The Best Episodes Directed by Dominic Brigstocke
#1 - Episode 6
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 6
In this series finale, Alan dances with the Alan Partridge playmates- a group of women wearing skirts, blazers and Alan Partridge masks. He then meets the child actors, Scott and Dean McLean. They are unimpressed by his gifts of a toy car and a mask and his confusement of the term CD-ROM with the name Seedy Ron. He then speaks to the two lesbians who are due to host the show for gays and lesbians to take the slot KMKYWAP was in. He comes up with numerous names for Wanda Harvey and Bridey McMahon before they come up with anagrams. Alan is displeased to find that porn legend is an anagram of Glen Ponder, whereas anal dirgeprat is one of Alan Partridge. Then, the crap comedian Joe Beasley tells some awful jokes with a small monkey puppet. Alan then meets the restaurant critic for the Spectator, Forbes McAllister. Forbes bought a load of Byron memorabilia in an auction because Michael Winner was bidding for it.
#2 - Episode 5
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 5
On this show, Alan was forced to reinstate Glen Ponder after legal action was threatened; he irritated the boxing promoter, Terry Norton, by constantly referring to an incident which involved Terry, during which a man was murdered; he then met the widow and son of another Alan Partridge, whom he presented with a gravestone with the wrong date of birth on it. Terry and the relatives of the dead man were then invited to judge the Miss. Norwich beauty contest, which was fixed so that a girl Alan liked won. After that, a political debate was held discussing the by-election that was due to take place when a sitting MP, Sir Morris Christopher [a nod to Chris Morris] died after choking on scampi. A man from a stupid party, the Bald Brummies against the big footed conspiracy party caused chaos in the studio after he repeatedly interrupted the fellow candidates, causing the Tory candidate to brand him "a bloody shit" and violently attack him.
#3 - Episode 3
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 3
In this edition, Alan sang a duet with the American singing sensation, Gina Langland. She grossly annoyed him by thinking his name was Alec. He then met the celebrity publicist Laurence Noels. He had just released a book showing photographs of the Royal Family participating in recreational activities. Alan had got video footage of Laurence parking across a disabled parking space, eating mucus from his nose and visiting a dermatologist. Laurence's dermatologist, Clive brought the amount of hair removed from Laurence's back in an average session claiming it was enough to cover twelve young children. Then, Alan met three old women who were athletes in the 1936 Berlin olympic relay race. They slowly walked around a sixth scale reproduction of the stadium in the studio. Alan then got naked and sat in a jacuzzi, eagerly awaiting the dance group, Hot Pants. He was much less eager when they ran into the studio- they were men. They stripped down to their underpants and handcuffed themselves to him.
#4 - Episode 4
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 4
In this episode, supposedly from Paris, Alan is given a French co-host, Nina Varnier who annoys Alan with her knowledge of the English language and international culture. They both meet the culinary genius, Philippe Lambert who dicusses philosophy with Nina, while Alan samples his hors d'oeuvres, including a vol-au-vent containing a bulls testicle, which Alan spat into a napkin after realising what it was. The next guest was Alain Perdrix, the French name for Alan Partridge. He was a HGV driver who had made deliveries to Britain several times. He was puzzled when Alan presented him with a tie and blazer badge combination pack and a painting of a bulldog with frogs legs. Then, the arts group known as Cirque des Clunes gave a vulgar performance depicting sexual intercourse and homicide. They then made Alan out to be flatulent before interrupting his introduction to the next guest repeatedly. Nina explained to them, in French that Alan was out of order.
#5 - Episode 2
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 2
Alan met the new agony aunt for the soft porn magazine, Playboy. He found her very sexy until he realised that she was a man who had had a sex change. He then met the magician Tony LeMesmer who hypnotised him, making it known that he adored Ursula Andress and would love to have sex with her unless it meant stopping on the hard shoulder of a motorway despite not having a malfunction with his vehicle. Alan also met another Alan Partridge who had a facial tic and worked on a ferry. He also met the Hollywood couple, Tanya Beaumont and Gary Barker who denied their marriage was breaking up. Tanya then revealed that Gary was impotent and broke his sunglasses which were worn by James Dean the day he died. Alan was then strapped to a rotating wheel and had knives hurled at him by Tony LeMesmer.
#7 - Episode 2
The Armstrong and Miller Show Season 2 - Episode 2
The two street-talking chav pilots are back discussing their self-esteem issues and a recent letter from home; Dennis Lincoln-Park, an accident-prone culture buff, examines an absolutely priceless Rembrandt drawing a little too close with his magnifying glass. Contestants on a new series The Critical Factor are pushed to their very limits; Jilted Jim makes some new friends in Hawaii, despite his wife not being there - she ran off with the wedding DJ; Dr Tia continues saving lives and marveling at the dignity of "these people" in Botswana. A reasonable boss interrupts his employee's terrorist interrogation with an invitation to Pizza Express for a birthday treat; Divorced Dad is back with his teenage son, with graphic details of his sex life with his new girlfriend. And when a rather suave guy buys a drink for a beautiful woman at a bar, the evening deteriorates dramatically when she catches sight of his pony-tail. And there's more...
#8 - Episode 6
The Armstrong and Miller Show Season 2 - Episode 6
Dr Tia in Botswana reveals he isn't looking to change the culture of a continent, but just wants to earn the people's reverence. We also discover the origins of job interviews when a new caveman wants to join the tribe; the Second World War pilots eye up two 'buff' women in uniform; Dr Dennis Lincoln-Park is in the Dutch university town of Leighton with a rare and precious tulip; Weird Howard joins in on stag-do stories and relays a practical joke he played on a friend involving potassium hydrochloride from a Russian website; and Jilted Jim pops up from the bottom of the Jacuzzi, where he's been for four minutes trying to starve his brain of oxygen in a desperate attempt to forget the memory of his wife's fling. A group of workers are also about to tap into the terrorist Firewall when their boss comes up with a solution and introduces a masseur for "wellness in the workplace".
#9 - Episode 1
Knowing Me, Knowing You with Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 1
In this episode, Alan met the boring showjumper Sue Lewis who refused to jump on a horse on the hard studio floor. The horse then defecated on the floor. Alan then spoke to the brash new presenter of the programme ""This is Your Life,"" Keith Hunt. Alan claimed that Roger Moore would appear at the end of the show, but Keith doubted this. As it was Keith's son's birthday that weekend, he was on the show. Alan then presented the boy with tickets for him, his mother and her boyfriend to go to Disneyland which naturally annoyed Keith as he had access to his son that weekend. Then, the singer Shona McGough performed a number which started off sweet and cheerful. The song ended with her screaming "Bloodbath! Bloodbath!" and singing an account of a massacre taking place. Her and her backing band sat down on the sofa and the chairs, and ate pears. Alan then invited Keith, Sue and Shona into a special room where Roger Moore was supposed to appear, but spoke down a crackly phone line to Alan instead.
#10 - Watership Alan
I'm Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 3
Just as he is ready to be the presenter of a boating promotional video, Alan manages to insult Norfolk's farmers on his radio show.
#11 - A Room with an Alan
I'm Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 1
Divorced radio personality Alan Partridge lives in a travel tavern and presents the early-morning show on Radio Norwich. After viewing a five-bedroom house with his P.A., Lynne, Alan has a meeting with the BBC chief commissioner to determine if he is to be given a second series.
#12 - Alan Attraction
I'm Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 2
When Alan is told he must sack his entire staff to stay afloat, he diverts himself by spending the day with trashy secretary Jill.
#13 - Towering Alan
I'm Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 6
New developments at the BBC give Alan hope that he may be able to return to TV.
#14 - Basic Alan
I'm Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 4
Since Alan is the only weekend guest at the hotel, the manager of the Linton Travel Tavern decides to close it for renovations.
#15 - Episode 2
The Armstrong and Miller Show Season 1 - Episode 2
Divorced dad and his young son bond over a cup of tea, and the conversation turns to frank discussions about why Granny died - possibly something to do with an imperial gallon of Tia Maria. And there's more...
#16 - To Kill a Mocking Alan
I'm Alan Partridge Season 1 - Episode 5
Alan creates a Sunday-afternoon version of his radio show, inviting some executives from Irish TV to witness the production at the travel tavern.
#17 - Episode 3
The Armstrong and Miller Show Season 2 - Episode 3
Howard The Weirdo takes things one step too far in a team ice-breaking session. Meanwhile, the Second World War pilots are vexed that people have been talking about them behind their backs; Dennis Lincoln-Park examines the only surviving panel of a rare tapestry; and the divorced dad offers his teenage son tips on avoiding STDs. Terry Devlin, the Ulsterman Royal Correspondent, talks assuredly about the minutiae of the Royal Family's lives; Jilted Jim invites his new best friends to a game of "Travel Boggle"; and, when a woman picks out a "South Harbour Club Patrol" branded T-shirt for her boyfriend, he's bewildered to find himself roped into dealing with approaching Somali pirates.
#18 - Episode 8
Green Wing Season 2 - Episode 8
Demented dwarf killers Joanna and Dr Statham are amazed that they seem to have got away with their hideous crime so consider themselves above the law. Caroline gets no fewer than three proposals. Sue gives birth to an infant with a mane just as impressive as Mac's.
#19 - Episode 1
Green Wing Season 2 - Episode 1
It's eight weeks since Guy stole the ambulance and drove to a literal cliffhanger ending with Mac and Martin in tow. Mac is now in a coma and is receiving a constant stream of admiring visitors while Guy is not coping too well with the fact that he's slept with his mother. She's not having a great time of it either with her office staff's constant ribbing. However, Martin is happy to have a new brother and he's now gone as far as kissing Karen's tongue!
#20 - Lodgers
Green Wing Season 1 - Episode 3
Worried about her age Joanna is also concerned about the dreariness of her relationship with Statham, who in turn tries to spice up their relationship through spontaneity (with the help of playing his recorder to get himself sexually aroused). However he soon becomes concerned that I.T. wiz and women-pleaser Lyndon Jones is trying to steal Joanna away from him. Meanwhile Mac discovers that despite protesting she never wanted children, his ex-girlfriend Holly is expecting with her new partner. A delighted Guy soon uses this as ammunition in his game of one-upmanship with Mac, but ends up being traumatized himself when memories of his boarding school days come back to haunt him. And Caroline juggles her nicotine urges with searching for a new roommate, but is less than thrilled with the candidate being Angela.
#21 - Episode 1
The Armstrong and Miller Show Season 2 - Episode 1
The chav pilots are saved from a firing squad by Biffy's mother who tells them not to sh*t her about; Cheery children's TV presenters make an apology to their viewers after drinking on a night out made them act in a "silly way"; The White Devil, a self-important ex-pat in Africa, roams the back roads and sets the record straight. Medical Genius? No. Miracle Worker? Sometimes. Lunatic? Now we're getting close. Things get rather confusing when actors suffer accidents while reconstructing an accident - where there's blame there's a claim; Dennis Lincoln-Park visits a library to hold an ancient, priceless manuscript, with disastrous consequences. We learn about the origins of hairdressing from Neanderthals; Brabbins and Fyffe, the filthy alter-egos of Flanders and Swann, sing a jolly little song about women. A first date starts to go wrong when stalker-like tendencies come to the surface; and a bored teacher performs some special moves at the back of the school gym while the children work on, oblivious. And there's more...
#22 - Episode 6
The Armstrong and Miller Show Season 1 - Episode 6
Rog finds his best friend and wife naked together in the back of his car - but still doesn't suspect anything; three marketing executives are stranded on an island and brainstorm a suitable SOS message; and a sketch involving inadequate army boots.
#23 - Rumours
Green Wing Season 1 - Episode 2
While Joanna is extra careful to make sure that her and Statham aren't seen arriving together, Caroline isn't quite so lucky when she is spotted turning up with Guy after having spent that night at his place. Despite Caroline assuring everyone nothing happened between them, Guy is happier to play up to the rumours spreading around the hospital until Caroline forces him to admit the truth by digging up some dirt to blackmail him with. Meanwhile Martin is on the hunt for his missing soya yoghurt after it has been moved by the cleaners, Mac discovers that his old girlfriend is getting married, Statham spends the day enjoying how his white coat swirls around him, Sue tries to get her hands on Mac's hair and Harriet loses one of her many children.
#24 - Episode 5
The Armstrong and Miller Show Season 2 - Episode 5
Two men in white robes sweeping the floor just need to double-check that severing all connections with family and selling all assets doesn't mean that they're part of some kind of cult. The Second World War pilots question whether being forced to eat powdered egg is actually abuse. And, when a middle-aged raver is recognised by the DJ as Mr Wilkinson from work, he begins to regret popping those extra pills. When a man is offered a lettuce upgrade on his laptop, it's too good an offer to refuse - until he spots the latest carrot upgrade. As undercover spies psych themselves up to burst out of the van and free hostages, they realise that their reasonable boss has diverted the van to Bowl-la-rama in Watford for some team motivation. And, when Dennis Lincoln Park finds himself 60ft below the streets of London to uncover a perfectly preserved Roman mural, his discovery soon comes to an abrupt end.
#25 - Caroline's First Day
Green Wing Season 1 - Episode 1
After being locked out of her new house all night, Dr. Caroline Todd is forced to turn up to her new job at the local hospital tired and smelling like a mini-cab after using car freshener as a replacement for deodorant. She soon meets the strange staff, but anaesthetist Dr. Guy Secretan is very welcoming and offers her his spare room for the night while he works a night shift. However after a blocked toilet incident, she soon realises Guy's true motives after he turns up home early and she discovers there isn't actually a spare room. Meanwhile Dr. Alan Statham is having troubles of his own after someone defaced his badge by blacking out the letters O,N,S,L,T and A from his Consultant name badge, and his secret lover, Head of Human Resources Joanne Clore, tells him he isn't particularly well endowed â€“ prompting him to check a corpse for comparisons sake. Someone else having women problems is junior doctor, Martin Dear, who unsuccessfully tries to get dating advice from Guy. However rati
#26 - Emergency
Green Wing Season 1 - Episode 9
It's Mac's last day and Sue and Caroline are struggling to cope with the thought of losing him. While Sue offers to kill in order to keep Mac in the hospital, Caroline spends most of the day trying to find fault with Sheffield in order to deter him from leaving. Meanwhile Martin finds himself in a tricky situation when he reads a personal letter of Guy's and discovers that not only is Guy adopted, but that his real mother was called Joanna Peerson, the surname of whom also happened to be the maiden name of Joanna Clore. Unaware that his mother and work colleague are one of the same, Guy has no qualms in taking up one of Mac's bets to prove his prowess with the ladies by bedding an older woman of Mac's choice, Joanna. When Martin later discovers his half-brother's intentions he rushes over to stop it, which ends in a botox stabbing, staff on the run from the police in an ambulance and a major cliff-hanger, literally.
#27 - Episode 3
Green Wing Season 2 - Episode 3
A documentary crew visits the hospital, exciting the creative juices in Alan and the bitter rivalry between Sue and Joanna. Meanwhile, a tape of Guy being "intimate" with his mother is now in the possession of Sue who plays merry havoc with his and Joanna's life. And is this the end for Angela as she falls for the charms of the director who's off to Toronto next week?
#28 - Joanna's Birthday
Green Wing Season 1 - Episode 4
Joanna is turning 42, but her day brightens up when she mistakenly thinks she has received a locket as a birthday gift from Lyndon, when it is in fact from the ever doting Dr. Alan Statham (filled with his own "love juice"). Meanwhile Guy is compiling a fanciability league table of all the female staff, the results of which don't go over too well with Dr. Caroline Todd who retaliates with her own ungenerous male staff summary (but Guy is still happy to be the aggregate total winner). Elsewhere Boyce and Martin use the CT scanner to weed out the money prizes in packets of crisps, the former of whom also spends as much time as he can taunting Dr. Statham about his gay tendencies. And Caroline tries to adapt to living with Angela's active sex life and harp playing.
#29 - Episode 4
Green Wing Season 2 - Episode 4
Guy's got problems, he's looking for a place to stay while fulfilling his community service. Martin is in need of some cash so acts as a life model at an art class attended by the soon-to-be-gobsmacked Sue. Statham is distraught at his parking space while Joanna might need glasses. Mac and Caroline's relationship is hotting up but could all that change as his ex-girlfriend joins the staff?
#30 - Episode 6
Green Wing Season 2 - Episode 6
Mac adjusts to his new rôle as a father while Caroline tries to make him jealous with Guy. Statham is rather pleased with himself for winning his radiologist's community weekly caption competition which does not please Joanna. She employs her vertically-challenged cousin to scare him but a trip to the incinerator is soon required. Martin pesters Joanna for knowledge of his dad and hires a detective to find him.
#31 - Episode 5
Green Wing Season 2 - Episode 5
Dr. Statham enters politics but requires a voice coach and the use of a car with two loudhailers! Martin inadvertently becomes a pimp. Mac and Caroline get a little closer but Holly sticks her oar in with a little ginger surprise for Mac. Harriet and Lyndon manage to have a date despite Joanna's best attempts to sidetrack her with work. Guy is not exactly the best flatmate but is he there at the right time for Caroline?
#32 - Tests
Green Wing Season 1 - Episode 6
Hungover and worse for wear, Caroline is feeling the effects of the party the night before, which she still can't completely remember. When her kissing exploits come back to her, she is forced to trawl the hospital to apologise to everyone she kissed and insist it meant nothing â€“ even to Mac, who of course it meant everything with. Meanwhile both Harriet and Joanna think that they are pregnant and are soon taking trips to the path lab. While Statham is ecstatic at the prospect of becoming a father, Joanna is far from thrilled with the positive result â€“ until it turns out the results were mixed up with Harriet â€“ leaving Harriet the depressed one and ending with Joanna breaking up with Statham. Elsewhere in the hospital Mac secretly has an interview for a better job, while Martin continues his quest to further his own career by taking his doctor's exam yet again.
#34 - Episode 3
The Armstrong and Miller Show Season 1 - Episode 3
Breakfast News takes more viewer emails; Divorced Dad explains to his son why no one wants to be friends with him; Rog finds his wife on top of Peter (turns out he has a bad back!) and asks Peter about a pregnancy test; and the half-price pots scandal is revealed.
#35 - Episode 4
The Armstrong and Miller Show Season 1 - Episode 4
The fighter pilots are captured by the Germans; a mounted police officer is teased by his squad car pals; we get to look in on a rubbish sci-fi show with un-impressive character and location names; and Rog comes home to surprise his wife on their anniversary, only to find Peter already there.
#36 - Tangled Webs
Green Wing Season 1 - Episode 7
Statham still isn't completely over Joanna and spends all his day trying to win her back by pretending to hang himself, singing â€˜All By Myself' to her via a megaphone and by challenging Lyndon to a tug-of-war in the cafeteria for the hand of Joanna. However when he meets the hospital's chaplain Cordelia he soon finds another object for his affection. Meanwhile Caroline is feeling broody but is having conflicting thoughts about who should be the prospective daddy. Still infatuated with Mac, she also finds herself drawn to Guy and his â€˜layers' - most of which he invents in order to manipulate her into a date out in the countryside. Martin gets his exam results (which are held hostage by Sue for most of the day) but discovers he has failed yet again â€“ however not until Guy evilly convinces him he has passed. And a cardboard cut-out of Jesus keeps popping up around the hospital.
#37 - Housewarming Party
Green Wing Season 1 - Episode 5
Hormones are abound in the hospital with Mac the centre of both Caroline and Sue's affections, Boyce and Kim having fun together and Karen writing a love poem about Martin who in turn is desperate to impress Caroline. And of course there is Joanna (sporting a new bleached hairdo) who is still after Lyndon much to Statham's annoyance, and so after listening to Boyce's advice on women, decides to act mysterious by playing 'kidnapper' and having his way with Joanna in the woods. Meanwhile Caroline and Angela decide to throw a party and the hospital staff are invited including an apprehensive Martin who can't decide on what to wear. After turning down Sue's selection of clothes from the dead people box', the Staff Liaison Officer takes him shopping for the perfect outfit with interesting results. At the party the free flowing alcohol is soon evident, most obvious in the form of Caroline who makes out with the majority of the party, including a 'sicky' kiss with Mac after he helps her.
#40 - Episode 4
The Armstrong and Miller Show Season 2 - Episode 4
Sketches in this episode include the busy CEO learning from his assistants that lions can't swim and there's actually no pepper in Dr Pepper; the origins of the dinner party are revealed as Neanderthals sit down to a spot of mammoth and mugs of blood; the Second World War pilots aren't pleased to be roped into digging the escape tunnel - the dirt is bad for their asthma and definitely against health and safety; Jilted Jim continues to cause havoc in Hawaii by letting slip that Phil said men cheating was inevitable; and an undercover operation is ruined when a reasonable boss turns up to tell his employees that working past 5pm isn't acceptable and to get themselves home.
#41 - Slave Auction
Green Wing Season 1 - Episode 8
The hospital is hosting a charity Grand Slave Auction with Statham, Caroline, Guy and Lyndon all up for bid and while there is high competition for some, others aren't so lucky. Meanwhile Caroline falls on Sue's bad (and murderous) side when she admits to having feelings for Mac, but Mac surprises them all by revealing his new girlfriend Lady Emily and by the announcement that he his leaving the hospital after being offered a consultancy position in Sheffield. Martin decides that the way to win Caroline's heart is by being a bastard, Joanna finally finds out where she stands with Lyndon and Harriet is called into the school to talk about her troublesome son.
#42 - Episode 2
Green Wing Season 2 - Episode 2
Statham, when not drawing breasts upon his x-rays, is trying to make Joanna jealous with increasingly desperate pretend sexual exploits. Mac is back at work and, with no help from Guy, is causing Caroline grief as he can't remember the twenty minutes that they were an item. Meanwhile, Karen and Martin have moved on to the next level and she's wearing him out.