The BEST episodes of Crossing Swords season 2
Every episode of Crossing Swords season 2, ranked from best to worst by thousands of votes from fans of the show. The best episodes of Crossing Swords season 2!
Goodhearted hero wannabe Patrick lands his dream job as a squire, only to learn the royal castle is a corrupt hornet’s nest of horny monarchs, crooks and charlatans. War, murder, full frontal nudity—who knew brightly colored peg people led such exciting lives?
#1 - Hard Day’s Knight
Season 2 - Episode 10 - Aired 12/10/2021
After months of the kingdom depleting the jewel mines underground, the Mole People finally lash out at the surface-dwellers who have ruined their home. With the royal family in danger, Patrick must journey down into the darkness, where he encounters terror both real and existential; does he even want to be a knight anymore? When Patrick is double-crossed by allies, his world truly comes crashing down around him, and his life will never be the same.
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#2 - Sad-iator
Season 2 - Episode 8 - Aired 12/10/2021
As punishment for his refusal to turn in King Merriman, Patrick finds himself sentenced to fight in the arena as a gladiator. Merriman starts to take a shine to his new life in the human resources department of a cobbler shop. But when he learns of Patrick’s fate, Merriman puts corporate life aside and attempts to reclaim his throne.
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#3 - Tent Pitching
Season 2 - Episode 6 - Aired 12/10/2021
The circus returns to the kingdom, much to the king’s delight. Blarney is reunited with his uppity clown college classmates. Patrick, however, is concerned that Danielle’s circus origins make this an opportune time for her to strike again.
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#4 - Nothin, Usurp With U?
Season 2 - Episode 7 - Aired 12/10/2021
The kingdom adjusts to life under its new (old) king, the Old King, who is back on the throne thanks to Danielle’s machinations. Patrick is torn between loyalty to the kingdom and loyalty to his former king, Merriman. Meanwhile, Merriman tries life as a civilian and quickly finds a new career after a mushroom-fueled drug trip.
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#5 - Get Your Minchachas Out
Season 2 - Episode 5 - Aired 12/10/2021
On an island training retreat, Patrick and the squires meet the most famous knight in the kingdom, but Patrick quickly decides the knight’s lessons are superficial crap. Elsewhere on the island, Merriman and Tulip attend couples counseling that quickly turns into a struggle for their very lives.
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#6 - Knight of the F**king Dead
Season 2 - Episode 9 - Aired 12/10/2021
Merriman and Tulip are back on the throne, just in time for the annual Hallowtide party. Patrick is tasked with chaperoning Princess Blossom, but his desire to hang out with the knights at the party leads him to abandon his duties. Meanwhile, Blossom plays a “Bloody Mary” game in a mirror, and swaps places with her deceased Aunt Donna, who runs amok at the party. Now Patrick must help Blossom escape the mirror by midnight, or she’ll be trapped there forever!
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#7 - Destination: Wedding
Season 2 - Episode 3 - Aired 12/10/2021
The wedding of the year brings Merriman a chance to mend fences with King Rami IV, whose son is arranged to marry Holden the squire. But when Ruben crashes the wedding in order to win Holden back, Patrick uncovers a malevolent undercurrent to the nuptials.
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#8 - Good Vibrations
Season 2 - Episode 4 - Aired 12/10/2021
When Queen Tulip slips into a sex-toy-induced coma, King Merriman throws a beauty pageant to replace her. Patrick feels guilty because he recruited the sex toy’s inventor. While every eligible lady in town tries to win the king’s hand, Patrick desperately attempts to wake the queen before the kingdom is torn apart.
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#9 - Toxic Femininity
Season 2 - Episode 2 - Aired 12/10/2021
A drug epidemic at Blossom’s all-girls academy threatens to derail the king and queen’s scheme to draw attention to their newfound wealth. Patrick and Broth go undercover as female students to protect Blossom and bust the drug ring, but they find that the truth behind this mystery is even more shocking than they suspected.
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#10 - Shamrock Shakedown
Season 2 - Episode 1 - Aired 12/10/2021
Patrick finds himself on trial for betraying the kingdom, and only avoids punishment with a Hail Mary promise to the king: that he will find the legendary leprechaun gold. Patrick is thrilled when he enlists a real, honest-to-god knight to help him in his quest, until he realizes Sir Kutter is a wild card who plays by his own rules.
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