The BEST episodes written by Bill Burnett
#1 - FutureZone
ChalkZone - Season 1 - Episode 6
Penny and Rudy have to do a report on future inventions where they go into chalkzone. Then a robot, Craniac 3, sees Rudy drawing with the chalk, it tries to use the chalk, but fails (only humans can use the chalk). It takes rudy into the dome of the future, with all these useless and stupid inventions.
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#2 - Squirt The Daisies
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 20
Cow and Chicken play at the arcade. The Red Guy persuades Chicken to play his new video game. Chicken is placed in a special chair, and fitted with special goggles, and he finds himself, virtually in the video games. He then finds himself the victim of a bunch of killer daises.
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#3 - The Legend of SailCat
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 24
Flem's Dad takes Chicken, Flem, and Earl on a camping trip in the woods. Cow shows up with Chicken's forgotten hairbrush, only to be kicked out by him, Flem and Earl. Flem's Dad then sings a ballad to the kids about a flattened cat, who can act like a frisbee, and cut things down like trees and trucks. Later that night, the kids find their cans of Sugar Frosted Weenies cut open by Sailcat.
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#4 - Cow Loves Piles
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 22
Cow buys the new Piles the Beaver Doll, and takes him to the carnival with her. When he's catapaulted into the air, she then goes on a wild goose chase all over the carnival just to catch him.
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#5 - Time Machine
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 14
Cow and Chicken go to the arcade, and play the time machine. They find themselves back in a deserted time, where The Red Guy introduces them to the primortial soup. But when Cow accidentally drops her quarter into it, everyone in the present time has quarters for heads. Cow and Chicken must go back into time again to stop her.
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#6 - Cow and Chicken Reclining
Cow and Chicken - Season 2 - Episode 14
Dad is sick of his high-tech reecliner always malfunctioning, so he decides to dump it. Before he does, Cow and Chicken decide to see what it's like to sit in ""The Chair"". They, and they get stuck, and are taken away to museums, and in stolen vans, and finally back at home, where Dad waits for his ""new chair"".
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#7 - The Cow with Four Eyes
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 16
Cow has a new pair of glasses, and suddenly becomes the smartest person in school. Chicken decides that two can play at that game and gets glasses himself, but since he already has perfect vision, the glasses make everything look blurry. He soon becomes the new smartest kid in class. Because of his new intellect, he is placed in charge of tearing down the new ""dungeon"", which was really a new indoor swimming pool.
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#8 - The King and Queen of Cheese
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 26
Cow goes to Arkansas to meet The Red Guy, who is trying to become the King and Queen of Cheese. The problem is that his method of making cheese is sucking the cheese out of things such as buckets, water towers, weasels, haystacks, silos, grandmas, horses, dogs, lizards, hyenas, ducks, and now Cow. Chicken rescues Cow and the other animals, who then turn the cheese suckers to The Red Guy.
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#9 - Part-Time Job
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 4
Cow wants to earn money to buy the new Crabs the Warthog Doll. So she gets a part-time job at the milk farm, where her milk is superb. Chicken decides to get a part-time job too, and is refered to the Chicken farm as a ""temporary employee"". I Am Weasel: ""I.R. On Sun""
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#10 - The Laughing Puddle
Cow and Chicken - Season 2 - Episode 2
Chicken, Flem, and Earl play a game of kickball. Cow's udders kick the ball into the bushes, where Chicken, Flem and Earl discover a laughing puddle. After Flem and Chicken run back out, they forget the ball, and go back to discover that Earl is in the puddle. Chicken sends Flem after him, and he is stuck too. Chicken then gets Mom and Dad, who jump into the puddle, and Chicken drops Cow in there to save everyone. Chicken is then the only one left, until he discovers the puddle is a doorway to Boneless Chicken's nightclub.
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#11 - Who is Super Cow?
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 6
The Red Guy is sick of being foiled by Super Cow, so he opens up a laundrimat for super heroes, in hope to find out who she really is. It doesn't work, so he goes to Cow and Chicken's house, and kidnaps Cow. Chicken then goes to the rescue as Super Cow for her.
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#12 - Happy Meat
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 12
Chicken is sick of the cafeteria's food, which is nothing but a steady diet of ketchup. Since Chicken is against it, he has been banned from eating anything from the cafeteria. After a halusination of seeing his great grandpa and grandma, Cow and Chicken decide to open up their own little meat cafe, which turns out to be quite popular.
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#13 - The Molting Fairy
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 8
Chicken starts molting, and is convinced that he'll get a dollar for every feather by the molting fairy. Chicken adds it up to $700, and decides to start an I.O.U. system at the carnival.
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#14 - Fluffy the Anaconda
Cow and Chicken - Season 2 - Episode 1
Mom and Dad decide to let Cow have a pet. She choose an anaconda, after it eats Chicken, and she hears his voice from inside the snake, and assumes the snake can sound just like Chicken. Cow names the anaconda, Fluffy, and Fluffy soon grows attached to Chicken, as its full-coarse dinner.
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#15 - Ballerina Cow
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 18
Cow's dream is to be a great ballerina, but her weight makes her a big klutz, and everytime she dances, she destroys the house. She is the target of the eyes of recently de-wrecking ball home wrecker, Irving J. Slacksoff (The Red Guy). He makes Cow his new home wrecking act, and her ballerina skills cause her to destroy an entire building.
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#16 - The Ugliest Weenie
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 9
Cow writes a poetic play about a weenie, who is an outcast because he's not delicious looking as the other weenies. Chicken, Flem, and Earl think it's a crazy idea, but Mr. Fleur, the school's drama teacher decides to produce the play. Cow and Chicken's class get ready for the play, Flem has been cast as the Ugliest Weenie, a role was original given to Chicken. When Chicken sees that Flem get to play off the leading lady, Wee Wee, Chicken decides he wants Flem out of the way, so he can resume the part. But everytime he tries to get rid of Flem, he ends up hurting Mr. Fleur, until he's wheelchair-bound. The night of the play begins, and the cast and crew learn that Flem has been struck with chicken-pocks, so
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#17 - Alive!
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 5
Cousin, Boneless Chicken has been assigned to babysit Cow. She takes him outside to play catch, in which she throws him, and then catches him. At one moment, she tosses him too high, and he's stuck on the roof. After she goes after him, she accidentally knocks down the laddar, and is now stuck on the roof too.
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#18 - Headhunting in Oregon
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 25
Mom and Dad take Cow and Chicken on a vacation in Oregon to find ""head hunters"". The Red Guy is their tour guide, and takes them into the woods, where they find a tribe of headhunters. While Cow, Mom, and Dad are watching Ice Walkers, the tribe have their eyes fixed on Chicken's head.
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#19 - Boneless Kite
Cow and Chicken - Season 2 - Episode 12
Boneless Chicken teaches Cow and Chicken how to properly fly kites at Lava Park. When Cow's kite tangles with The Red Guy's Kite, he then uses Boneless as his new kite, and has a kite tug-of-war against the Asswipe tribe, over the hot-boiling-molten-lava river. Cow and Chicken come to Boneless's rescue, and the Asswipe tribe wins, while Red Guy takes a dip in the lava river.
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#20 - Pirate Lessons
Cow and Chicken - Season 2 - Episode 3
The Red Guy is now Captain Butz Pirate, and wants to give Cow and Chicken pirate lessons. He takes them aboard his pirate ship in the middle of the duck pond, and teaches them how to say ""argh"", carve peglegs, hold worms for ransom, and sink Flem and Earl's boat. But after that incident, Cow, Chicken, and their flag/man Jolly Roger declare mutiny.
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#21 - Cow's Instincts...Don't It?
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 17
Cow learns that she has a herding instinct, and soon starts to fit in with other crowds such as flocks of ducks, schools of fish, and the military. She soon learns that she is supposed to herd with other cows, so she does, but soon dislikes it when all the other cows do nothing but stand and eat grass.
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#22 - Orthodontic Police
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 15
Orthodontic Police: The Red Guy is an orthodontic police officer, whose duty is to correct those with bad teeth. He puts them into painful and rediculous-looking retainers that cover their whole bodies. He ultimately puts them on everybody, even those without teeth. When everyone learns that the braces are permanent, Super Cow comes to everyone's rescue.
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#23 - Halloween with Dead Ghost, Coast to Coast
Cow and Chicken - Season 2 - Episode 4
The Red Guy hosts a new late night talk show called ""Dead Ghost, Coast to Coast"", and reminds the viewers that tonight's Halloween. Chicken calls in, and is instructed to dress as a human being. So, Cow and Chicken go trick or treating as Mom and Dad, only to find that the neighbors assume that a grown man and woman are trick or treating. With that, Super Cow and Chicken teach The Red Guy a lesson.
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#24 - Buffalo Gals
Cow and Chicken - Season 2 - Episode 13
A group of female bikers break into Cow and Chicken's house, and start gnawing on their carpet. One of the bikers has a crush on Cow, and invites her to join the Buffalo Gals. It's up to Chicken to save his sister.
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#25 - Chicken's First Kiss
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 19
While playing a game of doll tag, Chicken is kissed by Winney. Everyone then tells Chicken that he has cooties, and that his beak will shrivel, his tongue will swell to 16 times, his butt will fall off, and his eyeballs will fall off. Chicken then has an anxiety attack, and imagines all the things others said. He then wakes up to find his parents tell him that he has to kiss Winney back, and marry her.
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#26 - Supermodel Cow
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 3
Cow wishes to be a famous supermodel, and gets her 15 minutes of fame, when The Red Guy discovers her. She soon appears in magazines and buildboards, but soon becomes yesterday's news.
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#27 - Space Cow
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 23
Space Cow: Cow and Chicken write essays on the jobs they'd like to have when they grow up. Cow wants to go into space, while Chicken wants to go into marketing. The winning essay's writer will get to have a day's worth of experience of their career choice. Cow wins, and she gets to help two astronaut fix the stuble microscope, while Chicken is runner-up, however instead of being actually marketing, he's a bagboy. The spaceship runs out of fuel, so Chicken goes into space to save Cow. The Legend of Sailcat: Flem's Dad takes Chicken, Flem, and Earl on a camping trip in the woods. Cow shows up with Chicken's forgotten hairbrush, only to be kicked out by him, Flem and Earl. Flem's Dad then sings a ballad to the kids about a flattened cat, who can act like a frisbee, and cut things down like trees and trucks. Later that night, the kids find their cans of Sugar Frosted Weenies cut open by Sailcat. I Am Weasel: ""Happy Baboon Holidays""
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#28 - Crash Dive
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 11
Crash Dive: Chicken build himself a wooden submarine, to use in the water. It's a pretty good submarine too, it comes with a parascope and everything. Cow launches it into the water for him, and he floats off, until he is sent down a waterfall. Super Cow goes to Chicken's rescue. Happy Meat: Chicken is sick of the cafeteria's food, which is nothing but a steady diet of ketchup. Since Chicken is against it, he has been banned from eating anything from the cafeteria. After a halusination of seeing his great grandpa and grandma, Cow and Chicken decide to open up their own little meat cafe, which turns out to be quite popular. I Am Weasel: ""Power of Odor""
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#29 - Which Came First
Cow and Chicken - Season 2 - Episode 11
The Red Guy sneaks a crow egg under Chicken's covers while he sleeps. The next morning, Cow and Chicken find the egg, and Chicken comes to the conclusion that he is actually a girl. So, it's egg sitting for Cow and Chicken, until the egg hatches and a baby crow comes out. Now Chicken comes to the conclusion that he isn't even a chicken.
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#30 - Confused
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 7
After Cow and Chicken get one measly little crumb on the floor, Mom and Dad send them to military school, where they become emotionless, hard-boiled soldiers. Mom and Dad then send them to sensitivy school, where they become girlies.
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#31 - School Bully
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 13
Chicken and Flem are the victim of Butch, the school bully. But Butch soon finds himself the victim of the new school bully, Jimmy, along with Chicken and Flem. Cow persuades Chicken and Flem to help Butch, and they soon find out that they were really wimps inside inflatable buff suits.
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#32 - Lawnmower Chicken
Cow and Chicken - Season 1 - Episode 21
Lawnmower Chicken: Chicken needs to earn money to buy socks, so he gets a job mowing The Red Guy's lawn, which has grass taller than him. He also has to mow the back yard, which contains the Swiss Alps! After Chicken finishes, The Red Guy cheats him, so Super Cow fixes it up.