The BEST episodes written by Alan Freedland

First Birthday
167 votes

#1 - First Birthday

Guys With Kids - Season 1 - Episode 8

Chris plans a nontraditional celebration for Ernie's first birthday; Manny and Gary try a kale-only diet; Sheila tries to deal with her breakup.

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Hank's Back Story
237 votes

#2 - Hank's Back Story

King of the Hill - Season 5 - Episode 19

While preparing for the big lawn mower races in Durndle, Hank experiences back trouble. When he goes to the doctor, he is told that he has a genetic disorder called Diminished Gluteal Syndrome (DGS), meaning that he has such a small rear end that it puts added stress on his spine. The doctor gives Hank a prosthetic butt to wear, but the shame of it is too much until Peggy gets him to go to a DGS support meeting.

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A Fire Fighting We Will Go
378 votes

#3 - A Fire Fighting We Will Go

King of the Hill - Season 3 - Episode 10

Hank and his friends become volunteer firefighters. They manage to wreck a fire hydrant, ruin a funeral, and finally burn down the Arlen firehouse. When the Fire Captain comes to ask what happened, the trio turns the story around to match each of their scenarios.

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Pishke Business
263 votes

#4 - Pishke Business

The Nanny - Season 2 - Episode 8

Fran has to pose as Ms. Babcock to get an investor interested in Maxwell's next play.

Jumpin' Crack Bass (It's a Gas, Gas, Gas)
350 votes

#5 - Jumpin' Crack Bass (It's a Gas, Gas, Gas)

King of the Hill - Season 2 - Episode 5

Hank can't catch any fish with hand-dug American Earthworms, so he decides to try some artificial bait. Unfortunately, he mistakenly buys crack cocaine, thinking that it's fishing bait -- and the fish become addicted to his new bait. Hank gets in trouble with the law when he goes back to the dealer to buy some stronger bait.

High Anxiety
219 votes

#6 - High Anxiety

King of the Hill - Season 4 - Episode 14

Debbie is found dead in the dumpster behind Sugarfoot's restaurant, and Hank is a suspect. Hank was with Debbie's roommate Gayle at the time, but he's afraid to tell the police, because he'd have to admit that he accidentally smoked some of Gayle's marijuana. Buck decides that he loves his wife after all.

Happy Hank's Giving
299 votes

#7 - Happy Hank's Giving

King of the Hill - Season 4 - Episode 7

Hank and his family plan to visit Peggy's family in Montana for Thanksgiving. But their plane is delayed, and when they finally get on the plane, the flight is cancelled when Hank's Thanksgiving turkey is mistaken for a bomb.

Tankin' It to the Streets
188 votes

#8 - Tankin' It to the Streets

King of the Hill - Season 6 - Episode 13

After learning the Army used him as a guinea pig for an experimental drug, Bill gets drunk and steals a tank, but Dale reveals that the information is wrong, Bill was not used as an experiment. The guys have to prove to Bill that his life is as it is without military tampering, and get him to surrender the tank.

The Final Shinsult
222 votes

#9 - The Final Shinsult

King of the Hill - Season 2 - Episode 18

When Cotton learns that the U.S. government is giving the artificial leg of General Santa Ana back to Mexico, he teams up with Dale to steal the leg from the Arlen Museum.

The Wrestler
1238 votes

#10 - The Wrestler

American Dad! - Season 8 - Episode 12

When Barry (guest voice Eddie Kay Thomas) threatens Stan's old high school wrestling record, Stan enlists Roger to beat Barry and defend his small claim to fame. However, Stan is caught off-guard when Roger, not Barry, is actually the threat to Stan's record.

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Snow Job
291 votes

#11 - Snow Job

King of the Hill - Season 2 - Episode 13

When Hank's boss, Buck Strickland, has another heart attack, Hank expects to be put in charge of the company while Buck is recuperating. Instead Buck picks Lloyd Vickers, a business-school graduate, and puts Hank in charge of feeding his dogs. At Buck's house, Hank discovers that Buck's stove is electric, not propane. Realizing that Buck is just in propane for the money, Hank considers leaving the propane business and opening up a general store instead.

Take Me Out of the Ball Game
289 votes

#12 - Take Me Out of the Ball Game

King of the Hill - Season 3 - Episode 24

When Thaterton stacks his Company softball team with Pro sports stars, Hank pulls Peggy off of her own Softball team to become the Ace pitcher for Strickland Propane. Unfortunately, Hank's over-managing causes her to lose her stuff, and cause her to lose the love for the sport.

Home Wrecker
1389 votes

#13 - Home Wrecker

American Dad! - Season 7 - Episode 17

Stan and Francine fight over how to redecorate the house. It goes so far that they split the house down the middle and try to live without each other. Meanwhile, Principal Lewis discovers a talent of Barry.

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Death of a Propane Salesman
337 votes

#14 - Death of a Propane Salesman

King of the Hill - Season 3 - Episode 1

Hank and Luanne survive the Mega Lo Mart explosion, but Buckley is no more. Hank finds that he is scared of propane, and tries to figure out how to deal with his fear of dying. Meanwhile, Luanne, who lost all her hair in the explosion, decides to become an activist like Sinead O'Connor.

An Incident at Owl Creek
2179 votes

#15 - An Incident at Owl Creek

American Dad! - Season 6 - Episode 17

In preparation for a neighborhood pool party, Stan tells his family to get in tip-top shape. But when an accident ruins the Smith family name, a humiliated Stan fakes his family’s deaths and moves everyone out of Langley Falls to escape his shame.

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Shins of the Father
387 votes

#16 - Shins of the Father

King of the Hill - Season 1 - Episode 8

Hank's father Cotton, a sexist loudmouth who lost his shins fighting in WWII, makes a grand entrance at Bobby's birthday party, saving the day. Peggy can't stand his ways, but he is Bobby's hero, and when Bobby begins to emulate his chauvenistic behavior, Hank reluctantly steps in.

Me Time
172 votes

#17 - Me Time

Guys With Kids - Season 1 - Episode 13

Overwhelmed by pressure at work and at home, Marny lies to Gary in hope of securing some time alone; when Chris signs the group up for trivia night, Nick and Sheila's competitive nature causes problems.

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Next of Shin
280 votes

#18 - Next of Shin

King of the Hill - Season 3 - Episode 5

Hank tries several different methods to improve his sperm count so he can get Peggy pregnant. The frustration of not being able to have another child becomes worse when Cotton shows up and announces that he got his wife pregnant. But Cotton becomes so nervous at the prospect of having a baby at his age that he flees to Las Vegas, and Hank, Bill and Dale go after him.

The Texas Skilsaw Massacre
281 votes

#19 - The Texas Skilsaw Massacre

King of the Hill - Season 7 - Episode 7

When Hank falls through his kitchen floor, he discovers the underground escape tunnel Dale has been building. What's worse, Hank can't move back into his house until the floor is repaired, and he is forced to move in with the Gribbles, where Dale's annoying habits threaten to push Hank over the edge. When Hank accidentally cuts off Dale's finger with a skilsaw, Dale claims he did it on purpose. A judge orders Hank to stay 100 yards away from Dale at all times, and to attend anger management classes.

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The Candidate
26 votes

#20 - The Candidate

The Freak Brothers - Season 1 - Episode 7

When Harper’s billionaire tech bro boss runs for Mayor of San Francisco, Phineas is determined to challenge the man’s pro-data-mining policy agenda.

When Cotton Comes Marching Home
227 votes

#21 - When Cotton Comes Marching Home

King of the Hill - Season 5 - Episode 6

Cotton can't support his wife and baby on his pension, so he moves from Houston to the Arlen VFW. Hank gets him a job at a local restaurant, but the manager won't let Cotton have a day off to march in the Veterans' Day parade. Meanwhile, Peggy tries to create an eye-catching float for the parade.

Peggy's Fan Fair
250 votes

#22 - Peggy's Fan Fair

King of the Hill - Season 4 - Episode 24

When the Hills go to the Country Music Fan Fair in Nashville, Peggy hears Randy Travis singing a new song, "Just the Way God Made Me," and accuses him of having stolen it from her.

Squatters’ Rights
41 votes

#23 - Squatters’ Rights

The Freak Brothers - Season 1 - Episode 2

The Freaks attempt to regrow the same strain of dope that transported them to 2020 by incubating a small seed stuck inside Freddy’s ass.