The BEST episodes written by Mark Roberts (X)
#1 - Camel Filters + Pheromones
Two and a Half Men - Season 1 - Episode 12
When Berta is forced to bring her granddaughter Prudence to work with her, the boys find themselves a little preoccupied with her.
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#2 - If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake
Two and a Half Men - Season 1 - Episode 7
Judith gets worried when, for a school assignment, Jake draws the tattooed buttocks of a female surfer friend of Charlie's who is in the habit of walking around his place half naked. Then Alan gets worried about Judith after she becomes friends with the surfer girl.
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#3 - An Old Flame With a New Wick
Two and a Half Men - Season 1 - Episode 18
Charlie is stunned to learn his ex-girlfriend is now a man (Chris O'Donnell).
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#4 - It Was 'Mame', Mom
Two and a Half Men - Season 2 - Episode 18
Charlie is invited to a party hosted by a gay ad-executive named Eric, so Charlie asks Alan to pretend that he's his life partner. While at the party, Charlie meets Eric's ex-wife Pamela, and tries to sleep with her without Eric finding out.
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#5 - Hi, Mr. Horned One
Two and a Half Men - Season 3 - Episode 6
Ignoring Alan's warnings, Charlie continues to date Isabella until she threatens to put a curse on his manhood.
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#6 - Tight's Good
Two and a Half Men - Season 5 - Episode 9
Charlie fights his attraction for Teddy's daughter.
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#7 - A Bag Full of Jawea
Two and a Half Men - Season 2 - Episode 3
Charlie tries to save Jake from school suspension for giving his teacher (Missi Pyle) the finger by romancing her, but his several attempts fail every time.
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#8 - A Lungful of Alan
Two and a Half Men - Season 2 - Episode 12
Alan is jealous of Charlie when an old classmate, who's now a beautiful woman, seems to be more interested in Charlie.
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#9 - We Called It Mr. Pinky
Two and a Half Men - Season 3 - Episode 5
Charlie learns he can't be in a long-lasting relationship, because of unresolved issues he has with his mother. Jake asks Charlie for advice about a girl at school.
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#10 - Putting Swim Fins on a Cat
Two and a Half Men - Season 5 - Episode 5
Charlie has to come up with ways to keep his girlfriend's 4-year-old amused; Alan becomes a test subject.
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#11 - That Voodoo That I Do Do
Two and a Half Men - Season 3 - Episode 8
Charlie tricks Jake into taking ballet lessons, so he can get close to the teacher.
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#12 - Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark
Two and a Half Men - Season 1 - Episode 20
Judith believes that Jake is having a hard time dealing with his parent's divorce, after he starts annoying everyone with his non-stop guitar playing. So she suggests that they send Jake to a therapist. Alan doesn't agree at first, but after thinking about it, he believes it might not be such a bad idea.
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#13 - Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell
Two and a Half Men - Season 1 - Episode 3
After spending a day at Disneyland, Jake gets sick and wants to go to his mothers' house, to have her take care of him. This sends Alan into a state of misery, as he realizes he's losing his wife, and son. Charlie suggests that they go drinking, and Alan agrees. After drinking the boys take a cab home, but at one point they end up at their mothers, where they try to tell her what they think of her, but fail in getting the point across.
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#14 - The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance
Two and a Half Men - Season 2 - Episode 6
Alan denies having shoplifted a toy as a child and fears he has a dark side, until Charlie admits he planted the toy on Alan to stay out of trouble himself.
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#15 - Large Birds, Spiders and Mom
Two and a Half Men - Season 5 - Episode 1
Jake is getting ready to start a new school as he graduates to Junior High. Alan and Charlie take him school shopping and find themselves in trouble.
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#16 - City of Great Racks
Two and a Half Men - Season 5 - Episode 4
Charlie and Linda get closer to consummating their relationship, but Charlie has trouble focusing when he begins to see Rose's face everywhere he turns.
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#17 - Winky-Dink Time
Two and a Half Men - Season 5 - Episode 14
Charlie double-dates with Jake and fixes Alan up with a hooker.
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#18 - Don't Worry, Speed Racer
Two and a Half Men - Season 4 - Episode 13
When Jake tells Charlie and Alan that he often overhears Judith and Herb (Ryan Stiles) making out, it triggers a repressed memory for Charlie.
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#19 - Apologies for the Frivolity
Two and a Half Men - Season 4 - Episode 6
Charlie is dating a woman whose personality and life are like his mother’s.
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#20 - And the Plot Moistens
Two and a Half Men - Season 3 - Episode 21
Jake’s teacher has a meeting with Alan and Judith to discuss the lack of interest Jake has at school. Alan starts to fall for Francine, in a platonic way, because he is tired of the lack of intelligent communication he has with Kandi. Charlie helps Jake audition for his school musical.
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#21 - Corey's Been Dead for an Hour
Two and a Half Men - Season 4 - Episode 9
Charlie gets tired of Alan's mooching and reaches the breaking point during the brothers' double date. Jake is left home alone for the first time.
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#22 - Rough Night In Hump Junction
Two and a Half Men - Season 5 - Episode 15
Alan feels Charlie is unable to control his womanizing ways.
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#23 - Young People Have Phlegm Too
Two and a Half Men - Season 4 - Episode 16
Charlie's young, hot girlfriend takes him to a new club. She invites Alan to meet one of her friends but the men are shocked to learn that they are considered as being "old".
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#24 - Golly Moses, She's a Muffin
Two and a Half Men - Season 3 - Episode 19
Charlie is surprised to find out that Kandi has been living with them for the last three weeks. Alan is having a tough time helping Kandi earn a living. Charlie has lost his sense because of the dry-spell he is going through.
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#25 - A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On
Two and a Half Men - Season 2 - Episode 21
Evelyn reads in the obituaries that her second husband, Harry has died. They all attend the funeral, including Jake who is excited at the opportunity of seeing a "dead guy". Charlie is excited by the opportunity of a newly single widow, and Alan is just happy to pay his respects to Harry.
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#26 - Meander to Your Dander
Two and a Half Men - Season 5 - Episode 11
When Alan finds himself wanting to break up with a woman, Charlie offers his expertise.
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#27 - That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother
Two and a Half Men - Season 2 - Episode 22
Evelyn buys Alan a new Sports car causing Charlie to claim that his brother has sold his soul to the Devil. The next day, Evelyn extracts payment by insisting that Alan go on a blind, double date with her, her new beau and his daughter. At the restaurant, Alan learns that his mother and boyfriend will not be able to join them because there was a mixup between his heart medication and Viagra and she didn't want to "waste it". As a result, Alan is left to deal with the daughter, who is on a weekend pass from a rehab center and still has some loose screws. Alan eventually gets her back to the beach house only to have her drive off in his new sports car and become the object of a televised high-speed car chase.
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#28 - Something Salted and Twisted
Two and a Half Men - Season 3 - Episode 10
Charlie helps Alan with his obsession of always having to get approval from the women in his life.
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#29 - Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor
Two and a Half Men - Season 1 - Episode 11
While at the movies, the brothers bump into Judith and her new boyfriend. Seeing that Judith has changed her look, and the fact that Jake doesn't think Alan is as cool as Judith; prompts Alan to realize that if he wants to get back into the dating scene, he's going to have to change his look as well.
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#30 - The Unfortunate Little Schnauser
Two and a Half Men - Season 3 - Episode 17
Charlie is nominated for an advertising award, but he decides to boycott it because his arch nemesis always wins. The rest of his family tries to trick him into going. Rose is having relationship problems with Gordon and seeks help from Charlie.
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#31 - Castrating Sheep in Montana
Two and a Half Men - Season 4 - Episode 12
Berta discovers that Alan has been dating her daughter (Sara Rue).
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#32 - Bad News from the Clinic?
Two and a Half Men - Season 2 - Episode 5
Charlie meets his match when he falls for a woman who's better at playing hard to get than he is.
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#33 - The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress
Two and a Half Men - Season 4 - Episode 3
Charlie tries to surf to impress Dottie, a beautiful woman he just met, but after he nearly drowns he is convinced that he saw his late father.
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#34 - Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats
Two and a Half Men - Season 1 - Episode 17
Alan offends Charlie by choosing harebrained cousins as Jake's guardians in the event of his death.
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#35 - Humiliation is a visual medium
Two and a Half Men - Season 3 - Episode 13
Charlie finds himself in a relationship that is not based on sex.
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#36 - Kissing Abe Lincoln
Two and a Half Men - Season 4 - Episode 10
Charlie must choose between his girlfriend and his housekeeper; Alan looks to sell Kandi's condo, but sex keeps getting in the way.
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#37 - If My Hole Could Talk
Two and a Half Men - Season 5 - Episode 18
Charlie's attracted to an older self-help author. Alan and Jake clash over a project for school.
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