils over when the new homicide-only edict results in the death of an old friend.
#19 - Rachel
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 14
Ripner is suing Harris over the lawyer's portrayal in the detective's novel; Wojo asks Barney's daughter out on a date; a sporting-goods storeowner takes the law in his own hands.
#20 - Strip Joint
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 6
A bookstore owner is infuriated when a strip club opens near his place of business; and man is convinced that he is on the verge of spontaneous combustion.
#21 - People's Court
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 12
Weary of an uncooperative populace, a census taker goes to drastic measures to make a head count; beleaguered apartment dwellers band together and capture a burglar.
#22 - The Counterfeiter
Barney Miller - Season 5 - Episode 19
Harris milks a wily counterfeiter for his life story; a man takes exception to a plastic surgeon's work on his wife.
#23 - Liquidation
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 22
Harris is forced to liquidate his possessions to pay off his lawsuit.
#24 - Vanished (2)
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 14
Harris disappears while undercover as a vagrant; Luger elects to be demoted rather than to retire.
#25 - Vacation
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 3
A string of false alarms suggests that a sniper may be after a cop, but the detectives are preoccupied with Barney's posted vacation schedules and the case of a man who won't donate a kidney to his ailing brother.
#26 - Inquiry
Barney Miller - Season 8 - Episode 16
Internal Affairs is called in when a charge of excessive force is leveled against Wojo; an angry parent takes action when his child is declined admission into an exclusive kindergarten.
#27 - Movie (2)
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 10
A blind mugging victim and an overzealous charity collector are among the disparate audience members at the screening of Harris' overbudget film.
#28 - Dietrich's Arrest (2)
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 19
Harris gets the unenviable task of booking his colleague Dietrich, whose arrest prompts a visit from Internal Affairs; meanwhile, a nuclear engineer is brought in for dousing the participants with atomic water.
#29 - Homeless
Barney Miller - Season 8 - Episode 7
The 12th is overrun with homeless vagrants on Christmas; a greeting-card writer snaps; a cattle prod is the weapon of choice for a local merchant.
#30 - Resignation
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 7
Dietrich, stricken with guilt when he shoots a felon, tenders his resignation; a playwright assaults an incompetent actor.
#31 - Movie (1)
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 9
Harris is assigned to direct a pornographic movie; an old-time radio newsman assaults a vacuous television anchor.
#32 - Landmark (2)
Barney Miller - Season 8 - Episode 21
The 12th Precinct is sold; Dietrich arrests the head of a crime school; Luger tries to duck out on his mail-order bride.
#33 - The Architect
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 20
A disgruntled architect decides to improve on his building--by blowing it up.
#34 - Advancement
Barney Miller - Season 8 - Episode 2
Luger wants Barney to pen a letter for his mail-order bride; a lottery winner seeks revenge when the ticket seller loses his winning entry; Harris gets a new book deal.
#35 - The Rainmaker
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 21
The officers arrest a rainmaker, only discover that he was hired by the drought-ridden city; Wojo, Harris and Dietrich each consider a job opening in vice.
#36 - Call Girl
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 6
Dorsey takes a protective stance to a young prostitute; Harris is getting stock tips from another one; and Dietrich is tempted by all of them as he experiments with celibacy.
#37 - Homicide (1)
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 1
When the NYPD restructures its precincts as specialty squads, Luger pulls some strings and gets the 12th assigned as a homicide squad. Business is good; a man murders his barber, and a woman hires a hit man to kill her husband, and then changes her mind.
#38 - The Librarian
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 13
A serious tone pervades this episode about a gypsy and his harassment of the owner of a novelty store; on the lighter side, a librarian takes extreme measures to ensure quiet amongst the stacks.
#39 - Contempt (1)
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 15
A restaurant may have refused a man service because of his appearance; Barney won't name an informant so he's charged with contempt of court.
#40 - Contempt (2)
Barney Miller - Season 7 - Episode 16
When Barney spends the night in jail, the squad room is left in the natty hands of Sergeant Harris.
#41 - The Dentist
Barney Miller - Season 6 - Episode 11
One man's hands are a musical instrument to himself and a nuisance to others; a detective goes undercover to trap a dentist with wandering instruments.
#42 - Stranger in the Night
Mr. Belvedere - Season 1 - Episode 1
The ad that Marsha has placed seeking a housekeeper is answered by Mr. Belvedere who finds himself needing to adjust to suburban life as well as the Owens needing to adjust to having Mr. Belvedere around. Meanwhile, Wesley's hamster has gotten loose somewhere in the house, Heather's boyfriend is pressuring her into a more serious relationship, and Kevin brings home a bad report card.
#43 - The Outcasts
Mr. Belvedere - Season 1 - Episode 2
When Wesley and three other classmates are not invited to a fellow classmates party, Mr. Belvedere suggests that he throw a party of his own. However, during his party Wesley gets a belated invitation and walks out on his guests and then is ridden with guilt later. Meanwhile, Kevin prepares for a ski trip.
#44 - Gorgeous George
Mr. Belvedere - Season 1 - Episode 4
George takes Mr. Belvedere and Wesley to a wrestling match where a spectator, Max "Meat Grinder" Maxwell, picks a fight with George, which ends with Mr. Belvedere defending George. Dealing with a bruised ego, George becomes impotent and wanting to feel like a man, he buys a motorcycle. Meanwhile, taking a cue from Mr. Belvedere, Wesley begins to get in fights at school.
#45 - The Lost Weekend
Mr. Belvedere - Season 1 - Episode 6
When George and Marsha take a vacation to Florida, they leave Mr. Belvedere in charge of Kevin, a grounded Heather and Wesley. Immediately after they leave, events go out of control, when Heather sneaks out with her friends to see a Prince concert and Wesley brings a massage therapist over for a stressed-out Belvedere.
#46 - Tornado
Mr. Belvedere - Season 2 - Episode 2
A tornado watch adds to the tension between George and Mr. Belvedere after Belvedere takes it upon himself to edit a story George is writing. Things reach a head when a tornado forces everyone in the basement and a pool contest begins between George and Belvedere.
#47 - The Contract
Mr. Belvedere - Season 2 - Episode 6
On the night of his prom, Marsha has Kevin sign a contract promising that if he should drink, he should call home for a ride and George and Marsha would promise not hassle him. This leads Kevin to take the contract a bit too far and begins drinking all the time which is masking a deeper problem.
#48 - Pinball
Mr. Belvedere - Season 2 - Episode 10
George buys a pinball machine to recapture memories from his youth but quickly tires of it. However, Mr. Belvedere takes a liking to the machine and quickly becomes a pinball junkie and in the process begins to neglect his household duties. But when George sells the machine, Mr. Belvedere takes up a new residence, in the local arcade.
#49 - Speechless
Mr. Belvedere - Season 2 - Episode 12
When George learns that he is the winner of The Happy Guys of Pittsburgh Man of the Year Award he is thrilled. That is, until he learns he must give a speech, something he's terrified of doing. Meanwhile, a project in one of his classes has Kevin married to a nice girl but he's resistant to being seen with her in public.
#50 - Wesley's Friend
Mr. Belvedere - Season 2 - Episode 16
When one of Wesley's friends is revealed to have AIDS, he is taken out of school due to the ignorance and uncertainty that many of the other children's parents share. This leads Wesley to shun his friend in fear of getting the disease himself.