The WORST episodes of Waiting for God
Every episode of Waiting for God ever, ranked from worst to best by thousands of votes from fans of the show. The worst episodes of Waiting for God!
When Tom Ballard moves to Bayview Retirement Vilage, he meets Diana Trent, a fiesty old woman who complains about everything and wants nothing more than just to die. Much to the dislike of Harvey Baines, the head of the home, the two form a friendship and eventually a romance, helping each other out of tight situations. Tom's son, Geoffrey, and daughter-in-law, Marion (whom Tom doesn't particularly like) are constantly stopping in and Jane, a worker at the home, is Diana's worst nightmare being constantly cheerful. Together, though, Tom and Diana make it together while they are waiting for God.
#1 - Daisy Takes Charge
Season 2 - Episode 3 - Aired 9/19/1991
Baines threatens Diana with expulsion unless she removes the partition but they both have more pressing matters to consider as Daisy becomes completely domineering, taking over the home with her ideas and threatening to get current staff sacked. Finally, Tom organizes a revolt against her, causing her to leave . . . and Diana to remove the partition.
#2 - Welcome to Bayview
Season 1 - Episode 1 - Aired 6/28/1990
Tom Ballard is put in Bayview retirement home by drunken daughter Marion and her weak husband Geoffrey. Many of the residents are very passive but not retired journalist Diana Trent, whose mission in life is to annoy 'the idiot Baines' - Harvey Baines, the home's manager. Initially she thinks Tom is rather dotty but when he tries to organize the residents into action against the home's poor food she knows she has found an ally.
#3 - Young People
Season 2 - Episode 9 - Aired 10/31/1991
A group of students comes to Bayview and Baines bribes Bob, one of them, into being seen in a compromising situation with Diana. This will enable him, under an old church covenant from the 1600's which was bestowed upon the home, to have her thrown out for immoral actions. As it happens Bob much prefers Marion and goes off with her instead.
#4 - The Seance
Season 4 - Episode 5 - Aired 10/7/1993
Whilst Mr. Kwok demonstrates karate to the Bayview males, who vie with each other to impress Jane, Tom is introduced to Jane's psychic, Marjorie Evans, and asks to be put in touch with his dead wife. A seance is duly organized, but Marion has bribed the medium to give a fake message, saying that Tom's wife disapproves of his relationship with Diana. Diana,however, exposes the plot.
#5 - Counselling for the Dying
Season 2 - Episode 1 - Aired 9/5/1991
Following the death,alone, of a resident, Tom puts himself forward as a counsellor to aid and comfort the terminally ill. A new female resident arrives and has afternoon delight with old Basil. Some time later Basil seems to be dying and Tom rushers to counsel him but he is merely suffering from exertion after sex with the lady. However, the lady dies and Tom organizes a splendid send-off for her.
#6 - Harvey's Fiancee
Season 3 - Episode 4 - Aired 10/1/1992
Baines meets a girl-friend, Lucy Maitland, at the hunt ball. His mother is coming to visit before going to stay with his sister so Jane poses as Lucy Maitland to put Mother off Harvey's new fiancee whilst Tom and Diana ham it up mercilessly pretending to be Baines' parents talking to Lucy. The result is that Lucy does not stay around and Jane has got her Baines back all to herself.
#7 - A Double Wedding?
Season 5 - Episode 8 - Aired 10/27/1994
After confiding her doubts about marriage to Sarah, Diana has a raucous hen night with male strippers whilst Tom's stag night is a very staid affair. The befuddled Dennis Sparrow is to conduct the two wedding ceremonies separately but due to a double booking involving a funeral, a double wedding is on the cards after all - despite Marion's efforts to sabotage Tom's marrying Diana. She need not have worried because, whilst Jane becomes Mrs. Harvey Baines, Tom and Diana happily agree not to marry after all but to live in sin.
#8 - A Royal Visit
Season 5 - Episode 3 - Aired 9/22/1994
A letter from the mayor's office suggests that a royal personage will be gracing Bayview with a visit. Diana, already even more crotchety than ever, due to a painfully swollen foot, does not share Tom's monarchist views and holds forth on the pointlessness of the royals. Just as predictably the royal visit turns out to be very much less 'royal' than expected.
#9 - Trouble with Men
Season 5 - Episode 5 - Aired 10/6/1994
Diana and Jane are both taken aback by the bizarre ways of men, following their respective marriage proposals. Tom's proposal to Diana has brought on a shock and she collapses and is taken to hospital. Jane's decision that she will become a nun after all has tempted Harvey to consider joining the priesthood.
#10 - The Psychiatrist
Season 1 - Episode 6 - Aired 8/2/1990
Baines decides that if Diana and Tom are seen to be mentally incompetent it will give him power of attorney over them and end all his troubles, particularly as the home is in financial difficulties. So he refers them to psychiatrist Dr.Darrow, for whom they act out a well-rehearsed pantomine of odd behaviour, leading the doctor to conclude that they are not mad, just a touch eccentric, with unexpected help coming from Sarah.
#11 - The Estate Agent
Season 3 - Episode 5 - Aired 10/8/1992
After she has been accused of selfishness, Diana goes to work as a volunteer at a charity for elderly people and takes up the cause of an old lady about to be evicted by unscrupulous estate agent Janet Follett. Diana learns that Ms. Follett is Baines' new girl-friend and she has plans for Bayview which will not go down well with the residents. With a little help from Tom and her media background Diana sets out to expose Ms. Follett.
#12 - Foreign Workers
Season 2 - Episode 8 - Aired 10/24/1991
In order to cut costs Baines decides to employ illegal immigrant workers at Bayview. To Diana one incompetent foreigner, the gardener, is enough and, after the residents have staged a protest, order is restored. Tom has been overdoing physical exercise in his efforts to get as fit as Linford Christie and his collapse leads Diana to persuade him to slow down.
#13 - The Thief
Season 2 - Episode 4 - Aired 9/26/1991
Resident Betty claims that her sewing basket has gone missing and Tom and Diana decide to investigate. Not fully believing Betty's story they follow her and Tom intervenes when they see her apparently shop-lifting. Tom is arrested and conducts his own court case, being found not guilty of theft, but guilty of contempt of court. Later, Diana recalls that she had the sewing basket all along, having borrowed it from Betty and forgetting she still had it.
#14 - The Partition
Season 2 - Episode 2 - Aired 9/12/1991
Tom is depressed because he is missing his late wife but Marion and Geoffrey are not keen to have him home on respite. He turns his attentions to Diana and suggests that they shack up together, a proposition that offends her so much that she has a partition built between their two rooms. Her mood is not helped by the arrival of new resident Daisy, who has a strong personality like herself and with whom she soon clashes, though Tom gets on well with her.
#15 - Looking for Work
Season 3 - Episode 3 - Aired 9/24/1992
It's April and yet it's still very cold so the residents do not appreciate it when Baines turns off the central heating and suggest the residents go jogging to keep warm. Tom and Diana decide to get jobs to get out of the icy-cold home. Tom gets a job working with Geoffrey, but he is such a pain that ,in order to get rid of him, Geoffrey pays Baines to put the heating back on.
#16 - Fraulein Mueller
Season 1 - Episode 5 - Aired 7/26/1990
Jane wants to become a nun so Baines sacks her and brings in stern German matron Greta Mueller, who is a tyrant and tells Sarah where Diana hid the Porsche. Tom cons Baines into making him the head of the Residents' Association and gets up a petition, which Baines thinks is to get rid of Diana, so he signs it. Actually it's to get rid of Greta, so he is forced to fire her and reinstate Jane.
#17 - The Funeral
Season 3 - Episode 1 - Aired 9/10/1992
Depressed vicar Dennis Sparrow is conducting the funeral of ex-Bayview resident Jimmy, but is making heavy weather of the eulogy and later he tells Tom and Diana that he is losing his faith. Geoffrey is back with Marion but their life is far from being a bed of roses and it's suggested Dennis tries to help them sort out their marriage. Not long afterwards Geoffrey announces that Marion and the vicar are now living together in Wales. Baines, meanwhile, is looking for a wife - a plan which involves Jane, though, sadly for her, not as a possible candidate, but as a helper.
#18 - The Boring Son
Season 2 - Episode 10 - Aired 11/7/1991
In addition to her alcoholism, Marion's fling with Bob becomes the last straw for Geoffrey, who finally decides to leave her. But where can he go? Answer, move in with his father at Bayview but Geoffrey is so boring that before long Diana and Tom are planning to get him back with Marion.
#19 - The Helicopter
Season 1 - Episode 7 - Aired 8/9/1990
With upcoming by-elections Councillor Ferguson is courting the grey vote and comes to the home. At the same time Diana, once a photo-journalist, takes Tom up in a helicopter to take aerial shots of local houses to sell to their owners. Among her shots is one of Ferguson and the Swedish nanny being very naughty on the lawn. This comes in very handy at scuppering Ferguson's plan to support a Japanese spare parts factory being built next to Bayview.
#20 - A Trip to Brighton
Season 1 - Episode 2 - Aired 7/5/1990
Diana rows with chief carer Jane for calling her a senior citizen and Tom does his best to ignore Marion and Geoffrey. Diana's niece Sarah has left her Porsche at the home so Diana drives Tom to Brighton in it. Harvey Baines reports it missing and the couple are stopped by the police but explain that Diana has her niece's permission to use it and Harvey is threatened with arrest for wasting police time.
#21 - Two Nasty Children
Season 3 - Episode 2 - Aired 9/17/1992
Blaming Tom for introducing Marion to Dennis Sparrow, Geoffrey asks him to baby-sit his two children Skye and Tarquin, but they are little monsters who run rings round them. Fortunately, Diana is on hand to put them in their place. Baines decides to try computer dating to find his wife but Jane decides to put her oar in.
#22 - The Promotional Video
Season 4 - Episode 6 - Aired 10/14/1993
A promotional video is being made to extol the virtues of Bayview and several residents are to have speaking parts, including Basil, who sees himself as the new James Bond, Tom and Jenny. The excitement is such that few will heed Diana's view that it is just another money-making scam by the idiot Baines - except Tom, who joins her in sabotaging the project by substituting footage of Marion and Geoffrey giving a rather more realistic look at life.
#23 - Politics
Season 3 - Episode 8 - Aired 10/29/1992
Diana decides that she would like to enter politics and stands as an independent candidate for the Residents' Party. Baines has been asked to stand for the Tories so Tom decides he will have some fun and join in the race too. Diana is forced to stand down when Baines threatens to sack care worker Jenny but Diana makes sure that this is used against him too and his political career is a non-starter.
#24 - Cheering Up Tom
Season 1 - Episode 3 - Aired 7/12/1990
Tom really thinks that he won't have to wait for God much longer when he says he is dying and is rushed to hospital. He is discovered to have had a heart attack but he becomes very depressed and talks about suicide,writing 'die on Thursday' in his diary. In order to talk him out of what she believes to be his plan to end it all Diana threatens to join him.
#25 - Living in Miserable Sin
Season 4 - Episode 3 - Aired 9/23/1993
Living together is not the bed of roses that Tom and Diana were expecting. He criticizes her sloppiness and her funny little ways, such as feeding acorns to squirrels with a sling-shot. She decides to move out and goes to stay with Sarah to be a nanny to baby Diana but this is not her forte. Tom misses her, especially when Geoffrey decides to move in with him again.