The BEST episodes written by Ilana Wernick

Consummate Professional
star
8.10
735 votes

#1 - Consummate Professional

The King of Queens - Season 8 - Episode 3

Carrie finds out that while dating, Doug lied about getting a job to get her to sleep with him.

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A Community Hero and a Wide Turn
star
8.02
263 votes

#2 - A Community Hero and a Wide Turn

Mom - Season 8 - Episode 17

The women attend a gala honoring Marjorie, but Bonnie’s speech doesn’t go as planned.

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Second Marriage Guy
star
8.01
302 votes

#3 - Second Marriage Guy

'Til Death - Season 2 - Episode 14

When Eddie's friend Karl introduces him to his second wife, Eddie becomes jealous of Karl's relaxed marriage and convinces Joy that they should try out a "second marriage." Joy has her own ideas of how a "second marriage" should be causing Eddie to re-think his suggestion

Watch Now:AmazonApple TV
Awful Bigamy
star
7.98
681 votes

#4 - Awful Bigamy

The King of Queens - Season 6 - Episode 24

After Holly gets kicked out of her apartment, Arthur insists that she stay with him in the basement until she finds a new place, making Doug realize the benefits of having two women in his life.

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Furious Gorge
star
7.91
776 votes

#5 - Furious Gorge

The King of Queens - Season 7 - Episode 3

On the way to a overeating support group, Doug notices an abusive relationship group, and decides to join them instead. Although, Carrie becomes suspicious when he not only gains weight, but begins to cower in her presence.

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Family Portrait
star
7.88
5899 votes

#6 - Family Portrait

Modern Family - Season 1 - Episode 24

Claire makes an effort to take a new family portrait, but everybody is too busy to cooperate: Gloria and Manny go with Phil and Alex to a Lakers game and share an awkward moment on the jumbotron, Cameron gets a job as a wedding singer while Mitchell takes care of Lilly and a stray pigeon, and Luke interviews Jay for a school project.

Watch Now:AmazonApple TV
Holy Mackerel
star
7.85
772 votes

#7 - Holy Mackerel

The King of Queens - Season 5 - Episode 3

Doug and Carrie run into Father McAndrew at the fish market. They exchange pleasantries and as they are parting ways, Father McAndrew tells them that he would love to see them in church sometime. Unsure of how to decline politely, the Heffernans instead agree to attend Sunday's services. During the service, Carrie reflects on the one thing that she really needs help with – a raise. Miraculously, the following day, Carrie receives word that her prayers have been answered and that she is getting her raise. Much to Doug's dismay, Carrie's prayers turn to more frivolous things – like shoe sales. He does his best to convince her that God would never approve of her prayers, but soon enough Carrie catches Doug praying for the Jets to win their latest football game. Meanwhile, Arthur hosts an open house in order to sell the house. Unfortunately, he hasn't mentioned a word of his efforts to Doug or Carrie, the homeowners.

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Swimming with the Starks
star
7.85
299 votes

#8 - Swimming with the Starks

'Til Death - Season 2 - Episode 15

When Joy calls off their usual anniversary celebration and surprises Eddie with a gift, he decides to one-up her with a special snorkeling trip to Hawaii requiring him to take swimming lessons from Kenny.

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Slow Down Your Neighbors
star
7.84
6172 votes

#9 - Slow Down Your Neighbors

Modern Family - Season 2 - Episode 11

Claire becomes a vigilante to catch a car that speeds though their streets. Phil tries to land an important listing with a difficult client, Jay teaches Manny (and Gloria) how to ride a bike. Mitchell and Cameron meet a mysterious neighbor who is quite the charmer.

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Mother's Day
star
7.83
5682 votes

#10 - Mother's Day

Modern Family - Season 2 - Episode 21

Claire and Gloria's Mother's Day excursion with the kids turns into the mother of all disasters. Meanwhile, Phil and Jay share an awkward moment when they stay home to prepare dinner for everyone. Cameron worries about gender roles in his relationship with Mitchell.

Watch Now:AmazonApple TV
Guess Who's Coming to Frozen Dinner
star
7.83
601 votes

#11 - Guess Who's Coming to Frozen Dinner

The Middle - Season 9 - Episode 14

Mike's wayward brother, Rusty, comes to town and presents Sue with an extravagant gift, which Mike assumes is stolen goods; Mike tries to figure out a way to reconnect with Sue; Axl blows his first paycheck on a big-screen TV.

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The Christmas Miracle
star
7.82
589 votes

#12 - The Christmas Miracle

The Middle - Season 9 - Episode 10

Frankie and Sue are devastated when Axl informs them that he's not going to church; Mike goes to war with the Glossner kids after they keep defacing his giant inflatable snowman; Brick attempts to wrap his first present.

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Risky Business
star
7.79
700 votes

#13 - Risky Business

The Middle - Season 7 - Episode 4

Mike surprises Frankie when he wants to be involved in his brother's crazy business scheme; Axl goes to extreme measures to prove he can handle Mike's new motorcycle; and Sue begins living in her car to avoid her horrible roommate.

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Bat Out Of Heck
star
7.79
575 votes

#14 - Bat Out Of Heck

The Middle - Season 9 - Episode 19

Frankie is surprised but relieved when Dr. Goodwin agrees to buy all of the peanut brittle that Brick needs to sell for school. But the good doctor displays a bit of Mr. Hyde behavior when Frankie doesn’t deliver the product in an expeditious manner. Meanwhile, Axl is getting sick and tired of having Mike tell him how to run his life; and things go off the rails when Axl attempts to trade in the Winnebago and buy a car. Sue is more determined than ever to win a very prestigious and competitive hotel scholarship; and Frankie swears that she’s seeing something mysterious flying through the house.

Watch Now:Amazon
Please Don't Feed the Hecks
star
7.79
778 votes

#15 - Please Don't Feed the Hecks

The Middle - Season 9 - Episode 2

Frankie gives away unused items from the house in the hope of getting food in return; Sue and Lexie find their apartment is being inhabited; Axl's new job as a school bus driver gives him the opportunity to look after Brick.

Watch Now:Amazon
A Quarry Story
star
7.79
491 votes

#16 - A Quarry Story

The Middle - Season 6 - Episode 11

Frankie must work at Ehlert Motors for one day in order to collect her pay on an old, uncashed paycheck, Mike offers Sue a part-time job at the quarry, and Mike’s dad attempts to persuade a lazy Axl to help replace the damaged kitchen sink.

Watch Now:AmazonApple TV
Performance Anxiety
star
7.78
395 votes

#17 - Performance Anxiety

'Til Death - Season 2 - Episode 1

When Eddie thinks Joy made a fool of herself at Steph's birthday party he decides it is time to tell her about her irritating habits. She lets him know about his own irritating habits. Steph isn't happy when Jeff gives her a gift she has wanted for a long time.

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The Par-tay
star
7.78
887 votes

#18 - The Par-tay

The Middle - Season 8 - Episode 18

Mike's friendship with Bill Norwood is in jeopardy after Bill gets angry when Mike poaches his plumber at a reduced rate; Frankie is disappointed when Sue refuses to tell her who she has a crush on; Brick wants Axl to party with him at college.

Watch Now:Amazon
Class Struggle
star
7.77
919 votes

#19 - Class Struggle

The King of Queens - Season 3 - Episode 4

Carrie decides to return to college, with very little time to get things done.

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Patrons Ain't
star
7.76
641 votes

#20 - Patrons Ain't

The King of Queens - Season 4 - Episode 22

Carrie and Doug begin preparing for tax time and realize that their charitable giving leaves a little to be desired. In an effort to get out of feeling guilty and to make amends for what they see as "selfish living" in the past year, they decide to make a donation to the local kid's library at Deacon's son's school. However, Carrie's charitable spirit starts to be about recognition rather than the actual joy of giving. When the administration mistakenly thinks the Heffernans gave $500 rather than $50, Doug and Carrie scramble to keep the recognition without having to pay the price.

Watch Now:Amazon
Window Pain
star
7.76
902 votes

#21 - Window Pain

The King of Queens - Season 5 - Episode 2

Mike and Debi, a bright young couple, move in next door to Doug and Carrie. The Heffernans don't make the greatest first impression as an argument they're having can be heard throughout the neighborhood. Carrie feels that her job, as a legal secretary, and Doug's, as a truck driver, are insignificant next to her neighbors, who both hold professional jobs. She tries desperately to make a good impression on her new neighbors by inviting them over for dinner, but Doug thwarts her plan. Meanwhile, Arthur takes advantage of Spence's job at the subway by insisting on free rides.

Watch Now:AmazonApple TV
Apartment Complex
star
7.75
603 votes

#22 - Apartment Complex

The King of Queens - Season 8 - Episode 14

Doug and his pals rent an apartment to use as a secret hang-out. Meanwhile, Carrie goes to great lengths to please her newest client, Kirstie Alley.

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Tube Stakes
star
7.74
753 votes

#23 - Tube Stakes

The King of Queens - Season 2 - Episode 5

Carrie leaves the garage door open and Doug's big screen TV is stolen.

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No Complaints
star
7.74
206 votes

#24 - No Complaints

'Til Death - Season 4 - Episode 4

When Eddie and Joy try to live without complaining, Eddie finds that repressing his true feelings makes him sick. Meanwhile, Kenny creates problems for parents when he works as a mall Santa.

Watch Now:AmazonApple TV
Silent Mite
star
7.73
719 votes

#25 - Silent Mite

The King of Queens - Season 7 - Episode 7

While Christmas shopping at the mall, Doug loses his wallet and begins a quest to find the wallet and the culprit who may have stolen it. But with no help from Carrie or the cops, he requests the help of Arthur.

Watch Now:Amazon
Major Disturbance
star
7.73
738 votes

#26 - Major Disturbance

The King of Queens - Season 9 - Episode 4

The Palmers' vacation plans are ruined when Doug frightens Major so much that he refuses to be babysat by the Heffernans. In the meantime, Arthur begins hiring out himself and friends from the senior center to ride with solo drivers so they can use car-pool lanes.

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Connect Four
star
7.72
740 votes

#27 - Connect Four

The King of Queens - Season 5 - Episode 9

Carrie wins 4 company seats to Knicks games, but insists on taking a couple over Doug's friends. But when they realize Carrie's favored couple doesn't work for Doug, and Doug's favored couple doesn't work for Carrie, they decide on playing cupid. Meanwhile, Arthur digs himself a hole by pretending he can "fix" parking tickets.

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Swim Neighbors
star
7.71
873 votes

#28 - Swim Neighbors

The King of Queens - Season 3 - Episode 22

Doug and Carrie meet the neighbors after a hurricane destroys both of their backyards. Carrie breaks their hearts by telling the truth and rejects the idea of a combined backyard. So the neighbors retaliate by disrupting their privacy by making an aboveground pool in a small space. But as Carrie tries to mount a lawsuit, Doug can't deny the temptation and joins the other side. But before the pool goes down, Carrie takes a quick swim and later, Doug tries to enjoy the lawn sprinkler.

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Vinyl Flooring and a Cartoon Bear
star
7.71
251 votes

#29 - Vinyl Flooring and a Cartoon Bear

Mom - Season 8 - Episode 15

Bonnie and Tammy’s friendship is tested when they take on a big project together. Also, the women worry about a fracture in their tight-knit group.

Watch Now:AmazonApple TV
Hecks at a Movie
star
7.71
663 votes

#30 - Hecks at a Movie

The Middle - Season 7 - Episode 15

After discovering that Brick has never seen a movie in a theater, Frankie and Mike take him to see a film with a small scene that was partially shot in Orson. But when Brick sees a trailer for an upcoming "Planet Nowhere" film that he completely disapproves of, he makes it his mission to ensure that it won't ever play in that theater - or anywhere else. Meanwhile, Frankie and Mike get into a major disagreement over how events really unfolded when Mike shushes Frankie after he perceives that she was constantly interrupting Bill while he was telling a story; Sue runs into Logan - the hunky Abercrombie guy - and thinks she has a real chance of becoming his girlfriend; and Axl and Sean discover that they have unexpected ties to an event that happened when they were young.

Watch Now:Amazon
Four Neighbors and a Funeral
star
7.69
361 votes

#31 - Four Neighbors and a Funeral

'Til Death - Season 2 - Episode 2

Eddie and Joy feel left out when they are the only neighbors not included in an elderly neighbor's funeral. After Joy is asked to sing Eddie feeling jealous, tries to find something for him to do also. Steph and Jeff disagree about the eulogy Steph is planning to give.

Watch Now:AmazonApple TV
Endorphins and a Toasty Tushy
star
7.69
265 votes

#32 - Endorphins and a Toasty Tushy

Mom - Season 8 - Episode 14

Bonnie struggles with her own self-worth after Tammy finds success. Also, Jill’s new hobby leads to an unexpected revelation.

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Survey Says…
star
7.68
687 votes

#33 - Survey Says…

The Middle - Season 7 - Episode 20

Frankie is thrilled when Sue invites her for lunch at the college. But lunch becomes awkward when Sue brings her new boyfriend along - Jeremy, the school activist - and the two of them begin bombarding Frankie with everything she and the world, in general, are doing wrong. Meanwhile, Axl informs a very disappointed Mike that he wants to quit football, and Brick overly obsesses over filling out a satisfaction survey after ordering some graph paper online.

Thanksgiving VIII
star
7.68
884 votes

#34 - Thanksgiving VIII

The Middle - Season 8 - Episode 6

Frankie decides that April is not good enough to be with Axl and does anything she can to keep her out of the annual family Christmas photo. Frankie must fight for Axl's attention when he announces that he will be spending Thanksgiving with April.

Watch Now:Apple TV
Cowardly Lyin'
star
7.68
629 votes

#35 - Cowardly Lyin'

The King of Queens - Season 5 - Episode 19

Carrie gets tickets to an opera but Doug doesn't want to go so he has Deacon help him lie to get out of it. Carrie catches him in the lie which prompts Doug to confess to a series of lies he's been hiding. Doug then tells Carrie that the reason he's been lying is because she's too overbearing. They both agree to be "supportive" of one another but this only leads to more problems.

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Mama Cast
star
7.65
858 votes

#36 - Mama Cast

The King of Queens - Season 9 - Episode 1

Doug decides to spend the Heffernans' tax refund on an ice cream truck. Meanwhile, Carrie fills in as a pretend mom at model homes, and discovers a reemergence of her maternal desires.

Beef Baloney Dan and the Hot Zone
star
7.65
371 votes

#37 - Beef Baloney Dan and the Hot Zone

Mom - Season 7 - Episode 17

Bonnie suspects that Adam’s sponsor has an ulterior motive. Christy is caught in the middle when Tammy plays hard to get with Chef Rudy.

Watch Now:Apple TV
Dog Shelter
star
7.65
713 votes

#38 - Dog Shelter

The King of Queens - Season 5 - Episode 23

Carrie learns from Janet that Doug had a dog when he was 11, that they still have today, and Doug is 38! Janet admits to Carrie that the dog died, and they replaced it without Doug knowing.

Single Spaced
star
7.64
724 votes

#39 - Single Spaced

The King of Queens - Season 9 - Episode 11

Seeing friends who recently had a child makes Doug and Carrie consider adopting.

Doug Less (2)
star
7.64
670 votes

#40 - Doug Less (2)

The King of Queens - Season 6 - Episode 2

Doug surprises Carrie with a romantic weekend away at a resort. Doug and Carrie try to get over an argument they've been having, but only make things worse. Deacon finds Spence and Danny in bed together. Arthur decides he is in an emergency situation.

Dance Dance Revelation
star
7.63
6031 votes

#41 - Dance Dance Revelation

Modern Family - Season 2 - Episode 10

At Luke and Manny's first school dance, Jay and Phil take them to the mall which turns disastrous, Claire's is jealous when Gloria joins the school dance committee. Cameron and Mitchell learn about Lily biting other kids at the playground.

Watch Now:Apple TV
Restaurant Row
star
7.63
744 votes

#42 - Restaurant Row

The King of Queens - Season 2 - Episode 23

Carrie forbids Doug to eat at his favorite Italian restaurant.

Ovary And Out
star
7.62
921 votes

#43 - Ovary And Out

The Middle - Season 8 - Episode 13

Frankie becomes sad when her doctor informs her that her ovaries are shriveled up, which means her days of having kids are over. In an attempt to cheer her up, Mike offers to have him and Frankie babysit the neighbor's baby overnight, which puts some perspective on being an older parent. Meanwhile, Sue and Axl are a bit shocked when romantic sparks fly between Sean Donahue and Sue's roommate Lexie; and Brick tries his best to hone up on his font knowledge when he meets Gibson, a worthy font opponent.

Dammit Sandra and Viking Ancestors
star
7.59
380 votes

#44 - Dammit Sandra and Viking Ancestors

Mom - Season 7 - Episode 13

Christy is troubled when sparks fly between Tammy and Chef Rudy. Also, Bonnie overreacts when her therapist, Trevor, accuses her of rejecting his help.

Watch Now:Apple TV
Buy Curious
star
7.59
633 votes

#45 - Buy Curious

The King of Queens - Season 7 - Episode 22

When Doug and Carrie's neighbor passes away, their grief is quickly replaced by hope when they realize his empty residence could prove to be a profitable investment. In their dash to close escrow, they become wary of another neighbor, Lou, who's neighborly way of upkeeping the bereaved lawn raises their suspicions.

Twisted Sitters
star
7.59
754 votes

#46 - Twisted Sitters

The King of Queens - Season 3 - Episode 9

Doug and Carrie watch Deacon and Kelly's kids while they are out of town. When one of the kids sees them making love, they must keep him from telling his parents...

Sex Bucket and the Grammar Police
star
7.58
345 votes

#47 - Sex Bucket and the Grammar Police

Mom - Season 8 - Episode 1

When Bonnie invites the ladies to a slumber party, childhood games reveal adult problems.

Watch Now:Apple TV
Hi, School
star
7.58
614 votes

#48 - Hi, School

The King of Queens - Season 7 - Episode 14

When delivering a package to his old high school, Doug meets his old football coach, and against Carrie's wishes, begins to return to the school on a regular basis as the football hero. Meanwhile, after losing his eye drops, Arthur manages to lose his sense of hearing, sight, and speech in one day and becomes completely reliant on Holly.

Fresh Brood
star
7.57
588 votes

#49 - Fresh Brood

The King of Queens - Season 8 - Episode 12

Doug borrows a baby from Danny to prove to Carrie that they're ready for a family. Meanwhile, Arthur feels he deserves to be a coffee shop's "customer of the month."

Twirly Flippy Men and a Dirty Bird
star
7.57
461 votes

#50 - Twirly Flippy Men and a Dirty Bird

Mom - Season 7 - Episode 4

Christy escorts a reluctant Chef Rudy to court-ordered AA meetings. Also, Bonnie attempts to make Adam feel more at home in the apartment

Watch Now:Apple TV